Online Dating

[Lancashire_Lou]

 

 

I think we can safely assume the best I should hope to get out of this experience is not to get murdered.

Edited September 4, 2016 by Lancashire_Lou

[Paolo]

 

 

I think we can safely assume the best I should hope to get out of this experience is not to get murdered.

Never mind that, is it circumcised or uncircumcised?

[Sooperstar]

 

 

I think we can safely assume the best I should hope to get out of this experience is not to get murdered.

Pretty sure that top one is Donald Trump Jr.

[iantjambo]

Never mind that, is it circumcised or uncircumcised?

And Kinky or non kinky?

[Harry Potter]

And Kinky or non kinky?

As said before, glad im out of this dating game, seems rather complicated now, Hearts and a pie for me.

[Paolo]

As said before, glad im out of this dating game, seems rather complicated now, Hearts and a pie for me.

Home made steak pie?

[Harry Potter]

Home made steak pie?

Yep.

[Lancashire_Lou]

I'm starting to think I'm just better off staying at home and eating my own steak pie.

 

 

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[iantjambo]

I'm starting to think I'm just better off staying at home and eating my own steak pie.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Ryan Jarman]

If that's true then you should probably stick 'flexible' in your profile.

[Neilson's Shank]

If that's true then you should probably stick 'flexible' in your profile.

This is heading for the classics

[Maiden Gorgie]

 

 

I think we can safely assume the best I should hope to get out of this experience is not to get murdered.

 

 

 

 

This is heading for the classics

 

and

[The Mighty Thor]

If that's true then you should probably stick 'flexible' in your profile.

[emoji38]

[Samuel Camazzola]

I'll be honest she's a dirty not marriage material obviously but she'll do for now.

 

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Everyone is still awaiting updates. Nearly a month on, is the above still the status?

[gjcc]

Everyone is still awaiting updates. Nearly a month on, is the above still the status?

Al Qaeda hostage type video with him declaring undying love for her surely on its way.

[Harry Potter]

Everyone is still awaiting updates. Nearly a month on, is the above still the status?

Mad in love and ready to go down on one knee.

[EreWeG0..]

Everyone is still awaiting updates. Nearly a month on, is the above still the status?

A month on...may be a delayed answer..he may not be allowed on the computer yet, needs to do his chores for the boss first.

 

Edited September 6, 2016 by EreWeG0..

[Homme]

We need to know if she is still a side salad!

[Sarah O]

Preggers nap.

[Салатные палочки]

I'll try and update to the best of my abilities (not with a knife at my throat btw) 

 

Okay so that's been a month say, give or take a week.  I told her a couple of weeks I'm not looking for a needy or clingy bursd, which to be honest she was coming accross as.  She admitted she had maybe been a bit full-on and said she would calm it down but immediately the alarm bells were ringing.  I am now at the point where I am convinced she is a bit of a nutter.  To compound matters, I actually don't fancy her as much as I initially thought I did.  

 

I have, over the years, began to appreciate my own company.  When I don't have my kids I like to get in from work and chill on my own, watch the telly, play a bit of the kids playstation, have a cup of tea, have a beer.  But I suppose when you get into a relationship you need to give up a certain percentage of your "me" time and dedicate to the female in question.  That's fine by me and, like most of us we enjoy the company of a female/male, whatever your preference.  However, what I can't be doing with the constant texting back and forth.  I mean a message every two mins.  I also like to have my kids overnight Fri one week Fri/Sat the next week without being questioned about it.  I play in two pipe bands so a couple of nights per week is dedicated to practice and sometimes the odd gig.  I suppose what I'm trying to say is that I probably don't have the time to dedicate to a full-time relationship and "casual dating" is probably more apt.  She is certainly looking for a bit more.  I have made her aware of this and she said she was cool with it, but gets the hump every time I am non-committal to a question like "where do you see this going" etc.  

 

To some of you who berated me the last time and called me "desperate" and "pathetic" after my OP, this may be ammunition to allow you to get torn right in but I have come to realise with this online dating lark, its a case of suck it and see.  I suppose I am a bit of a pussy when it comes to telling a girl I am just not that into her as I initially was but any advice with regards to finishing this would be greatly appreciated, as I cannot see it going anywhere.  I don't think she does either but she is clinging on to it and dropping the odd hint about full-time relationships etc.  

 

Perhaps our Lou could give me a female's perspective on this.  

[IronJambo]

I'll try and update to the best of my abilities (not with a knife at my throat btw)

 

Okay so that's been a month say, give or take a week. I told her a couple of weeks I'm not looking for a needy or clingy bursd, which to be honest she was coming accross as. She admitted she had maybe been a bit full-on and said she would calm it down but immediately the alarm bells were ringing. I am now at the point where I am convinced she is a bit of a nutter. To compound matters, I actually don't fancy her as much as I initially thought I did.

 

I have, over the years, began to appreciate my own company. When I don't have my kids I like to get in from work and chill on my own, watch the telly, play a bit of the kids playstation, have a cup of tea, have a beer. But I suppose when you get into a relationship you need to give up a certain percentage of your "me" time and dedicate to the female in question. That's fine by me and, like most of us we enjoy the company of a female/male, whatever your preference. However, what I can't be doing with the constant texting back and forth. I mean a message every two mins. I also like to have my kids overnight Fri one week Fri/Sat the next week without being questioned about it. I play in two pipe bands so a couple of nights per week is dedicated to practice and sometimes the odd gig. I suppose what I'm trying to say is that I probably don't have the time to dedicate to a full-time relationship and "casual dating" is probably more apt. She is certainly looking for a bit more. I have made her aware of this and she said she was cool with it, but gets the hump every time I am non-committal to a question like "where do you see this going" etc.

 

To some of you who berated me the last time and called me "desperate" and "pathetic" after my OP, this may be ammunition to allow you to get torn right in but I have come to realise with this online dating lark, its a case of suck it and see. I suppose I am a bit of a pussy when it comes to telling a girl I am just not that into her as I initially was but any advice with regards to finishing this would be greatly appreciated, as I cannot see it going anywhere. I don't think she does either but she is clinging on to it and dropping the odd hint about full-time relationships etc.

 

Perhaps our Lou could give me a female's perspective on this.

Start to get really weird. Blow your nose in her pants, wipe Mr Happy on her tops. Speak about the time you had to do a dump in a field after a lad called Chester caught you with his Mrs whilst wearing a fireman's outfit. Tell her you sometimes fantasise about being a girl and ask her if you can wear her clothes. Take her down the pub in her kit if she lets you wear it. Tell her your sometimes fantasise about your aunty because she's got hairy pits and it really does it for you.

[southcap]

Have you told her about your previous conviction for arson?

Now is a good time...

[Ryan Jarman]

Honesty. 

 

Just be honest with her. She might hate you for breaking if off but if you go about it the right way - honest break up face to face she can't complain much. Also if this is what you want then don't be guilted into continuing due to her sadness/pleading, won't make either of you happy. 

 

Or just send her nudes of you bawdeep in steak pie lady. Your call. 

[Irufushi]

Where do you see us going? After a month

 

Best being honest, you sound happy with the "me" time. Maybe best staying single, for now.

[Dawnrazor]

Ask her if she up for a girl/girl threesome, win win for you, if it's yes you get a threesome if it's no you get dumped!!

[Malcolm Tucker]

Call her bluff and propose to her, crank that shit up to 11 and deal with the consequences.

 

It's what JKB wants.

[Jambo dans les Pyrenees]

I'll try and update to the best of my abilities (not with a knife at my throat btw) 

 

Okay so that's been a month say, give or take a week.  I told her a couple of weeks I'm not looking for a needy or clingy bursd, which to be honest she was coming accross as.  She admitted she had maybe been a bit full-on and said she would calm it down but immediately the alarm bells were ringing.  I am now at the point where I am convinced she is a bit of a nutter.  To compound matters, I actually don't fancy her as much as I initially thought I did.  

 

I have, over the years, began to appreciate my own company.  When I don't have my kids I like to get in from work and chill on my own, watch the telly, play a bit of the kids playstation, have a cup of tea, have a beer.  But I suppose when you get into a relationship you need to give up a certain percentage of your "me" time and dedicate to the female in question.  That's fine by me and, like most of us we enjoy the company of a female/male, whatever your preference.  However, what I can't be doing with the constant texting back and forth.  I mean a message every two mins.  I also like to have my kids overnight Fri one week Fri/Sat the next week without being questioned about it.  I play in two pipe bands so a couple of nights per week is dedicated to practice and sometimes the odd gig.  I suppose what I'm trying to say is that I probably don't have the time to dedicate to a full-time relationship and "casual dating" is probably more apt.  She is certainly looking for a bit more.  I have made her aware of this and she said she was cool with it, but gets the hump every time I am non-committal to a question like "where do you see this going" etc.  

 

To some of you who berated me the last time and called me "desperate" and "pathetic" after my OP, this may be ammunition to allow you to get torn right in but I have come to realise with this online dating lark, its a case of suck it and see.  I suppose I am a bit of a pussy when it comes to telling a girl I am just not that into her as I initially was but any advice with regards to finishing this would be greatly appreciated, as I cannot see it going anywhere.  I don't think she does either but she is clinging on to it and dropping the odd hint about full-time relationships etc.  

 

Perhaps our Lou could give me a female's perspective on this.  

 

You might change over time, you might not, and want more of a relationship.  But the massive, red lights flashing, siren wailing, jets scrambled question is the "where do you see this going" question after a month.  A month FFS.

[Auld Reekin']

Ask her if she up for a girl/girl threesome, win win for you, if it's yes you get a threesome if it's no you get dumped!!

 

Nice one... Probably best if it isn't with Steak Pie Bursd though, as things might get unnecessarily complicated again.

[Maroon Sailor]

Ask her if she can make a decent steak pie - if not then give her the Spanish archer treatment

 

Steak pie > clingy woman

[Sarah O]

Pretty sure I said you should have a date with Lou?

 

Sound like a good match.

 

Better than the Swedish ones. Plus, Lou's aware you're a Stallion in the sack.

 

This is a good starting point.

 

Lou, what say you?

JKB wedding.

 

[Morgan]

JKB wedding.

Who's to be the best man

[jack D and coke]

I joined POF off the back of this thread...mainly for a nosey you understand but **** me I wasn't aware there was so many ugly women out there! I've literally been pissing myself laughing at some of them...

Absolutely brutal[emoji23]

Chatting to one the now who used to go out with Stevie Crawford and is pally with oor Robbie! Should i go in at the back of our assistant manager?

 

 

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[Governor Tarkin]

Chatting to one the now who used to go out with Stevie Crawford and is pally with oor Robbie! Should i go in at the back of our assistant manager?

 

I think I may know this girl

[robbo1874]

I think I may know this girl

Haha a nap to happen!!

[jack D and coke]

I think I may know this girl

[emoji1]Give me a wee clue. Initials?

 

 

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[Arthur Morgan]

This thread is brilliant

[Paolo]

Ask her if she up for a girl/girl threesome, win win for you, if it's yes you get a threesome if it's no you get dumped!!

Now, I like that idea.

[Jason Dufner]

Honesty. 

 

Just be honest with her. She might hate you for breaking if off but if you go about it the right way - honest break up face to face she can't complain much. Also if this is what you want then don't be guilted into continuing due to her sadness/pleading, won't make either of you happy. 

 

Or just send her nudes of you bawdeep in steak pie lady. Your call.

 

Your final suggestion is exactly the next steps that should be taken here.

[Lancashire_Lou]

 

 

Perhaps our Lou could give me a female's perspective on this.

You need to tell her the truth 100% for both your sakes. You don't want to feel trapped for the sake of not rocking the boat & she doesn't want to end up falling in love with someone who isn't singing from the same hymn sheet.

 

I don't really have any dating experience tbh. Went on my first ever proper date this year; didn't fancy him & just told him that the next day. (As nicely as possible). Next guy I dated it was (I believed) going really well for 7/8 dates & over a couple of months but then he buggered off abroad for 3 months & still wasn't really wanting to commit so I scrapped that one too.

 

Now I'm just in it to entertain you guys I guess.

[Neilson's Shank]

You need to tell her the truth 100% for both your sakes. You don't want to feel trapped for the sake of not rocking the boat & she doesn't want to end up falling in love with someone who isn't singing from the same hymn sheet.

I don't really have any dating experience tbh. Went on my first ever proper date this year; didn't fancy him & just told him that the next day. (As nicely as possible). Next guy I dated it was (I believed) going really well for 7/8 dates & over a couple of months but then he buggered off abroad for 3 months & still wasn't really wanting to commit so I scrapped that one too.

Now I'm just in it to entertain you guys I guess.

We understand, any date will be you taking one for the team

[Lancashire_Lou]

We understand, any date will be you taking one for the team

Shagging for science. Or something.

[Paolo]

Now Salad Fingers has had some steak pie, does he not fancy some Lancashire hot pot?

[redm]

I'll try and update to the best of my abilities (not with a knife at my throat btw)

 

Okay so that's been a month say, give or take a week. I told her a couple of weeks I'm not looking for a needy or clingy bursd, which to be honest she was coming accross as. She admitted she had maybe been a bit full-on and said she would calm it down but immediately the alarm bells were ringing. I am now at the point where I am convinced she is a bit of a nutter. To compound matters, I actually don't fancy her as much as I initially thought I did.

 

I have, over the years, began to appreciate my own company. When I don't have my kids I like to get in from work and chill on my own, watch the telly, play a bit of the kids playstation, have a cup of tea, have a beer. But I suppose when you get into a relationship you need to give up a certain percentage of your "me" time and dedicate to the female in question. That's fine by me and, like most of us we enjoy the company of a female/male, whatever your preference. However, what I can't be doing with the constant texting back and forth. I mean a message every two mins. I also like to have my kids overnight Fri one week Fri/Sat the next week without being questioned about it. I play in two pipe bands so a couple of nights per week is dedicated to practice and sometimes the odd gig. I suppose what I'm trying to say is that I probably don't have the time to dedicate to a full-time relationship and "casual dating" is probably more apt. She is certainly looking for a bit more. I have made her aware of this and she said she was cool with it, but gets the hump every time I am non-committal to a question like "where do you see this going" etc.

 

To some of you who berated me the last time and called me "desperate" and "pathetic" after my OP, this may be ammunition to allow you to get torn right in but I have come to realise with this online dating lark, its a case of suck it and see. I suppose I am a bit of a pussy when it comes to telling a girl I am just not that into her as I initially was but any advice with regards to finishing this would be greatly appreciated, as I cannot see it going anywhere. I don't think she does either but she is clinging on to it and dropping the odd hint about full-time relationships etc.

 

Perhaps our Lou could give me a female's perspective on this.

Short summary: you're just not that into her? If you were, you'd most probably go out of your way just to spend time together regardless of your many commitments. If you really like someone I always think that stuff generally takes care of itself. No epic romance ever started with a guy/girl saying to the other "Ummm, please don't be so needy eh?".... Why waste what little precious time you do have on someone you just don't really rate?

 

Honesty time. A simple "it's been fun but this really isn't for me, I'm sorry. All the best to you" should be enough? It's still way too early for any dramatic heartbreak induced rage. Hopefully

[Auld Reekin']

Short summary: you're just not that into her? If you were, you'd most probably go out of your way just to spend time together regardless of your many commitments. If you really like someone I always think that stuff generally takes care of itself. No epic romance ever started with a guy/girl saying to the other "Ummm, please don't be so needy eh?".... Why waste what little precious time you do have on someone you just don't really rate?

 

Honesty time. A simple "it's been fun but this really isn't for me, I'm sorry. All the best to you" should be enough? It's still way too early for any dramatic heartbreak induced rage. Hopefully

 

On the other hand, quite a lot of guys (and, I'm sure, a fair few women) would really have a problem with a partner who - for example - insists on holding hands wherever they go, feels the need to text and/or 'phone numerous times every day, and clearly resents any time that the other person takes to themselves. For many this would be a problem at any stage of a relationship. This doesn't necessarily mean that they are not that bothered about the other person, it's probably just be the way they're wired. (SF has admitted as much in an earlier post and I can identify with this also.)

 

Of course, this doesn't mean that the situation with Ms. Lanarkshire is the right one for either her or SF, but - in my opinion anyway - it doesn't mean it's the wrong one, or a waste of time. Who knows? (Clearly not SF anyway...) Time will tell. 

 

Don't miss the next thrilling instalment of 'Salad Daze'!

[redm]

On the other hand, quite a lot of guys (and, I'm sure, a fair few women) would really have a problem with a partner who - for example - insists on holding hands wherever they go, feels the need to text and/or 'phone numerous times every day, and clearly resents any time that the other person takes to themselves. For many this would be a problem at any stage of a relationship. This doesn't necessarily mean that they are not that bothered about the other person, it's probably just be the way they're wired. (SF has admitted as much in an earlier post and I can identify with this also.)

 

Of course, this doesn't mean that the situation with Ms. Lanarkshire is the right one for either her or SF, but - in my opinion anyway - it doesn't mean it's the wrong one, or a waste of time. Who knows? (Clearly not SF anyway...) Time will tell.

 

Don't miss the next thrilling instalment of 'Salad Daze'!

Oh definitely, everyone needs their own time. Or everyone except the crackpots, it seems... [emoji51]

 

I was more referencing the stuff he said about not really fancying her and how he doesn't have a whole lot of time to give anyway. If two people are right into each other, I reckon the time and effort things just often seem to take care of themselves a lot more easily and without the imbalance in terms of who wants more from the other.

[Auld Reekin']

Oh definitely, everyone needs their own time. Or everyone except the crackpots, it seems... [emoji51]

 

I was more referencing the stuff he said about not really fancying her and how he doesn't have a whole lot of time to give anyway. If two people are right into each other, I reckon the time and effort things just often seem to take care of themselves a lot more easily and without the imbalance in terms of who wants more from the other.

 

Totally agree with your final sentence. However, it's probably not entirely wise to ignore the male capacity for macho posturing and underplaying "emotional issues", particularly on a football-related internet forum!   

[Maroon Sailor]

Throw her the old classic Salad

 

" It's not you it's me "

[Boof]

Throw her the old classic Salad

 

" It's not you it's me "

Or the more truthful "It's not me, it's you".

[Gorgiewave]

On the other hand, quite a lot of guys (and, I'm sure, a fair few women) would really have a problem with a partner who - for example - insists on holding hands wherever they go, feels the need to text and/or 'phone numerous times every day, and clearly resents any time that the other person takes to themselves. For many this would be a problem at any stage of a relationship. This doesn't necessarily mean that they are not that bothered about the other person, it's probably just be the way they're wired. (SF has admitted as much in an earlier post and I can identify with this also.)

 

Of course, this doesn't mean that the situation with Ms. Lanarkshire is the right one for either her or SF, but - in my opinion anyway - it doesn't mean it's the wrong one, or a waste of time. Who knows? (Clearly not SF anyway...) Time will tell. 

 

Don't miss the next thrilling instalment of 'Salad Daze'!

 

Many bonus points for putting an apostrophe in 'phone.

[Jambo dans les Pyrenees]

Short summary: you're just not that into her? If you were, you'd most probably go out of your way just to spend time together regardless of your many commitments. If you really like someone I always think that stuff generally takes care of itself. No epic romance ever started with a guy/girl saying to the other "Ummm, please don't be so needy eh?".... Why waste what little precious time you do have on someone you just don't really rate?

 

Honesty time. A simple "it's been fun but this really isn't for me, I'm sorry. All the best to you" should be enough? It's still way too early for any dramatic heartbreak induced rage. Hopefully

In my experience of the fairer sex, it is never too early for a bit of rage.