K1874M Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 leave it until tommorow. Rearranging today would be far to keen. Nah...... it was being keen that got him where he is. We want results now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Nah...... it was being keen that got him where he is. We want results now. to be honest texting her tomorrow is being keen. texting her right now is just abit stalkerish. play it cool D&C! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1874M Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 to be honest texting her tomorrow is being keen. texting her right now is just abit stalkerish. play it cool D&C! haha...... but would fit right in with running a full commentary of events on a football fans forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redjambo Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 to be honest texting her tomorrow is being keen. texting her right now is just abit stalkerish. play it cool D&C! Wise advice from Picard's forehead. To be honest, the "my gran is ill" excuse sounds as suspicious as a three pound note, but hey, the whole aim of the game here is not to trust her, it's to play a round or three of "Colonel wobbly hides his helmet". And, there is of course a possibility that she's being genuine. So, commiserate with her and tell her you'll text later in the week, wait a few days and do so. Don't give up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boof Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Tell her you're a doctor and will take a look at her gran. Then, if gran's still a bit of a looker, you could mark the bird down as possible long-term material. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boof Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 In fact you could pump gran... ...for information, you clarty-minded bassas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beats Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 This is very dissapointing news.I was looking forward to tonight. Get her number up here we will sort it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PapaShango Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Sounds like she has been rammed at the weekend and is moving onto someone who acually has a set of ball instead of prancing around the subject of rifling her! Sorry to say D&C but I think you've been blown out (and not in the way you hoped)!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CraigSN1 Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 I like the fact at first everyone was ripping the pish, now people are actually trying to help the lad. Only on JKB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boab Mugabe Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Just had a text from the bint saying that her gran is unwell and she is unable to make tonight. Likely story. So all in all I've made an arse of myself. Especially giving a running commentary of all the events on the internet! She said on the text that we could meet at the weekend. No thanks love. Number getting deleted for good. Back to the drawing board! Links please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miller Jambo 60 Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Links please. Puts life in to perspective. Left tyne on sat , happy with the draw, knowing or hoping that Dand C would get his nat king the night. Gutted man,im gutted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Generic Username Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 What D&C needs to do is stop acting like he's got ovaries, untuck his wee banger from between his legs and get back out there, making sure to find a dame with a quim so dirty that it resembles the 2p before it gets dooked in cillit bang to restore it. Man up you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miller Jambo 60 Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 What D&C needs to do is stop acting like he's got ovaries, untuck his wee banger from between his legs and get back out there, making sure to find a dame with a quim so dirty that it resembles the 2p before it gets dooked in cillit bang to restore it. Man up you. You have a way with words. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stupid Sexy Flanders Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 ... taking her home and butchering her squidger. "Colonel wobbly hides his helmet". Absolutely magnificent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Spacey Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Absolutely magnificent. That's exactly what i was going to post after reading the last page. Keep faith D&C, it aint over yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goose Baxter Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 GET HER GRAN PUMPED!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Spacey Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 GET HER GRAN PUMPED!!! Need to find out if the grans a G.I.L.F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johanes de Silentio Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 just as i thought....she is probably still sore from the pumping she took from the guy she met on sat night:10900: Word. She wants you to fight for her - I say get her the **** away tae buggery! I feel that a great sadness has entered into our lives! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johanes de Silentio Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tj9JUKqVG_k Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan_R Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Cheers Scott. I still have the number in my phone. I'll leave till later in the week and see if she fancys the weekend. Just hate the thought of her trying to take the pish out of me. Dont leave it till the weekend!!! 1- she'll want to be with her mates 2- giving the competition even more opportunity to get her pumped before you! End of this week. you can do it d/c Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seats Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 You have to laugh at the whole of JKB turning into Barlowesque love machines dishing out advice and criticism left right and centre like they have never failed or been a bit nervous about a bird before! You stick with it D&C and it'll pay dividends in the long run Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckandcover Posted December 14, 2009 Author Share Posted December 14, 2009 Just say she is telling the truth and I meet her at the weekend. It'll be 2 weeks since I met her and spent less than 2 hours in her company. Surely it would be pretty awkward going and meeting a practical stranger? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaka Demus & pliers Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Just say she is telling the truth and I meet her at the weekend. It'll be 2 weeks since I met her and spent less than 2 hours in her company. Surely it would be pretty awkward going and meeting a practical stranger? I despair!! Course it will but you talk to her, get to know each other, have a few drinks then you'll have forgotten all about how awkward it was at first when her ankles are at your ears!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redjambo Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Just say she is telling the truth and I meet her at the weekend. It'll be 2 weeks since I met her and spent less than 2 hours in her company. Surely it would be pretty awkward going and meeting a practical stranger? Our collective patience may start to grow thin... Why would it be awkward? What's the worst that could happen? If you liked her enough to stick your tongue down her throat when you'd only just met her, I think you can cope with meeting her again after two weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckandcover Posted December 14, 2009 Author Share Posted December 14, 2009 Haha sorry lads. Lack a bit of confidence when it comes to girls. As you've probably noticed! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markie Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Just say she is telling the truth and I meet her at the weekend. It'll be 2 weeks since I met her and spent less than 2 hours in her company. Surely it would be pretty awkward going and meeting a practical stranger? That's part of the experience pal, just remember that she has spent the same amount of time with you as you have with her (obviously!) And if she is ****ing rank, stick with it to get your hole anyway and report back to us! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Generic Username Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Haha sorry lads. Lack a bit of confidence when it comes to girls. As you've probably noticed! That'll be code for; Absolutely nae experience with women. It's probably a good thing you don't meet her, if she got her tuppance out you'd probably think it was some rubbery cash point and stick your bank card in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Spacey Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 That'll be code for; Absolutely nae experience with women. It's probably a good thing you don't meet her, if she got her tuppance out you'd probably think it was some rubbery cash point and stick your bank card in it. Brings a new meaning to the phrase "hole in the wall" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbo1874 Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 That'll be code for; Absolutely nae experience with women. It's probably a good thing you don't meet her, if she got her tuppance out you'd probably think it was some rubbery cash point and stick your bank card in it. thats the way,build the lads confidence up:2thumbsup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redjambo Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 That'll be code for; Absolutely nae experience with women. It's probably a good thing you don't meet her, if she got her tuppance out you'd probably think it was some rubbery cash point and stick your bank card in it. We all have to start somewhere. And anyway, the smell that would be attached to the bank card afterwards would make getting money out of cash dispensers much more pleasurable for a wee while... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miller Jambo 60 Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 That'll be code for; Absolutely nae experience with women. It's probably a good thing you don't meet her, if she got her tuppance out you'd probably think it was some rubbery cash point and stick your bank card in it. Thats not fair, this lad is under our wing. Remember that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiberius Stinkfinger Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Thats not fair, this lad is under our wing.Remember that. Too true Doug. There is a lot of pish advice on here for the lad that may ruin our chances of getting this pretty wee thing porked. Be patient D&C and give it a day or 2 before you send a few txts asking how her Granny is feeling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The White Cockade Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 maybe try the Laughing Duck next time mate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Creepy Lurker Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Tell her your special medicine will make her gran get better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaka Demus & pliers Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Haha sorry lads. Lack a bit of confidence when it comes to girls. As you've probably noticed! Well the only way you will gain any is by spending more time in their company so make sure you get a new date sorted. I hope you sent a sympathetic text back (doesn't matter if its a lie or not, you have to at least pretend to believe it!) when you heard about her gran or you may already be donald ducked with this particular 'lady'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Generic Username Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Too true Doug. There is a lot of pish advice on here for the lad that may ruin our chances of getting this pretty wee thing porked. Be patient D&C and give it a day or 2 before you send a few txts asking how her Granny is feeling. Acey's given me good odd's on the granny having kacked it by the time he texts her again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Creepy Lurker Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Think you're jumping the gun here, guys. She was (probably) quite young and on a night out in Karma, her granny's probably about 28. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The People's Chimp Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Acey's given me good odd's on the granny having kacked it by the time he texts her again. She'll be pushing on for another decade at least after that particular tipster started giving out odds... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I P Knightley Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 That'll be code for; Absolutely nae experience with women. It's probably a good thing you don't meet her, if she got her tuppance out you'd probably think it was some rubbery cash point and stick your bank card in it. I think that was abundantly clear the moment he suggested (on another thread) that he should hook up with I8 to go out on the pull. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DETTY29 Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Too true Doug. There is a lot of pish advice on here for the lad that may ruin our chances of getting this pretty wee thing porked. Be patient D&C and give it a day or 2 before you send a few txts asking how her Granny is feeling. Meantime get yourself round to a mates house who has a cracking sister, feeling all sorry for yourself, telling her that you wish you weren't so hopeless with girls, you think you've blown it, what have I done wrong and so on..... Maybe, just maybe you might get a friends sympathy sh@g. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Acey's given me good odd's on the granny having kacked it by the time he texts her again. I wonder if he will give me odds on a double of that and the girl hes trying to pump being a fecking heffer. PS. This thread has made me fall in love with JKB again. well played everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H J Simpson Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 D&C, this may be a blessing in disguse for 2 reasons. 1. Delay your date till after Xmas, that way you won't be involved in the problem of a christmas prsent. Is it to soon to buy her underwear / If I get her something small will she think I'm cheap etc. 2. If the Gran doesn't pull through, I suggest a first date at the funeral, followed by drinks and dancing at the wake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goose Baxter Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 Could look at it as the opertunity for some potential sex for the next couple off weeks/months mate! I wouldnt give up, listen to what people are telling you and i am sure getting your jam roll wont be a problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Old Tolbooth Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 D&C, this may be a blessing in disguse for 2 reasons. 1. Delay your date till after Xmas, that way you won't be involved in the problem of a christmas prsent. Is it to soon to buy her underwear / If I get her something small will she think I'm cheap etc. 2. If the Gran doesn't pull through, I suggest a first date at the funeral, followed by drinks and dancing at the wake. Good idea mate, she would be wearing black too which hides the rolls of fat better! Also, find out when her birthday is somehow, if it's in January then give it a further 4 weeks and you've saved yourself a double hit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scott_jambo Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 D&C, this may be a blessing in disguse for 2 reasons. 1. Delay your date till after Xmas, that way you won't be involved in the problem of a christmas prsent. Is it to soon to buy her underwear / If I get her something small will she think I'm cheap etc. 2. If the Gran doesn't pull through, I suggest a first date at the funeral, followed by drinks and dancing at the wake. Ignore this. She will be reverse cowboying someone else in scrubbers if you dont meet her this weekend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PapaShango Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 I agree with John, my burds birthday is January and it isn a nightmare, they don't accept being fobbed off with the xmas / birthday present being as one! Get her pumped at the grans funeral. You will also get to see if her mum is a MILF. If she is get her pumped too and you are on for the 'treble'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Old Tolbooth Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 I agree with John, my burds birthday is January and it isn a nightmare, they don't accept being fobbed off with the xmas / birthday present being as one! Get her pumped at the grans funeral. You will also get to see if her mum is a MILF. If she is get her pumped too and you are on for the 'treble'. But the granny would be deid! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1874M Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 I agree with John, my burds birthday is January and it isn a nightmare, they don't accept being fobbed off with the xmas / birthday present being as one! Get her pumped at the grans funeral. You will also get to see if her mum is a MILF. If she is get her pumped too and you are on for the 'treble'. Surely only the gran could make treble... that would be si... Infact, get the treble, the gran could be ok to practise positions on with out getting embarrassed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Old Tolbooth Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 Surely only the gran could make treble... that would be si... Infact, get the treble, the gran could be ok to practise positions on with out getting embarrassed. With a bit luck she'd still have a bit warmth left in her too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marshallschunkychicken Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 In many ways, I kind of hope the girl in question HAS been reading this thread.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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