Harry Potter Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 33 minutes ago, IronJambo said: Spotify: Sat on a train and my Mrs is on her fat arse at home using her phone to mess with my music Going to have to get Google Home and start messing with the lights and stuff. Re-training the order of the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Caine Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 Advert breaks that seem to last longer than the bloody programme you're watching. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 4 hours ago, Harry Potter said: People out on their bikes at 8pm at night blocking the road when your trying to get your wife to work, Its 1C raining, this was not folk coming from work but out for a joyfull ride on their bikes. Misery guts Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Potter Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 55 minutes ago, Morgan said: Misery guts Aye i know pal, now wheres my bike , oops not got one, grew out of it at 17. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Potter Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 1 hour ago, Horatio Caine said: Advert breaks that seem to last longer than the bloody programme you're watching. One day tv wont have adverts, great watching catch up as all adverts are removed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 3 minutes ago, Harry Potter said: Aye i know pal, now wheres my bike , oops not got one, fell off it drunk at 17. Ftfy Harold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 2 hours ago, IronJambo said: Spotify: Sat on a train and my Mrs is on her fat arse at home using her phone to mess with my music Going to have to get Google Home and start messing with the lights and stuff. I had great fun winding up my Mrs with the Amazon Echo when she was sat at home and I was in the pub. Made all the more enjoyable by being able to listen back to her pleading 'Alexa, no more music tonight'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 1 hour ago, Sooperstar said: I had great fun winding up my Mrs with the Amazon Echo when she was sat at home and I was in the pub. Made all the more enjoyable by being able to listen back to her pleading 'Alexa, no more music tonight'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Potter Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 2 hours ago, Morgan said: Ftfy Harold. very good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tazio Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 3 hours ago, Sooperstar said: I had great fun winding up my Mrs with the Amazon Echo when she was sat at home and I was in the pub. Made all the more enjoyable by being able to listen back to her pleading 'Alexa, no more music tonight'. A good game is to go into John Lewis electronic department and pair your phone to a nice loud bluetooth speaker, pop on the loudest most offensive bit of music you have then pop your phone back in your pocket and leave the speaker blasting away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BM1874 Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 The wee scumbags who smoke around the back of my flat building who decide to throw a lit cigarette into our Bathroom on Thursday night whilst I’m in the living room with the 2 children (aged 6 and 2) and the Mrs is sleeping in the bedroom absolute wee clowns, No idea where they live but know if I was to challenge them, windows would be put in. probably the same wee dicks who left the can of juice that was rattling around outside the bedroom window all this morning and woke me up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OBE Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 (edited) *****Warning***** If I catch you, I'll make you wear it. Dog walker lets his/her mutt crap outside my house, he/she scoops the mess up and places the faeces in a crap bag. Do they then dispose of the bag in an appropriate place? Do they £uck. They stick it in my Privet Hedge. Oh to be given an opportunity to catch this disgusting clarty b*s*a*d. Edited February 10, 2018 by Old Blue Eyes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OBE Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 1 hour ago, jonnothejambo said: Disgusting. There are some right clarty middens going about. What I can't understand Jonno is they go to the trouble of bagging the shit, then they become a shit by not disposing of it properly, maybe I've upset this clart in the past. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superjack Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 Unblocking the bath. I know the job needs done regularly, but why do I have to do it? There are 2 females in the house whos hair is what causes the blockage. I on the other hand have not had enough hair to block a midges arsehole since my early 20s. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superjack Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 (edited) 1 minute ago, jonnothejambo said: I have seen dog shit on the ground a few feet away from the bins specifically provided for the purpose of disposing it. The main problem is though jonno, the bins for the dogshit are too high for most dogs to get their arses in. Edited February 10, 2018 by superjack Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 18 minutes ago, superjack said: Unblocking the bath. I know the job needs done regularly, but why do I have to do it? There are 2 females in the house whos hair is what causes the blockage. I on the other hand have not had enough hair to block a midges arsehole since my early 20s. 17 minutes ago, superjack said: The main problem is though jonno, the bins for the dogshit are too high for most dogs to get their arses in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tazio Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 Definitely dogshit? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superjack Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 50 minutes ago, Tazio said: Definitely dogshit? Was there a discarded sock near by? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OBE Posted February 11, 2018 Share Posted February 11, 2018 13 hours ago, superjack said: Unblocking the bath. I know the job needs done regularly, but why do I have to do it? There are 2 females in the house whos hair is what causes the blockage. I on the other hand have not had enough hair to block a midges arsehole since my early 20s. You do it because you're a creature of habit, break your habit and your problem is solved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IronJambo Posted February 11, 2018 Share Posted February 11, 2018 6 hours ago, Old Blue Eyes said: You do it because you're a creature of habit, break your habit and your problem is solved. Naw, if he breaks the habit the water won't drain away. The women won't do this job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stupid Sexy Flanders Posted February 11, 2018 Share Posted February 11, 2018 On 10/02/2018 at 08:06, BM1874 said: The wee scumbags who smoke around the back of my flat building who decide to throw a lit cigarette into our Bathroom on Thursday night whilst I’m in the living room with the 2 children (aged 6 and 2) and the Mrs is sleeping in the bedroom absolute wee clowns, No idea where they live but know if I was to challenge them, windows would be put in. probably the same wee dicks who left the can of juice that was rattling around outside the bedroom window all this morning and woke me up On 10/02/2018 at 09:23, Old Blue Eyes said: *****Warning***** If I catch you, I'll make you wear it. Dog walker lets his/her mutt crap outside my house, he/she scoops the mess up and places the faeces in a crap bag. Do they then dispose of the bag in an appropriate place? Do they £uck. They stick it in my Privet Hedge. Oh to be given an opportunity to catch this disgusting clarty b*s*a*d. These are both appalling, there really are some utter arseholes in the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OBE Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 (edited) On 11/02/2018 at 08:59, IronJambo said: Naw, if he breaks the habit the water won't drain away. The women won't do this job. The women would soon remove their fuzz from the plug hole if their dirt was stagnating from an earlier bathing session. Mind games IJ, mind games. Only have a shower, no bath facility, miss it terribly, especially in the winter after compulsory golf matches. Edited February 12, 2018 by Old Blue Eyes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 3 hours ago, Old Blue Eyes said: The women would soon remove their fuzz from the plug hole if their dirt was stagnating from an earlier bathing session. Mind games IJ, mind games. Only have a shower, no bath facility, miss it terribly, especially in the winter after compulsory golf matches. Baths are shite. I think even lassies know that deep down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milky_26 Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 4 minutes ago, Sooperstar said: Baths are shite. I think even lassies know that deep down. after a while, you are just sitting in water with your own filth through it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 5 minutes ago, Sooperstar said: Baths are shite. I think even lassies know that deep down. Completely agree. Baths are for folk who like to wallow in their own grime. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IronJambo Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 4 hours ago, Old Blue Eyes said: The women would soon remove their fuzz from the plug hole if their dirt was stagnating from an earlier bathing session. Mind games IJ, mind games. Only have a shower, no bath facility, miss it terribly, especially in the winter after compulsory golf matches. Naw, my Mrs is a filthy cow and stands ankle deep in the shower until I clear it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 1 minute ago, IronJambo said: Naw, my Mrs is a filthy cow and stands ankle deep in the shower until I clear it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tazio Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 People seem to be confusing a bath with a way of getting clean. It's not, it's a way to relax and wind down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OBE Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 15 hours ago, IronJambo said: Naw, my Mrs is a filthy cow and stands ankle deep in the shower until I clear it A cleaning schedule would prevent any build up of blockage matter. Your filthy cow needn't be standing ankle deep in backed up waste water. Sort your gaff out man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IronJambo Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 1 hour ago, Old Blue Eyes said: A cleaning schedule would prevent any build up of blockage matter. Your filthy cow needn't be standing ankle deep in backed up waste water. Sort your gaff out man. It's been fine recently whilst I've been off sick. When I'm back at work covering every hour of the day in shifts the the struggle is real. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 12 hours ago, Tazio said: People seem to be confusing a bath with a way of getting clean. It's not, it's a way to relax and wind down. This. A relaxing bath is great and then follow it up with a shower. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Future's Maroon Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 (edited) This will definitely been mentioned already, but it has been reignited in my life with a new 'person' running the local corner shop. Going in a shop and some ignorant twat using their phone, its bad enough a customer doing this but in my case it's the cretin behind the counter sitting on his fat arse with one hand on his phone on FaceTime with some prick from whatever country (also with volume at a level no other phone has as it's so loud). He then makes me repeat myself several times as he isn't paying attention to what I have asked for...or gives me the wrong thing altogether. I actually walked out the shop this morning in such a rage when I had to repeat myself three times. Gets right on my wick this, as mentioned seeing customers doing this is bad enough. Edited February 13, 2018 by The Future's Maroon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whodanny Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 On 2/9/2018 at 11:28, Horatio Caine said: Advert breaks that seem to last longer than the bloody programme you're watching. And the fecking volume leaps up by about double when they come on. Usually waking me up from a nice snooze. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Potter Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 25 minutes ago, whodanny said: And the fecking volume leaps up by about double when they come on. Usually waking me up from a nice snooze. Aye they think by turning it up we will hear it, maybe but its my cue to turn over, one day there will be no adverts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 3 minutes ago, Harry Potter said: Aye they think by turning it up we will hear it, maybe but its my cue to turn over, one day there will be no adverts. You watch the telly in your bed Harold? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whodanny Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 3 hours ago, Harry Potter said: Aye they think by turning it up we will hear it, maybe but its my cue to turn over, one day there will be no adverts. I usually switch over or hit the mute button during the ads, really can't stand them. Adverts are more likely to make me NOT buy the product being pushed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Caine Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 16 minutes ago, whodanny said: I usually switch over or hit the mute button during the ads, really can't stand them. Adverts are more likely to make me NOT buy the product being pushed. Aye that and feckin trailers that get repeated over and over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whodanny Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 1 minute ago, Horatio Caine said: Aye that and feckin trailers that get repeated over and over. That current Winter Olympics one about it being a "day at the office" really boiling my piss the now. We know it's on, but that would make me want to avoid BBC coverage. Same with the build up to Elise Christie's race on tonights highlights. Just show us the feckin' race !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 21 hours ago, Tazio said: People seem to be confusing a bath with a way of getting clean. It's not, it's a way to relax and wind down. When I called them shite I wasn't thinking of their use as a cleaning method. They're just shite. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 On adverts being louder... http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/7388473.stm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3fingersreid Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 9 hours ago, The Future's Maroon said: This will definitely been mentioned already, but it has been reignited in my life with a new 'person' running the local corner shop. Going in a shop and some ignorant twat using their phone, its bad enough a customer doing this but in my case it's the cretin behind the counter sitting on his fat arse with one hand on his phone on FaceTime with some prick from whatever country (also with volume at a level no other phone has as it's so loud). He then makes me repeat myself several times as he isn't paying attention to what I have asked for...or gives me the wrong thing altogether. I actually walked out the shop this morning in such a rage when I had to repeat myself three times. Gets right on my wick this, as mentioned seeing customers doing this is bad enough. They also usually finish off by putting any change you’re due on the counter rather than handing it back to you the same way you gave them the money . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Future's Maroon Posted February 13, 2018 Share Posted February 13, 2018 15 minutes ago, 3fingersreid said: They also usually finish off by putting any change you’re due on the counter rather than handing it back to you the same way you gave them the money . I got barred from my local corner shop after he done that once, I may have been in the wrong for overreacting but grrrrr, it riled me at the time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Potter Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 10 hours ago, whodanny said: I usually switch over or hit the mute button during the ads, really can't stand them. Adverts are more likely to make me NOT buy the product being pushed. See that No No razor advert is doing the rounds again, mind you if it cuts down on burds wi a tash Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Potter Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 14 hours ago, Morgan said: You watch the telly in your bed Harold? aye Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helzibob Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 People who put their towels on sun beds and then never actually come and lie on them. Or groups that take 8 beds but only 3 people ever lie there over the course of the day, does my head in! ?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helzibob Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 4 minutes ago, jonnothejambo said: In my younger and more fiery youth there were people who did that at our hotel pool in San Antonio. Their towels ended up in the pool. It didn't happen again. That’s an idea ?. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IronJambo Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 1 hour ago, Helzibob said: People who put their towels on sun beds and then never actually come and lie on them. Or groups that take 8 beds but only 3 people ever lie there over the course of the day, does my head in! ?? Sunbathing is rank. I don't get it. Just sit in your living room in your pants with the heating full up instead. Then there's beaches. Sand stuck on your boaby under your foreskin. Naw. Just naw. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Konrad von Carstein Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 4 minutes ago, IronJambo said: Sunbathing is rank. I don't get it. Just sit in your living room in your pants with the heating full up instead. Then there's beaches. Sand stuck on your boaby under your foreskin. Naw. Just naw. WTF are you doing when sunbathing to get sand under your 4skin you utter deviant? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 8 minutes ago, IronJambo said: Sunbathing is rank. I don't get it. Just sit in your living room in your pants with the heating full up instead. Then there's beaches. Sand stuck on your boaby under your foreskin. Naw. Just naw. How the feck did you get sand there? Up yer erky maybe, but not there.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Der Kaiser Posted February 14, 2018 Share Posted February 14, 2018 3 hours ago, jonnothejambo said: In my younger and more fiery youth there were people who did that at our hotel pool in San Antonio. Their towels ended up in the pool. It didn't happen again. My old man swears by this. Pretty sure he sets an early alarm just so he can throw the towels in the pool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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