Riddley Walker Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 The Shed was voyueristic As Salad's fingers twisted Into a shape That hands do make When Bishy girls get fisted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 The Shed was voyueristic As Salad's fingers twisted Into a shape That hands do make When Bishy girls get fisted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auldy19 Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Laughed my nut off all the way through this last night ! Did enjoy how at the start salad fingers came across as a man with morals worried about breaking a burds heart. Only to turn into an alley cat over night and post his sexual exploits across Kickback for our entertainment ! As a current user of the online dating scene I tip my cap to you good sir !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paolo Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 I need to get myself involved in this shit. Any port in a storm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chester copperpot Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 I need to get myself involved in this shit. Any port in a storm. Plenty of fish is literally like shooting fish in a barrel. When I first split with the Mrs I was in serious need of my hole. If I had put that though, no one would've come near me so went for the sensative type who wouldn't consider dating someone who wasn't cool with me having my kids every weekend. I got swamped with offers from birds despite me not being the most handsome of chaps. It was a golden time as all these girls looking for a serious relationship and who promised that they were in it for the long haul and wouldnt sleep with a guy on the first date had their kegs at their ankles after a couple of g&t's. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Plenty of fish is literally like shooting fish in a barrel. When I first split with the Mrs I was in serious need of my hole. If I had put that though, no one would've come near me so went for the sensative type who wouldn't consider dating someone who wasn't cool with me having my kids every weekend. I got swamped with offers from birds despite me not being the most handsome of chaps. It was a golden time as all these girls looking for a serious relationship and who promised that they were in it for the long haul and wouldnt sleep with a guy on the first date had their kegs at their ankles after a couple of g&t's. Kegs at their ankles :clap: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 (edited) Be carefull if a burd from Nottingham takes an interest. Edited August 16, 2016 by Dawnrazor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paolo Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Kegs at their ankles :clap: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Governor Tarkin Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 The Shed was voyueristic As Salad's fingers twisted Into a shape That hands do make When Bishy girls get fisted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riddley Walker Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 And poor old Chester was hurt As Salad logged on to blurt That for the last four nights His frigid ex-wife Was now a complete piece of dirt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 And poor old Chester was hurt As Salad logged on to blurt That for the last four nights His frigid ex-wife Was now a complete piece of dirt Getting better these poems Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auldy19 Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Plenty of fish is literally like shooting fish in a barrel. When I first split with the Mrs I was in serious need of my hole. If I had put that though, no one would've come near me so went for the sensative type who wouldn't consider dating someone who wasn't cool with me having my kids every weekend. I got swamped with offers from birds despite me not being the most handsome of chaps. It was a golden time as all these girls looking for a serious relationship and who promised that they were in it for the long haul and wouldnt sleep with a guy on the first date had their kegs at their ankles after a couple of g&t's. When I was about 23/24 I used zoosk back when it was free to some success . No Facebook anymore so tinder is out . Can't be arsed setting up a profile purely for it . So it's just POF . Your no one of these guys that sends a d*ck pic as soon as numbers are exchanged that are the lassies are complaining about ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Gin Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Has Salad been back on since hooking up with this wench again last night, or is he now locked up in a bedroom somewhere, like in that film, Misery? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Jarman Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Here Salad. It's her you should be blanking no us. What's the script? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chester copperpot Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 When I was about 23/24 I used zoosk back when it was free to some success . No Facebook anymore so tinder is out . Can't be arsed setting up a profile purely for it . So it's just POF . Your no one of these guys that sends a d*ck pic as soon as numbers are exchanged that are the lassies are complaining about ? Na, I dont have a zoom in function on my phone to do this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Салатные палочки Posted August 16, 2016 Author Share Posted August 16, 2016 Still alive lads. She wanted to meet up again tomorrow night but I have had to make some excuses until at least the weekend. She needs to cool it. Nice lass, potential to get a bit heavy (no pun intended btw) I think. Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Jarman Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Good man. Gives her a night off to browse some wedding magazines. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Still alive lads. She wanted to meet up again tomorrow night but I have had to make some excuses until at least the weekend. She needs to cool it. Nice lass, potential to get a bit heavy (no pun intended btw) I think. Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk Gums roond yer plums yet? Honestly, you stirred up a hornets nest here so..JKB needs to know the whole (hole?) story. Don't be shy. You're obviously not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Good man. Gives her a night off to browse some wedding magazines. Leave him alone will you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ivan Drago Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Good man. Gives her a night off to browse some wedding magazines. Hopefully working on her steak pie recipe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riddley Walker Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 (edited) Still alive lads. She wanted to meet up again tomorrow night but I have had to make some excuses until at least the weekend. She needs to cool it. Nice lass, potential to get a bit heavy (no pun intended btw) I think. Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk ^^^^^^^"She brought her toothbrush over and every time I build up the courage to tell her to piss off she gives me a gam." Edited August 16, 2016 by Riddley Walker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 (edited) ^^^^^^^ "She brought her toothbrush over and every time I build up the courage to tell her to piss off she gives me a gam." Too much. See when he marries her, will he confess to this thread? Nah, thought not. Edited August 16, 2016 by Morgan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chester copperpot Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Good man. Gives her a night off to browse some wedding magazines. Whether salad likes it or not, she has already updated her fb status to in a relationship and is dreaming of having his babies Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Whether salad likes it or not, she has already updated her fb status to in a relationship and is dreaming of having his babies When she could have had yours? Aw. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Salads FB states: It's complicated. ******* FB states: Ah love him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Jarman Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Whether salad likes it or not, she has already updated her fb status to in a relationship and is dreaming of having his babies Bragging to all the girls at work she's found 'The One' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Bragging to all the girls at work she's found 'The One' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chester copperpot Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 When she could have had yours? Aw. She did. 2 of them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wibble Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 I have a feeling half of this thread will end up in Irvine Welshs next novel. Sent from my SM-G928I using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tweegy Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Bragging to all the girls at work she's found 'The One' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OTT Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Currently attempting online dating at the moment. Its ****ing horrible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auldy19 Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Currently attempting online dating at the moment. Its ******* horrible. Chat shit.....get banged!! It's easy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
¼½¾ Posted August 16, 2016 Share Posted August 16, 2016 Currently attempting online dating at the moment. Its ******* horrible. You need a good steak pie recipe. PM Salad, he has the connections. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 (edited) apparently, any spare time he has is being spent in Argos looking lovingly for rings, Salad Fingers and his laminated book of dreams Edited August 17, 2016 by Dawnrazor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Shin Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 Has Salad been back on since hooking up with this wench again last night, or is he now locked up in a bedroom somewhere, like in that film, Human Centipede ? ftfy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paolo Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 I have a feeling half of this thread will end up in Irvine Welshs next novel. Sent from my SM-G928I using Tapatalk We have got to the golden shower and shitting stage then? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan_R Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 So many posts... Can someone just clarify that it was steak pie bird that eventually got her pie? Or someone else? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 So many posts... Can someone just clarify that it was steak pie bird that eventually got her pie? Or someone else? Someone else. Who has turned out to be Chester Copperpot's ex. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dumpson Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 F*****g amazing lads, gotta be some of K.B's finest work here !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonesalice34 Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 after such attitude you, guys, complain about girls who want rich men? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riddley Walker Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 after such attitude you, guys, complain about girls who want rich men? Are you from Bishopbriggs by any chance? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 after such attitude you, guys, complain about girls who want rich men? You're not real. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ivan Drago Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 (edited) name="Riddley Walker" post="5553023" timestamp="1471422840"]Are you from Bishopbriggs by any chance? Nah, I reckon this is the steak pie maker Edited August 17, 2016 by Ivan Drago Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Салатные палочки Posted August 17, 2016 Author Share Posted August 17, 2016 Nah, I reckon this is the steak pie maker funny thing is, it looks scarily like one of Steak Pie's drunken texts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Gin Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 after such attitude you, guys, complain about girls who want rich men? 3 posts huh :'> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Jarman Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 This is going to end up like Sweeney Todd Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riddley Walker Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 Joined the board yesterday and chooses this thread to start posting on... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Jarman Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 If you see 'Steak & Salad Pie' in the Tynie kiosks on Saturday don't buy one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbo1874 Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 (edited) Edit,meant to be for Auldy19 If you're no bothered and just want your naggings then PoF If you want your naggings with some burd who thinks she's a cut above the Match. Ultimately you'll get your hole no bother. Also tinder is another. I went around every site with mission to rattle a few from each. It really is that easy. And I'm a ginger BTW to give you some perspective :-) Edited August 17, 2016 by robbo1874 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ivan Drago Posted August 17, 2016 Share Posted August 17, 2016 I hope jonesalice gets back to us. Tracked Salad down to JKB! Shit just got real. Strap yourself in lads, this is going to be good. Note for next time salad, make sure your conquest isn't a Jambo before putting all the filthy details on kickback. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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