depression

[Captain Canada]

At 3 months they'll just be asking how you've been getting on and as the pills have helped you, they'll more than likely just tell you to carry on for another 3 months.

 

I've been on pills a few times but am on monthly phone call check ups this time because of how bad I was when I went back earlier in the year.

 

I've recently cut my dose in half on advice of the GP and I'm a bit concerned about cutting it in half again in a few weeks which has been suggested.

 

I am now out of a very stressful situation I was in at the time of starting the pills again so I'm hoping to be OK when I cut back a lot in the dosage before coming off them again.

[Franco Fascione]

Anyone who thinks they need to talk to a counsellor, and can't seem to get it on the NHS, then try PF Counselling based at Balcarres Street in Morningside.

 

You have to get a GP referral, however, you only pay what you can afford to pay per session from ?5-?40, with the average payment being ?20 I believe, although they don't put you under pressure to fork out more than you can afford. (If you compare this to similar private services it's much less expensive). They will assess you, look to pair you with a suitable counsellor and you have to commit to going every week.

 

If you can find the spare cash it could be the help you need, especially if you feel talking to someone will help. (I have no professional connection to them).

 

Just google PF Counselling Edinburgh for their web site - they even have self help documents on various mental health topics.

[Lavrentiy Beria]

This time every year until January i sink into a deep depression . The feelgood factor of the festive activities make me want to cry . I hope the Hearts winning will at least take my mind of things.

[Der Kaiser]

Ok. Question.

 

I recently had my fluoxetine doubled after my 3 month review. Felt I was plateauing (is that a word) so docs upped it saying it was quite common.

 

Thing is I have a stag doo to go to this weekend. I've never been a big drinker since my student days so was wondering what folks advice/experience are on drinking on these pills.

 

I don't have to get hammered but I'd be interested to hear of others experiences.

Very bad idea/ Manageable / Side effects etc etc.

 

Cheers in advance kickback.

[cashgenerator]

Ok. Question.

 

I recently had my fluoxetine doubled after my 3 month review. Felt I was plateauing (is that a word) so docs upped it saying it was quite common.

 

Thing is I have a stag doo to go to this weekend. I've never been a big drinker since my student days so was wondering what folks advice/experience are on drinking on these pills.

 

I don't have to get hammered but I'd be interested to hear of others experiences.

Very bad idea/ Manageable / Side effects etc etc.

 

Cheers in advance kickback.

I'd probably be asking my GP this rather than KB to be honest! Probably a bit late now though.

[Beverley]

i had no issues at all drinking while on fluoxetine BUT remember taht alcohol is a depressant so you may well end up feeling worse.   i wasn't getting mullered, but i did go out and have a few drinks... i had to force myself to socialise.

 

as i recall, on reading the bumph in the packs, there were possible side effects of nausea and such, but i'd still double check it. 

 

 

as long as you're not out to get blootered, you should be ok though if anything like me.  i did have horrendous side effects when i started the pills as well as when i came off them though

Edited November 21, 2014 by Beverley

[graygo]

Ok. Question.

 

I recently had my fluoxetine doubled after my 3 month review. Felt I was plateauing (is that a word) so docs upped it saying it was quite common.

 

Thing is I have a stag doo to go to this weekend. I've never been a big drinker since my student days so was wondering what folks advice/experience are on drinking on these pills.

 

I don't have to get hammered but I'd be interested to hear of others experiences.

Very bad idea/ Manageable / Side effects etc etc.

 

Cheers in advance kickback.

 

A friend of mine told me that the alcohol will might negate the effect of the Fluoxetine but other than that no problem.

[chester copperpot]

A friend of mine told me that the alcohol will might negate the effect of the Fluoxetine but other than that no problem.

 

 

When I started taking them a few years back and was still drinking it made me feel absolutely shocking the following day.

 

Good luck to all on here, as a massive sufferer I feel you pain brothers and sisters.

[graygo]

When I started taking them a few years back and was still drinking it made me feel absolutely shocking the following day.

 

Good luck to all on here, as a massive sufferer I feel you pain brothers and sisters.

 

I suppose everyone is different and cashgenerator's advice about asking a doctor s probably the best answer.

[chester copperpot]

I suppose everyone is different and cashgenerator's advice about asking a doctor s probably the best answer.

 

 

Aye mate, the way my brain's wired, I doubt anyone else would be affected the way I was! 

[Rudolf's Mate]

Stayed clear of this thread through fear of posts striking a chord.

 

I think living my weekends throughout my teens on a different planet has a lot to answer for.

 

Circumstances in life haven't helped and looking back I can recall issues dating back to when I was about 13/14 yrs old.

 

My job was fairly high pressured however despite my issues I thrived on it and it was an escape from other realities. I loved my job and I was good at it however I had to give it up to care for my daughter.

 

Ever day is a battle!

[Der Kaiser]

Still alive....actually feel pretty good despite drinking quite a lot....not that I'm in any way endorsing it.

 

My anxiety about it has subsided which is good.

[Dagger Is Back]

Have been a lurker on this thread for quite a while and have a lot of empathy for what folks are going through.

 

Couple of things struck me as I read through folks stories and updates. There is a lot of support out there, and loads of people who want to put themselves out to help in whatever way possible.

 

The second thing is fight it with everything you've got and don't take any shit from people. It's easy to just roll over and let things be.

 

I kinda sail through life and never bother docs but after a year of a hacking bad cough went to the GP - have also been feeling quite low mentally. Got the cough bit sorted and then brought up the feeling low bit.

 

The response was 'You've only got 5 minutes, if you wanted to talk about two things you should have made a double appointment. Now have you ever thought about killing yourself? No? Right here are some good websites to look at and I'll post you a survey'

 

I just walked out with my scrap of paper feeling worse than I did when I walked in.

[Bert Le Clos]

I knew embarrassingly little about depression until reading this thread. Although it sounds unbelievably selfish, I feel incredibly lucky to have never had to deal with it, either directly or indirectly.

 

To those of you suffering, from what I've read each of you is incredibly brave for speaking about what you are going through and I wish all of you the very best.

[JamboHeriot]

When I started on fluoxetine drinking was a horrendous idea, would wake up the next day feeling not only hungover but very suicidal. Also felt suicidal while I was drunk, which actually lead me to attempting it. Now I can happily get bevvied and I'll just feel hungover the next day.

 

To anyone reading who suspects they may be suffering from depression, please get help as soon as possible. It was one of the best decisions of my life, and I'm not sure I'd still be here had I not. I promise you there is a light at the end of the tunnel, from wanting to commit suicide every day and not being able to get out of bed I am almost fully functioning again, and on track to do well in my end of semester exams.

Everybody will have different experiences but since I've almost come out the other side, I've had a new lease of life.

[scott_jambo]

When I started on fluoxetine drinking was a horrendous idea, would wake up the next day feeling not only hungover but very suicidal. Also felt suicidal while I was drunk, which actually lead me to attempting it. Now I can happily get bevvied and I'll just feel hungover the next day.

 

To anyone reading who suspects they may be suffering from depression, please get help as soon as possible. It was one of the best decisions of my life, and I'm not sure I'd still be here had I not. I promise you there is a light at the end of the tunnel, from wanting to commit suicide every day and not being able to get out of bed I am almost fully functioning again, and on track to do well in my end of semester exams.

Everybody will have different experiences but since I've almost come out the other side, I've had a new lease of life.

Wjat doesn't break you makes you stronger etc..

 

Sounds like you are much more resilient. well done.

[Der Kaiser]

My dosage was recently increased and overall I've felt a bit worse? Anyone else experienced this. Might go back to the Docs.

[Ragnar]

My dosage was recently increased and overall I've felt a bit worse? Anyone else experienced this. Might go back to the Docs.

Yes, generally any increase of dosage or change of medication will cause symptoms to re-appear.

 

They should wear off after a while. I was on Citalopram and my medication was increased and I started to feel terrible.

 

The symptoms calmed down after a couple weeks.

[Der Kaiser]

Yes, generally any increase of dosage or change of medication will cause symptoms to re-appear.

 

They should wear off after a while. I was on Citalopram and my medication was increased and I started to feel terrible.

 

The symptoms calmed down after a couple weeks.

This makes me feel better. It's been literally two weeks since so I'll give it another week before thinking about visiting the Docs. Kinda felt the "dark thoughts" seemed to be slipping back in at night and the happy guy who sings in his car on the way to work was missing.....yes I sing in my car......

[boredwaitin]

last few months to a year ive been struggling.my own job problems, peronal problems, wife having a miscarrage, then my wife lost her job few months ago.that was the final straw.my way of dealing with everything has been to drink my self to a state every night where things dont seem so bad(worry about it tomorrow when ive not had a drink).every night 5 pints of stella to deal with things.things have came to a bit of a head recently and cant get any worse.when i go to work i am still the same happy chappy as always hiding everything thats been going on outside work hours so no one knows there is a problem.when asked a question about my private life i lie and say what everyone expects or wants to hear.cant speak to family, bit of friction there as they are all about how well everyone is doing and problems to them are just sob stories/looking for attention this includes my parents, over the last 2 years ive slowly stopped speaking to all my pals, most have moved away  and cant afford my season ticket anymore so lost contact and all nights /days out .even when they have contacted me i dont reply because of the situation im in, dont want to be the person on a night out whos life is s**t listening to how wonderfull everyone else is doing.never been to doctors as  i dont want to be put on tablets or told ive a problem.after the last few weeks, the way ive been treating the only person i do care for ( my wife and my dog ) with my moods i think i need help or i will end up doing something silly and losing everything.any advice welcome thanks

[Tommi smells blood]

You need to find a voice first and foremost, better the guy trying to get a few things off his chest. If you can break it to a friend, they should rally round you and give you everything you need. Most importantly though is your wife, tell her! she's probably in the same boat and blames herself, nobody is to blame when you have a run of bad luck it sometimes happens but it's how you react that makes you. It will more than likely take time but in the long run you can look back and see how far you have come

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Robbo-Jambo]

last few months to a year ive been struggling.my own job problems, peronal problems, wife having a miscarrage, then my wife lost her job few months ago.that was the final straw.my way of dealing with everything has been to drink my self to a state every night where things dont seem so bad(worry about it tomorrow when ive not had a drink).every night 5 pints of stella to deal with things.things have came to a bit of a head recently and cant get any worse.when i go to work i am still the same happy chappy as always hiding everything thats been going on outside work hours so no one knows there is a problem.when asked a question about my private life i lie and say what everyone expects or wants to hear.cant speak to family, bit of friction there as they are all about how well everyone is doing and problems to them are just sob stories/looking for attention this includes my parents, over the last 2 years ive slowly stopped speaking to all my pals, most have moved away  and cant afford my season ticket anymore so lost contact and all nights /days out .even when they have contacted me i dont reply because of the situation im in, dont want to be the person on a night out whos life is s**t listening to how wonderfull everyone else is doing.never been to doctors as  i dont want to be put on tablets or told ive a problem.after the last few weeks, the way ive been treating the only person i do care for ( my wife and my dog ) with my moods i think i need help or i will end up doing something silly and losing everything.any advice welcome thanks

Doctors appt. asap.

 

Sounds like things are coming to a head.

 

Speak to a doctor before they do.

 

You wont regret it. I have been in the same position as you and forced myself to seek medical help.

 

Good luck.

[boredwaitin]

dont want to give her anymore hassle than shes got at the moment, i know shes finding things tough without me giving her more to worry about.been locking myself away last few months so dont feel able to talk to friends as i distanced myself from them.mainly my choice just didnt feel like socialising and coulndnt afford nights out.

[tweegy]

dont want to give her anymore hassle than shes got at the moment, i know shes finding things tough without me giving her more to worry about.been locking myself away last few months so dont feel able to talk to friends as i distanced myself from them.mainly my choice just didnt feel like socialising and coulndnt afford nights out.

If they are friends they will help. Speak to them.

[Sow Easy]

Hi everyone, I tried to make a separate thread about this as it's more about jobs but I wasn't able to so apologies for sticking it in here.

 

I've posted in this thread before about my depression being related to my previous jobs, then my failed attempt at University with the death of 3 family members along the way. Well, I'm now back working in financial services again in a pensions call centre and all those feelings are coming back to me tenfold. I absolutely despise it. It's all encompassing and it just consumes my entire life. I basically come in and go straight to bed and think non stop about having to go back into work the next day. I need out badly but I just can't find anything else outwith financial services.

 

I really don't know what the hell I want to with my life but the more thought I put in I kind want to do something that helps people, like a social worker or something helping kids. Does anyone know how to get into such a line of work?

[scott_jambo]

Can I just give a bit of general advice.to people on this thread.

If you are in any way suffering from depression or feels susceptible to depression. Do not under any circumstances, regardless of your situation, take a  financial services call centre job.

 

The good news is that you can stop beating yourself up.

 

It's not you. It's the job. Your life isn't empty. That job is designed to make you feel empty. The people who do well at these jobs are:

 

1. One of the 0.0001% that enjoy financial service call centre work

2. Are so mentally strong that they can seperate their job totally from their life. The "work to live, not live to work" mentality.

 

If you don't fit into these two categories, you WILL be miserable. 

 

I would suggest radical action. Hand in your notice and spend the 4 week notice period to sign up to recruitment agencies who can find you work maybe within public sector, small company or maybe even some manual work until you can get your head sorted.

 

Things always work themselves out. When you finally leave your job hell, the only regret is that you didn't leave sooner. 

[Sow Easy]

You've got no idea how much I wish I could mate, but I really can't afford to. I'd have done it in a second otherwise.

[The Future's Maroon]

Can I just give a bit of general advice.to people on this thread.

If you are in any way suffering from depression or feels susceptible to depression. Do not under any circumstances, regardless of your situation, take a  financial services call centre job.

 

The good news is that you can stop beating yourself up.

 

It's not you. It's the job. Your life isn't empty. That job is designed to make you feel empty. The people who do well at these jobs are:

 

1. One of the 0.0001% that enjoy financial service call centre work

2. Are so mentally strong that they can seperate their job totally from their life. The "work to live, not live to work" mentality.

 

If you don't fit into these two categories, you WILL be miserable. 

 

I would suggest radical action. Hand in your notice and spend the 4 week notice period to sign up to recruitment agencies who can find you work maybe within public sector, small company or maybe even some manual work until you can get your head sorted.

 

Things always work themselves out. When you finally leave your job hell, the only regret is that you didn't leave sooner. 

So true, I have my own problems...some financial, and my biggest problem was working in the industry....it doesnt help one jott.

 

I have more to add to this (amazing) thread, which I will tomorrow....

 

Even for those just 'looking in', help is available but it just takes courage to ask...whats the worst anyone can say..."no"?!

 

Taught me a lot of lessons that daft wee phrase. 

[michael_bolton]

Can I just give a bit of general advice.to people on this thread.

If you are in any way suffering from depression or feels susceptible to depression. Do not under any circumstances, regardless of your situation, take a  financial services call centre job.

 

The good news is that you can stop beating yourself up.

 

It's not you. It's the job. Your life isn't empty. That job is designed to make you feel empty. The people who do well at these jobs are:

 

1. One of the 0.0001% that enjoy financial service call centre work

2. Are so mentally strong that they can seperate their job totally from their life. The "work to live, not live to work" mentality.

 

If you don't fit into these two categories, you WILL be miserable. 

 

I would suggest radical action. Hand in your notice and spend the 4 week notice period to sign up to recruitment agencies who can find you work maybe within public sector, small company or maybe even some manual work until you can get your head sorted.

 

Things always work themselves out. When you finally leave your job hell, the only regret is that you didn't leave sooner. 

 

The most miserable spell I can remember in my life was a short stint at the HSBC call centre in Hamilton.

 

I mean the kind of miserable where I'd honestly hope to crash the car on the way to work in the morning. Nothing too serious, just a wee bump to get the day off.

 

Awful working environment, terrible, soulless job. I was totally miserable and so were the majority of the people in my team.

 

I realised this after about 3 months and packed it in to return to the tefl. 

 

I agree with the advice above entirely. If you have a job that makes you feel like that, pack it and do something else. 

[Bindy Badgy]

+1 to avoiding call centre work.

 

I've never suffered from depression thank Christ.  However, the 18 months I spent in a call centre was the most miserable period of my life.

 

I'm still in financial services but I'm with a different company and the amount of time spent on the phone is minimal.

[Jabba]

Hey folks, anyone got any experience with valdoxan?

 

I've pretty much always had some issues with depression and anxiety and since moving to Oz in the middle of last year I've felt under a lot of pressure. The last month has been tougher and for the last couple of weeks I've had a lot of sleep problems. Typically only sleeping a few hours then wakening up around 1-2am and getting little or no sleep till morning. Understandably that's making work a lot tougher and if I'm less productive I'm making less money and the cycle worsens.

 

My wife encouraged me to go to the docs tonight and I've been given a months course of valdoxan. I've read a lot about people having more trouble sleeping when they start taking it though. Anyone had any joy with it?

 

Edit: this is my first time taking any sort of anti-depressant. I've always managed to keep things under control before now.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Edited January 12, 2015 by Jabba

[Muppetboy]

Hey folks, anyone got any experience with valdoxan?

I've pretty much always had some issues with depression and anxiety and since moving to Oz in the middle of last year I've felt under a lot of pressure. The last month has been tougher and for the last couple of weeks I've had a lot of sleep problems. Typically only sleeping a few hours then wakening up around 1-2am and getting little or no sleep till morning. Understandably that's making work a lot tougher and if I'm less productive I'm making less money and the cycle worsens.

My wife encouraged me to go to the docs tonight and I've been given a months course of valdoxan. I've read a lot about people having more trouble sleeping when they start taking it though. Anyone had any joy with it?

Edit: this is my first time taking any sort of anti-depressant. I've always managed to keep things under control before now.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I've got ocd and take sertraline, so can't really help with your medication question but in terms of sleep issues the anxiety my ocd creates played havoc with my sleeping which in turn made ocd worse. Got diazepam and it works a treat,take two before bed and bingo.no real after effects next day either apart from slight grogginess. It's very hard to get this drug nowadays though

[Jabba]

I've got ocd and take sertraline, so can't really help with your medication question but in terms of sleep issues the anxiety my ocd creates played havoc with my sleeping which in turn made ocd worse. Got diazepam and it works a treat,take two before bed and bingo.no real after effects next day either apart from slight grogginess. It's very hard to get this drug nowadays though

Aye, the docs here have a sign up saying they don't prescribe them. Doctor only spent a couple mins before battering out the script. Read mixed reviews online, more negative than positive but that's always the way with reviews of any sort.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Muppetboy]

Aye, the docs here have a sign up saying they don't prescribe them. Doctor only spent a couple mins before battering out the script. Read mixed reviews online, more negative than positive but that's always the way with reviews of any sort.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

It was psychiatry that wrote the letter to my doctors so I could get them. Docs scaremongering with stories of Alzheimer's in later life etc. psychiatrists said this was basically bullshit

[Салатные палочки]

Was just looking for this thread earlier.  

 

After a few months of anxiety and some mild depression which came to a head after christmas, my girlfiend finally persuaded me to see the doctor.  Ill be honest this is not the first time I have suffered from it and I have went through stages since I was about 21.  At times I can be anxious for days and it usually peaks with an anxiety/panic attack (the last one being on Hogmany).  Went to the docs on Friday and was prescribed Fluoxetine.  My girlfriend was on anti-depressants after the birth of our daughter and told me about the initial side effects, which worried me so the doctor also prescribed me beta blockers which I have to take three times a day.  Started both of them on Saturday.  Initially I was pretty out of it after the Fluoxetine and felt sleepy and a bit stoned, probably took about an hour for that to pass.  Yesterday was a bit worse, banging sore head along with the sleepiness and generally being a bit out of it.  

 

Obviously the doc has stated that it will take a while for them to take effect but I feel today I am a lot calmer than I have been.  That could well be down to the beta blockers though.   

 

Got the usual patter, lay off the drink etc, which I did this weekend and feel great for that.  Trouble is she has stupidly invited this lassie she met on holiday last year and her man up this weekend and wants to take them out.  Obviously I have to go along but does anyone know if I should stick to the softies or could I have a few beers?  If I have to stick to the softies I think ill stay in, hate listening to drunk people when I'm sober.  

[martoon]

It's been uplifting reading this thread.

 

I've suffered on and off, to varying degrees, since my late teens. Mind altering drugs have a lot to answer for.

 

For 10 years I muddled through. Told no one, not even my GP. Finally broached the subject when I was 29 and the medication I was prescribed (paroxetine) was a revelation. Only needed a 6 month course and the depression was kept at bay thereafter for about 14 years.

 

Unfortunately it came back again in late 2011. It was pretty horrific but this time I didn't hesitate. I was keen to be prescribed the paroxetine again because of it's previous success but, although it certainly helped (as did the 2012 Cup Final), it wasn't as effective as before. GP suggested changing med and he prescribed sertraline, which has worked extremely well. Still taking it now at a lower maintenance level and feel fine.

 

Obviously no expert but please don't suffer in silence as I did. It's a futile waste of valuable time that you could be enjoying. Also, If one med doesn't work you can always try another, and no matter how bad things get, even if you feel you've hit rock bottom, with help and time it will get better and you will come out the other side.

 

Thanks to all who have posted on this thread and given me the confidence to do likewise.

 

PS. I like a beer, in, ahem, moderation, and have experienced no side affects. However, we're all different so probably best to seek proper advice on that matter.

[jim747]

A glimmer of hope maybe?

http://www.ctvnews.ca/health/study-finds-link-between-depression-brain-inflammation-1.2210121

[Boof]

I really don't know what the hell I want to with my life but the more thought I put in I kind want to do something that helps people, like a social worker or something helping kids. Does anyone know how to get into such a line of work?

Have you investigated any kind of volunteering?

 

That might just help break the cycle of work-home-work...

 

Speaking as no kind of expert whatsoever but someone who once had similar feelings about a job.

[chester copperpot]

Just on the topic of work. A lot of my depression stemmed massively from the work that I did. Earning big bucks but with lots of pressure.

 

I now coach football to kids and wouldn't change it for the world, despite the pay being shite relative to what I was earning in banking, however there is no better reward than your health.

 

I also volunteer and get a huge amount of satisfaction from doing it knowing that I am helping others.

[Sharpie]

They just had a day, don't know if its International about depression.  Some well known people who suffer, and particularly one sports personality who suffered for thirty years before admitting to himself he had a problem.  One of the issues seems to be accepting that it is a mental health problem, which lead to the mistake of saying nothing because of the perceived attitude to the stigma of being a mental health problem.  This indivudual sought help and his life is now vastly improved due to medication and understanding.  He made two comments I thought were interesting, he said if you wake up in the morning and not see any reason for joy some time in your day you possibly have a problem, he also said one of the biggest aids he found was to talk, being able to talk to others and express your problems is a great help.

 

A well known hockey coach, 30 years in coaching at all levels said he dealt with many young men who had the problem, he talked with them and that in itself proved to be some help.  Both men stressed the importance of talking.

[stirlingshirejambo]

Just on the topic of work. A lot of my depression stemmed massively from the work that I did. Earning big bucks but with lots of pressure.

 

I now coach football to kids and wouldn't change it for the world, despite the pay being shite relative to what I was earning in banking, however there is no better reward than your health.

 

I also volunteer and get a huge amount of satisfaction from doing it knowing that I am helping others.

Well done mate. Proud of the progress you have made.

Correct about health being far more important than money. Money issues can increase pressure and depression but in my opinion is never the root cause of depression.

[Der Kaiser]

6 months on from starting on fluoxetine and I can honestly say it was one of the best things for me. I just regret not speaking to someone sooner as its contributed to the likely end of my marriage.

 

In a job I love and finally getting made permanent at the start of the year was a huge weight off my shoulders (only took 5 fecking years despite being pressurized into giving up on making it as a teacher ). It does still grind at me that I've accomplished this on pills which I know shouldn't let bother me but it does....even though I feel better and I'm much happier.....don't snap at my kids like I used to.

[Locky]

 

I do apologise mate but I've only just read this now. My notifications must have been playing up. I know it was a long time ago but thanks a lot for replying. http://www.hmfckickback.co.uk/public/style_emoticons/#EMO_DIR#/thumbsup.gif

 

Safe to say in the time that's gone by things have certainly got much better. I've only just turned 19 so it was a pretty horrible thing for me, but one that I felt no one would understand due to my age. My Dad sorted himself out a lot which in turn helped me out a lot too. I finally managed to get a job and felt less pressure in life. Last 10 months or so has been good and I'm enjoying life. Even found out I'm gonna be a Dad myself not too long ago. http://www.hmfckickback.co.uk/public/style_emoticons/#EMO_DIR#/10900.gif

 

I finally realised I just had to take control of my own life and you have to try and help yourself before you can rely on help from anyone else. I realised who is important in life and am trying to shun out those who aren't and are having any negative affect on my life. My family have sort of been torn apart in many ways by death and arguments on both sides of the family and I'm the only one who speaks to everybody so in many ways I felt as if I was in the middle and it all got a bit too much. But, I told myself that I had to just start putting myself first and start doing stuff for me for a change and it's definitely worked. Sure, I still feel deep down with the events that have occurred in my lifetime so far, a dark cloud hangs over me. But, there's no point in sitting around moping. My relatives that have passed on would rather I went out and did the best I could with my life rather than constantly mourn them. You have to laugh or else you'll cry at the end of the day.

 

Safe to say, I'm in a much better place. http://www.hmfckickback.co.uk/public/style_emoticons/#EMO_DIR#/thumbsup.gif

Okay, so following on from this and my earliest post in this thread, I've found myself slipping into a much worse state than I've ever felt.

 

For the last few months family, friends and even my daughters family nurse have encouraged me to see a GP regarding my mental well being. Only problem is, I'm fairly stubborn and I also find it hard to open up to people about my feelings.

 

Obviously I'm not going to go massively in depth about how I feel and what not on this, but my behaviour is starting to even concern me. Recently I've started delving into the dark world of gambling and alcohol much more often than usual as a way of blocking out things and also as a cheap thrill.

 

I've also started to get a lot of disturbing thoughts. While physically commiting suicide isn't something that's crossed my mind, I get so many thoughts about what if I just 'vanished' or something did happen to me, would my existence even be missed. I hate thinking that as i think it just makes me sound attention seeking and what's even worse is I have an 1 year old daughter therefore my existence would be missed greatly.

 

I feel ashamed even thinking about things like that and while it isn't an everyday occurrence, it's certainly happening more often and hitting me harder every time. I get thoughts that make me feel like I've no future. For example I've no life savings, I live in private letting and I don't have any trades or qualifications therefore I could lose everything just like that. When I get these thoughts I feel trapped and start feeling really anxious.

 

Basically all I'm wondering through this is, would it be worthwhile to go to a GP and as someone who struggles to open up and discuss my feelings, can anyone advise how to approach it? I just can't vision myself walking into the GP and explaining everything clearly at all.

[Der Kaiser]

Okay, so following on from this and my earliest post in this thread, I've found myself slipping into a much worse state than I've ever felt.

 

For the last few months family, friends and even my daughters family nurse have encouraged me to see a GP regarding my mental well being. Only problem is, I'm fairly stubborn and I also find it hard to open up to people about my feelings.

 

Obviously I'm not going to go massively in depth about how I feel and what not on this, but my behaviour is starting to even concern me. Recently I've started delving into the dark world of gambling and alcohol much more often than usual as a way of blocking out things and also as a cheap thrill.

 

I've also started to get a lot of disturbing thoughts. While physically commiting suicide isn't something that's crossed my mind, I get so many thoughts about what if I just 'vanished' or something did happen to me, would my existence even be missed. I hate thinking that as i think it just makes me sound attention seeking and what's even worse is I have an 1 year old daughter therefore my existence would be missed greatly.

 

I feel ashamed even thinking about things like that and while it isn't an everyday occurrence, it's certainly happening more often and hitting me harder every time. I get thoughts that make me feel like I've no future. For example I've no life savings, I live in private letting and I don't have any trades or qualifications therefore I could lose everything just like that. When I get these thoughts I feel trapped and start feeling really anxious.

 

Basically all I'm wondering through this is, would it be worthwhile to go to a GP and as someone who struggles to open up and discuss my feelings, can anyone advise how to approach it? I just can't vision myself walking into the GP and explaining everything clearly at all.

Yes. Yes yes yes.

 

I took too long to see my GP and like you I couldn't imagine saying anything to my Doc........and the flood gates just opened. I told him everything, how I felt, how I thought about suicide but couldn't do it because of my kids which made me feel even worse.....it was the best thing for me.

Ended up opening up to my Mum and Dad, my brother, my close mates.....get it done mate. You'll feel better and it's that first step thats the hardest.

[Locky]

Yes. Yes yes yes.

 

I took too long to see my GP and like you I couldn't imagine saying anything to my Doc........and the flood gates just opened. I told him everything, how I felt, how I thought about suicide but couldn't do it because of my kids which made me feel even worse.....it was the best thing for me.

Ended up opening up to my Mum and Dad, my brother, my close mates.....get it done mate. You'll feel better and it's that first step thats the hardest.

Good advice mate cheers.

 

That's the only thing that still slightly hinders me is I've bottled up almost everything I've been through in life to the point I feel almost emotionally numb at times. I'm just scared that if I find away to let it out or even if it all boils over I'm just going to have a major breakdown. I feel like a ticking time bomb.

 

Anyhow, following on from what you've said, you've basically summarised a lot of what I'm feeling so I'll definitely get along to the GP soon.

[Beverley]

LeBron

 

i was always the same about not really opening up about stuff like that, so when i eventually went to the docs, i took my sister with me in case i "forgot" to mention things that had happened.  so it might help to take a family member or close friend who is aware of the behaviour you're describing.

[Alex]

Good advice mate cheers.

 

That's the only thing that still slightly hinders me is I've bottled up almost everything I've been through in life to the point I feel almost emotionally numb at times. I'm just scared that if I find away to let it out or even if it all boils over I'm just going to have a major breakdown. I feel like a ticking time bomb.

 

Anyhow, following on from what you've said, you've basically summarised a lot of what I'm feeling so I'll definitely get along to the GP soon.

.

 

Why not write out/print out your posts above and tell the doctor you're not good at opening up in person but have managed the first steps online?

[martoon]

I suffered for a decade before making appointments to see my GP. Twice, when it came to blurting it out, I bottled it. Made up crap about sore knee etc. which wasted his time and mine.

 

When you sit down and the doc asks how he/she can help, it's really difficult to begin. I found it difficult to find an opening sentence, let alone explain something that I didn't really understand myself.

 

Just blurt it out. There's nothing you can tell a GP that they haven't heard before. Any feelings or fears you're experiencing have been felt by countless others. Including me.

 

Don't hesitate to make the appointment, mate.

[Muppetboy]

Okay, so following on from this and my earliest post in this thread, I've found myself slipping into a much worse state than I've ever felt.

For the last few months family, friends and even my daughters family nurse have encouraged me to see a GP regarding my mental well being. Only problem is, I'm fairly stubborn and I also find it hard to open up to people about my feelings.

Obviously I'm not going to go massively in depth about how I feel and what not on this, but my behaviour is starting to even concern me. Recently I've started delving into the dark world of gambling and alcohol much more often than usual as a way of blocking out things and also as a cheap thrill.

I've also started to get a lot of disturbing thoughts. While physically commiting suicide isn't something that's crossed my mind, I get so many thoughts about what if I just 'vanished' or something did happen to me, would my existence even be missed. I hate thinking that as i think it just makes me sound attention seeking and what's even worse is I have an 1 year old daughter therefore my existence would be missed greatly.

I feel ashamed even thinking about things like that and while it isn't an everyday occurrence, it's certainly happening more often and hitting me harder every time. I get thoughts that make me feel like I've no future. For example I've no life savings, I live in private letting and I don't have any trades or qualifications therefore I could lose everything just like that. When I get these thoughts I feel trapped and start feeling really anxious.

Basically all I'm wondering through this is, would it be worthwhile to go to a GP and as someone who struggles to open up and discuss my feelings, can anyone advise how to approach it? I just can't vision myself walking into the GP and explaining everything clearly at all.

Sounds like there's some elements of ocd within what you've described. The intrusive thoughts rang bells with me and the anxiety that follows definitely resonate with me too.

[Locky]

Cheers for the advice folks. I had no problem sharing my thoughts on here as it's fairly anonymous but if I could adopt the same mindset with say, a GP, then that would help.

 

I knew this was certainly the place to do it though. I've had a couple of wee conversations with folk at work where I've tried to let on that I think I may be suffering from some disorder but it sort of gets laughed off which I hate. That I think is the hardest part is I don't think anyone will take me seriously as I'm only 21 and generally am a happy go lucky type of guy. I even refuse to believe it myself sometimes.

 

Thanks again though.