H J Simpson Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 My advice, for whats it's worth would be to do the following: Go there next week by yourself and wander about all night till you see her. Then walk up and have it out with her in front of her mates. Tell her you were heartbroken that she never returned your text and you were hoping it was just cause she dropped her mobile in the bath (as she was distracted thinking about you) and it damaged the sim card so she lost your number. Tell her how you love her and that the fact it took 3 days to get the fishy smell off your fingers hasn't put you off. And then log on and let us know how it went. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gambo Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Exactly how I met my girlfriend almost two years ago. Grow a pair and call her! When I say girlfriend its actually ex as of 30 mins ago. What, did she get a phone call from some bloke that she danced with? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Homme Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 What, did she get a phone call from some bloke that she danced with? The poor lassie is torn! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1874M Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 The bath was probably needed to empty all the muck she collected from the other boys she met that night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starsky Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 What, did she get a phone call from some bloke that she danced with? she was in the bath when she binned him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamboelite Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 The poor lassie is torn! It was Natalie Imbruglia geezus she is fit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pistol1874 Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 The poor lassie is torn! To be fair that in itself is likely to put her off for a wee while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossthejambo Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 The bath was probably needed to empty all the muck she collected from the other boys she met that night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H.A.N.S Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 At that Karma Nights that used to be Subway. Its quite decent now. And she wouldn't let you belt her there and then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_ Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Maybe txt you later is just how she finished off the text. Text her back with at least one question to ensure a response. Then send a pic of your ****** and if she doesn't respond, call her, no escape that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eckauskas Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Call her repeatedly until she answers. If she doesn't answer, withhold your number, then try again. She'll never catch on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markie Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 she was in the bath when she binned him I binned her you cheeky *******! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CostaJambo Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Text her and ask if her boyfriend nicked your Nicola jacket while she distracted you by sucking your face. That's bound to get the conversation started. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Spacey Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 big opportunity missed she admits an attraction to you then tells you she is about to get naked, what do you do ? wait on her getting out the bath !! Exactly what i was thinking, o dear o dear Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theshed Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 An update. Text her last night with the usual pish, how you doing? Good night on Sat? Etc. She said she was going for a bath and would text me later. Still waiting. you should have asked her is she was going to shave her pu*** when she was in the bath and to send you a photo of the end product. if she doesnt text back then just bombard her with pics of your ******:10900: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bishop1874 Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 That place is super rough! If you didn't get her ploughed on Saturday she is probably a lesbian. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Generic Username Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Find out where she lives, break into her gaff while she's asleep, tip toe into her room, get your banger out and rub it on her face. If she wakes up - punch her back door into a billion bits. Sorted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 I reckon D&C might be the type of person to post in here... http://edinburgh.gumtree.com/edinburgh/missed-connections_534_1.html Classic Glasgow post... http://glasgow.gumtree.com/glasgow/78/47003278.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adi Dassler Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 I reckon D&C might be the type of person to post in here... http://edinburgh.gumtree.com/edinburgh/missed-connections_534_1.html Classic Glasgow post... http://glasgow.gumtree.com/glasgow/78/47003278.html Pawn Shop. Westside Plaza. Tidy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan_R Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 GET THIS IN THE CLASSICS! I've just spent about 15mins reading through and pishing myself laughing. Truely hilarious thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geoff Kilpatrick Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 This thread is gold! I'm in shock our resident knicker sniffer hasn't offered his advice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H.A.N.S Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 She out the bath yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johanes de Silentio Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 She out the bath yet? There's no bath - she's riddled - he's being ignored by an itchy hoor whae doesnae wash! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbo1874 Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 my partner who doesnt get jkb at all,she was having a look about and came across this thread.even she said that it was a top read.has D&C done a Pete? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Winstone Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Has she drowned in the bath? I want the next instalment of this gripping tale. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markie Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Has she drowned in the bath? I want the next instalment of this gripping tale. It's definitely better than that Eastenders pish! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beats Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Come on tell us more.FFS don't delete her number. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckandcover Posted December 8, 2009 Author Share Posted December 8, 2009 Still no text. As a good friend once said to me "as long as I have a hole in my arse I'll never understand women" wise words indeed. I don't want to look like a crawler so the numbers been deleted. I'm sorry I've disappointed some people with this somewhat boring conclusion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beats Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Still no text. As a good friend once said to me "as long as I have a hole in my arse I'll never understand women" wise words indeed. I don't want to look like a crawler so the numbers been deleted. I'm sorry I've disappointed some people with this somewhat boring conclusion. Do you have a contract phone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H.A.N.S Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Still no text. As a good friend once said to me "as long as I have a hole in my arse I'll never understand women" wise words indeed. I don't want to look like a crawler so the numbers been deleted. I'm sorry I've disappointed some people with this somewhat boring conclusion. Still a nice heads up for the JKB faithful, if you come across this little bint in Karma don't waste your credit on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redjambo Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Still no text. As a good friend once said to me "as long as I have a hole in my arse I'll never understand women" wise words indeed. I don't want to look like a crawler so the numbers been deleted. I'm sorry I've disappointed some people with this somewhat boring conclusion. Don't give up so easily! If your mobile phone has a log, and you haven't cleared it, then the number will still be in there. Go retrieve it then come back and we'll tell you what to say... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJGJ Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Just got out the bath -- thought I 'd just had a wonderful relaxing time with the woman in my life only to find this thread. I wondered where she'd gone for a short while -- texting some other guy she snogged at the weekend !!! Now I'll have to have a word with her................................ but only after tonight as I think I'm on a winner -- something has stirred her up ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Mighty Thor Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Still no text. As a good friend once said to me "as long as I have a hole in my arse I'll never understand women" wise words indeed. I don't want to look like a crawler so the numbers been deleted. I'm sorry I've disappointed some people with this somewhat boring conclusion. There's got to be a moral to the story........... If you're going to get an expensive jacket chevved in a ropey Edinburgh nightspot then at least get the end of it wet? A sobering tale at this time of year of where alcohol reduced inhibitions can leave you. Stay safe kids! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redjambo Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Still no text. As a good friend once said to me "as long as I have a hole in my arse I'll never understand women" wise words indeed. I don't want to look like a crawler so the numbers been deleted. I'm sorry I've disappointed some people with this somewhat boring conclusion. Wise words my arse. Your friend may be right, but the reality is that you don't NEED to understand women (in fact you never will). As soon as you think you understand a woman then she'll go and do something completely crazy and illogical. That's just how they are. If you try and understand them you'll just end up with a melted brain. Just enjoy their company, without trying to understand them and you'll find it's much more fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markie Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Wise words my arse. Your friend may be right, but the reality is that you don't NEED to understand women (in fact you never will). As soon as you think you understand a woman then she'll go and do something completely crazy and illogical. That's just how they are. If you try and understand them you'll just end up with a melted brain. Just enjoy their company, without trying to understand them and you'll find it's much more fun. you forgot the most important part GET THEM PUMPED at every opportunity! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beats Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 I reckon D&C might be the type of person to post in here... http://edinburgh.gumtree.com/edinburgh/missed-connections_534_1.html Classic Glasgow post... http://glasgow.gumtree.com/glasgow/78/47003278.html That Glasgow one is class.But it dates 11th Oct.Was it you that posted it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 That Glasgow one is class.But it dates 11th Oct.Was it you that posted it Ha ha! No, it wasn't. I have far too much spare time at work just now and reading the weird posts on there is one of the ways I keep myself amused. That one stuck in the mind! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beats Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Ha ha! No, it wasn't. I have far too much spare time at work just now and reading the weird posts on there is one of the ways I keep myself amused. That one stuck in the mind! Lol i believe you mate:curtain: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johanes de Silentio Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Still no text. As a good friend once said to me "as long as I have a hole in my arse I'll never understand women" wise words indeed. I don't want to look like a crawler so the numbers been deleted. I'm sorry I've disappointed some people with this somewhat boring conclusion. Not so fast, mate - this is NOT over! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1874M Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 You still have the number, check sent items and it will be in there. Now the plan. You gotta think smart.... My guess is her attention is easy to get, you don't have to go mental to make her think "this boys different, not like the other boys..." You want her to hink that, trust me.... 40 years pulling birds around the world has taught me a thing or two... What would work imo is; Write her name in on your bedroom wall with your own shight and take a picture of it, with you standing next to it looking as happy as larry. That should work, if not we move on to plan B. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geoff Kilpatrick Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 You still have the number, check sent items and it will be in there. Now the plan. You gotta think smart.... My guess is her attention is easy to get, you don't have to go mental to make her think "this boys different, not like the other boys..." You want her to hink that, trust me.... 40 years pulling birds around the world has taught me a thing or two... What would work imo is; Write her name in on your bedroom wall with your own shight and take a picture of it, with you standing next to it looking as happy as larry. That should work, if not we move on to plan B. :rofl: Or she could think Bobby Sands has been reincarnated!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goose Baxter Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 This sounds like a show for Jeremy Kyle, Write into him about some bint who hasnt bothered to text you back!! tell him you are broken hearted!! Defo think you should go back to the place this weekend and see if she is there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pistol1874 Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 :rofl: Or she could think Bobby Sands has been reincarnated!! That's it! Offer to take her out for a chicken supper! who could refuse such an offer? Well, apart from Bobby of course... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markie Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 There should be a JKB night out to scrubbers (or whatever its called) this weekend so we can find this lassie and tell her to text the poor lad back! The best way of finding her will be asking all the slappers (sorry girls) if they have had a bath in the last week. That's a plan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
londonjambo Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 I reckon D&C might be the type of person to post in here... http://edinburgh.gumtree.com/edinburgh/missed-connections_534_1.html Hi we met in the club on Saturday night.We had a lovely night and exchanged phone numbers.I have tried to text you but i must have the wrong number as you haven't replied.You will remember me you got me to ask the DJ to play It Must be love for us and we danced for a few songs.Incase you still don't remember me i was the guy who left his Nicolefarhi coat and it was nicked.No sweat as you pointed out at the time it was fake anyway lol. Anyway if this is you please contact me as i would love to hear from you and arrange a date for this weekend either at Karma or Lava. I seem to rememeber you mentioned a party this Fri and i would be up for going if the offer is still there. Hope to hear from you soon Your little duck Dwayne xxx Ps sorry about the catch a goat you've pulled chat up line! Come on, own up ... which JKB wit posted this on there ? Unless of course it was ... It wouldnt surprise me in the slightest if some other JKB wit sent a spoof reply - surely that could never happen ... GC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckandcover Posted December 9, 2009 Author Share Posted December 9, 2009 Who the **** done that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H J Simpson Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Maybe the reason she never replied to the text is cause she reads / posts on JKB and is mortified by this thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theshed Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 well as you know by now she aint interested so find her number in your phone and put it up on here and iam sure there will one or two people who would drop her a text and the odd naked photo mess:10900: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckandcover Posted December 9, 2009 Author Share Posted December 9, 2009 Maybe the reason she never replied to the text is cause she reads / posts on JKB and is mortified by this thread Knowing my luck I wouldn't be surprise me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scott_jambo Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Who the **** done that! Come on, own up. We know it was you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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