The "Vent Your Spleen" Thread

[spud]

People, usually families, who get off an escalator and immediately stop to have a discussion on what they are going to do. Either you get propelled into them or they cause a huge back up on a moving stair.

 

People that say "I, personally......Who else's opinion are you going to have???

[I P Knightley]

When boarding a plan, why not let window seat people on first, then centre, then aisle. I hate having to wait as one person in the aisle seat blocks the passageway, holding up everyone else!! ,and then theres the hand luggage debate previously mentioned!

 

And when getting off - why unclip your belt as soon as the lights go off and then jump up to get your coats and gay-wheely-case from the locker knowing that you'll be standing for at least 10 minutes before the doors open and then wait another 5 while the front rows empty before rushing out to the baggage carousel where you'll wait another 10 minutes before the first case arrives? Why, eh? WHY??

 

And when you get to the baggage carousel, please be aware that your bag doesn't come out any quicker if you bunch up with your knees touching the carousel. If you do that and my bag comes before yours, I will reach through and lift my bag out, knocking you in the guts, the nuts or anything else that gets in its way; including children. Just stand back - behind the yellow line seems as good a place as any - and step forward once your bag approaches.

 

I'm breathing heavily and my shoulders are tense...

[Denny Crane]

Lois, the fat one and that dog!

[I P Knightley]

ignorant people when your are out shopping, walking around and all of a sudden they STOP dead in the tracks and you walk into them and they look at you as if it was your fault..

 

After a minor shunt this very lunch-time, I have to ask the people of this world to carry on with this stop for no reason stuff.

 

Following a couple of ladies along the pavement something caught my eye in a shop window. I didn't stop to look at it but had my head turned and didn't see the woman in front of me stop dead.

 

My reflex reaction was to lift my right hand to stop this unseen person from falling over and inadvertantly, I managed to cop a handful of right cheb. (oYo)

 

She smiled.

 

Now this kind of thing is only ever going to happen one time in a thousand (unless I work hard on making it appear as inadverant as it was this afty) but I'm prepared to work with those odds!

[joe kickass2]

Crusty looking students that give me evils when I am driving my gas guzzler. Work and pay taxes hippy.

 

Hate using buses - is it law that each bus has to have a spotty greaseball with an ipod that plays heavy metal? Or a fat bitch that tells us about what she has done since her o'grades (worked in argos by the sounds of it)

here's a tip, no need to shout if your conversation is with someone 5cm away.

[Legend Claws]

And when getting off - why unclip your belt as soon as the lights go off and then jump up to get your coats and gay-wheely-case from the locker knowing that you'll be standing for at least 10 minutes before the doors open and then wait another 5 while the front rows empty before rushing out to the baggage carousel where you'll wait another 10 minutes before the first case arrives? Why, eh? WHY??

 

And when you get to the baggage carousel, please be aware that your bag doesn't come out any quicker if you bunch up with your knees touching the carousel. If you do that and my bag comes before yours, I will reach through and lift my bag out, knocking you in the guts, the nuts or anything else that gets in its way; including children. Just stand back - behind the yellow line seems as good a place as any - and step forward once your bag approaches.

 

I'm breathing heavily and my shoulders are tense...

 

I am with you on all of the above! Sit down and chill out we aren't going to get off the plane faster if you stand up.

[Legend Claws]

After a minor shunt this very lunch-time, I have to ask the people of this world to carry on with this stop for no reason stuff.

 

Following a couple of ladies along the pavement something caught my eye in a shop window. I didn't stop to look at it but had my head turned and didn't see the woman in front of me stop dead.

 

My reflex reaction was to lift my right hand to stop this unseen person from falling over and inadvertantly, I managed to cop a handful of right cheb. (oYo)

 

She smiled.

 

Now this kind of thing is only ever going to happen one time in a thousand (unless I work hard on making it appear as inadverant as it was this afty) but I'm prepared to work with those odds!

 

 

How was the cheb?

[OBE]

Another roundabout one......

 

(For some reason this only seems to happen in the same area - coming off the A1 to join the Bypass and coming off the A1 to go to Kinnaird Park).

 

When you're coming down either of these slip roads to join the roundabout and you're turning left, you should be in the left hand lane - simple, eh!?

 

Not for some feckers who think it's perfectly acceptable to scream down the right hand lane and still turn left!

 

Does my bl00dy nut in! And, they've usually got the cheek to look at you in total bewilderment when you blast your horn at them.

 

I'm a screamer!...2 lanes leading onto the roundabout. 2 lanes on the roundabout. 2 lanes exiting the roundabout, can't see a problem.

 

This fecker laughs at you stationary guy's-n gal's in the inside lane. Don't let it do your nut in...take a walk on the wild side...join us screamers and reduce the size of the inside lane idlers.

 

The reason we seem to be "screaming" down the outside lane is because you are at a standstill, savvy!

[S.N.T.H.]

The alleged victimisation of Catholics in modern day Scotland. Stop being paranoid FFS!

 

People who don't signal a 'Thank you' when you've let them past, despite the obstruction giving them no right of way!

 

When taxis go right to the end of the Bus Lane, until an obstruction becomes apparent, and then they cut right infront of you. ****ing erses. I hate the fact that they can have it both ways, especially when they are ***** about it.

 

When a Corsa driver puts a big fat exhaust on his car. Honestly, give up.

 

When your boss goes on holiday at work, and someone who is incompetent is left in charge. Especially when the pressure is so hard on them that their man management skills become zero, and the whole work goes tits up.

 

People drive right up your erse, even when you're probably breaking the speed limit yourself. These folk are usually stupid little bitches who drive their husband's fuel guzzler. I deal with these people by slowing down to 10MPH, waiting for them to overtake round me, and then speeding up and making them feel like a ****. It's great fun.

 

When Private Cabs use the Bus Lane. Now, i don't know if that's allowed, but even if it is, i'm having none of it.

[JamboJen]

People that use 'O' instead of zero like 'My car rego is ABC1'O'3. They are not the same thing! Do you get me? Hard one to explain and yes I admit extremely pedantic!

 

I had a customer who came into my petrol station the other day, who told me his registration was "AB, nothing 7, XYZ"!!! WTF?!?! "Nothing" isn't a number!

[Zerothehero]

My two favorites have been well covered...

 

Drivers not using indicators and not having money or cards ready when paying.

The things that annoy me are people's general lack of awareness of and consideration for other people.

 

And undertaking is not cool, even with some zombie hogging the overtaking lane. A mate of mine landed a really nasty fine and set of points for one undertaking offense. That'll learn him.

[N User]

anyone else noticing that many many drivers drive at 15-20mph in 30mph zones? This is really starting to **** me off.

[S.N.T.H.]

Also, when customers at my work phone up for an enquiry regarding their account, yet don't have their a/c no and sort code ready.

 

Be ready, FFS.

[Toxteth O'Grady]

Dog sh*t in public places - track down the dog owner and feed it to them!

 

The other one that annoys me is dog owners who go to the bother of picking up their dogs turds in a plastic bag, tying up the bag and then chucking it down at the side of the path.

[Dagger Is Back]

People who think they can stop anywhere they like in their car as long as they put their hazards on!

Peopel who pish on public toilet seats - not nice when you're needing a No2

[A Boy Named Crow]

was going to say the same thing.

This is incredibly obnoxious and it puts you in a very awkward situation as you know they're an unsociable idiot, so you don't bother asking them to move their bag.

 

Incredibly annoying considering train ticket prices these days.

I was getting the train up from London about six months ago. The dude sitting opposite me had his bag on the other seat. The train was busy, so at every stop at leaset one person would ask if anyone was siting on the other seat. He would always reply "Yes, the bag is". One woman asked if the bag had a ticket - at which point he produced two tickets. He got away with this for a good while, until the guard told him that two season tickets get two people on the train, the other person could be anywhere on the train. His bag's reservation was a free reservation, and could only be used by a person. He had to put his bag up on the rack, but not before throwing himself over it shouting "The bag stays with me!"

He got off somewhere in the North of England, and I never did find out what was in that bag...the rest of us on the train had a right laugh speculating when he left the train.

[coppercrutch]

Driving down Drumbrae South. There are 3 lanes. Two going down, one coming up. If a bus stops in the ONE lane coming up the hill the cars behind simply swerve out into oncoming traffic. They don't just sit there and wait for the bus. They swerve out and force the oncoming head first traffic to swerve out of the way.

 

Shocking driving. Wrong side of the road into oncoming traffic. They wouldn't do that on an A road so what's the difference in town ?

 

Had enough of it tonight so I just stopped in the lane they were coming at and held my hand on the horn whilst flashing my lights non stop. Four cars passed just swerving to miss me before a sensible driver realised the danger of what he was about to do and actually waited until it was safe to go.

 

Why do people do this ? Are they in such a rush they would rather risk a head on collision than wait for 20 seconds ?

 

I want to be a policeman for a day and just sit there and charge about a thousand people with dangerous driving.

 

*****.

[Scooby Doog]

I'm a screamer!...2 lanes leading onto the roundabout. 2 lanes on the roundabout. 2 lanes exiting the roundabout, can't see a problem.

 

This fecker laughs at you stationary guy's-n gal's in the inside lane. Don't let it do your nut in...take a walk on the wild side...join us screamers and reduce the size of the inside lane idlers.

 

The reason we seem to be "screaming" down the outside lane is because you are at a standstill, savvy!

 

 

Oh aye, very good - what makes you so different that you don't have to follow the highway code?

 

I also doubt that your insurance company would be too chuffed if you caused an accident pulling this stunt but hey, you're above the law aren't you?

[A Boy Named Crow]

Here's another:

 

Folk who pronounce Budapest as "Boo-dah-pesht" but don't pronounce Paris "Pah-ree"; France "Frohnce"; Prague "Praha", or basically any other place in its local accent/dialect.

 

Get consistent people.

Bayern Munich - Bavaria Munich or Bayern Miunchen!!!!

[I P Knightley]

Bayern Munich - Bavaria Munich or Bayern Miunchen!!!!

 

I could be wrong here but I thought that the "Bayern" bit was to do with the pharmaceuticals company that founded the team as a works team, not the region, Bavaria?

[capitalJT]

my main gripes have been covered though one that really boils my **** is when I am clearly indicating off a main road and pedestrians carry on walking across the side road and dont even give a nod of appreciation or hurry their ass u....

[OBE]

Oh aye, very good - what makes you so different that you don't have to follow the highway code?

 

I also doubt that your insurance company would be too chuffed if you caused an accident pulling this stunt but hey, you're above the law aren't you?

 

 

What's the highway code?

 

I'm not insured and I'm not above the law, I'm here to uphold the law...I'm a traffic cop!

 

Always eating my burger in McDonalds before you!

[coppercrutch]

What's the highway code?

 

I'm not insured and I'm not above the law, I'm here to uphold the law...I'm a traffic cop!

 

Always eating my burger in McDonalds before you!

 

Really ?

 

If so can you tell me what I can do about the problem in post 167 please !!

 

It is endemic in this country.

[OBE]

Really ?

 

If so can you tell me what I can do about the problem in post 167 please !!

 

It is endemic in this country.

 

 

Flashing your horn and tooting your lights!...get the bus Victor.

[The Old Tolbooth]

Really ?

 

If so can you tell me what I can do about the problem in post 167 please !!

 

It is endemic in this country.

 

I think someones pulling your chain CC

[Denny Crane]

I could be wrong here but I thought that the "Bayern" bit was to do with the pharmaceuticals company that founded the team as a works team, not the region, Bavaria?

 

 

That would be Bayer, who are based in Leverkusen (Germany's version of Middlesbrough and miles north of Munich itself) and back the football team based there.

[steviefrailspants]

I like (and agree) with the post about folk who wear trainers with their suits on the way into the office. Not really sure why it annoys me so much but it does.....just looks absolutely ridiculous. Surely if your shoes are not comfortable enough to be wearing whilst walking to your work you should perhaps consider buying some comfier shoes or seeing a chiropodist.

 

I get the train to work, a commute of about twenty minutes to Glasgow city centre and what I find even more annoying than the trainer wearing types are folk who get on the train drinking out of a silver thermos coffee cup. Jeezo if you body can't survive without a caffine fix from leaving your house to arriving at your work I'd suggest you have a problem. I think it's a sort of 'look at me, I'm cosmopolitan' kind of attention seeking action where really instead of zipping into a Manhattan high rise office on the New York underground that they think they are, the offenders are actually getting on a manky SPT train from Hamilton to Glasgow Central in the pi5hing rain.

 

Rant over.

[coppercrutch]

I think someones pulling your chain CC

 

I think so !! I reckon he was the **** coming the other way.

 

Anyway how is this for a plan. I get myself an old seriously solid car. Drive down there and just keep on going next time this happens. Loads of witnesses, other guy overtaking on the wrong side of the road. No argument. I could sue for some sort of nonsense damages and make a tidy sum.

 

Only problem is it could be a little painful............

[The Old Tolbooth]

I think so !! I reckon he was the **** coming the other way.

 

Anyway how is this for a plan. I get myself an old seriously solid car. Drive down there and just keep on going next time this happens. Loads of witnesses, other guy overtaking on the wrong side of the road. No argument. I could sue for some sort of nonsense damages and make a tidy sum.

 

Only problem is it could be a little painful............

 

No pain no gain, and we're used to your car crash humour on here anyway

[coppercrutch]

No pain no gain, and we're used to your car crash humour on here anyway

 

Boom Boom !!

 

[I P Knightley]

I think so !! I reckon he was the **** coming the other way.

 

Anyway how is this for a plan. I get myself an old seriously solid car. Drive down there and just keep on going next time this happens. Loads of witnesses, other guy overtaking on the wrong side of the road. No argument. I could sue for some sort of nonsense damages and make a tidy sum.

 

Only problem is it could be a little painful............

 

You'd pick up a nice Jag XJ6 for a hundred quid. Or one of the 'indestructible' Toyota pick-ups as featured in Top Gear.

 

The pain could be alleviated if you were to strap a whole load of pillows and cushions around yourself before heading off on this venture. And you wouldn't look at all daft getting out of the car to inspect the damage.

[The Old Tolbooth]

Boom Boom !!

 

 

I'm here all week

[festerlehearts]

Taxi drivers. Give them points everytime they try one of their stupid u-turns and we'd have them all off the roads within the week.

 

Also, once you're inside they seem forget they're providing a service rather than doing you a favour.

 

taxi drivers in the green ways they drive to fast , when they get to the end of the green way they cut you up to get in front of you, corstorphin rd and st johns rd and glasgow rd , i travel every day every day they do the same, i think i will buy a tank that will sort them out ,( booooooooooom )

[S.N.T.H.]

I'm here all week

 

What annoys me is when people use my previous avatars.

[Legend Claws]

Needing a pish in the middle of the night.

[rudi must stay]

learning to drive

[Legend Claws]

Charity people on Princes Street!!! I walk up ad down there everyday (my office is on the street) and the same ones ask me for a minute of my time. I may get really angry soon!!!

[suicidalpostie]

Oh and people who avoid driving in the bus lanes that don't operate all day - the road from Haymarket to the Maybury being a good example.

 

yeah then look at you as if your the ferkin idiot

when you use it legally

:eek:

[freddie]

Oh and people who avoid driving in the bus lanes that don't operate all day - the road from Haymarket to the Maybury being a good example.

 

Spot on Stuart!

 

There are signs every 100 yards or so that tell you when the bus lanes operate, and more importantly, don't operate.

 

Makes you wonder if these halfwits don't notice those signs, what else don't they see when they're driving.

[Mr Romanov Saviour of HMFC]

This is going to make me sound like a miserable barsterd but folk who walk down the road smiling away.

 

Are you a weirdo? What is making you smile as you are walking on your own down the road?

 

Makes me uncomfortable!

[Mr Romanov Saviour of HMFC]

Another one!

 

Folk at the gym who just stare at you as you are lifting weights or whatever.

 

Why are you looking? I generally pull a rank face while lifting weights so I don't want people staring at my puss!

[The Mighty Thor]

This is going to make me sound like a miserable barsterd but folk who walk down the road smiling away.

 

Are you a weirdo? What is making you smile as you are walking on your own down the road?

 

Makes me uncomfortable!

 

I'd hazard a guess at love balls if the smiler is female or a butt plug if the smiler is male.

 

I may however be completely wrong.

[siegementality]

[jamboinglasgow]

people who walk in the meadows and dont seem to understand what the cycle path is for. The amount of time I have cycled along there, come up to a group walking along the cycle path, rang my bell and they dont respond, forcing me to go into the pedestrian lane.

 

Also dog walkers who dont control their dogs when bikes go past. I slow down near dogs but they are one of the dumbest creatures, they see you walk to one side so you think you will get past them then last minute ran across the path of your bike. The owner doesn't tell the dog to heal even when you ring the bell to warn them.

 

And finally, the new orange adverts, I dont f****ing care about I am everyone. It is done a really annoying way.

[Patrick Bateman]

Ignorant people who make no effort to improve themselves, yet insist on unleashing their poorly educated opinions on the world. Similarly, people who harbour obsessive thoughts about people from different backgrounds, faiths, etc.

 

People who have no respect for personal space, especially ill and toothless minions.

 

Anyone in public places who feels the need to listen to music on their speaker phone.

 

The City of Glasgow; aesthetically, culturally, morally bankrupt and if it were burned from the surface of the earth, it wouldn't be missed. Seriously. The "Friendly Glasweegian" myth is up there anything a Hibs fan can materialise.

 

Old people who smile as they come onto the bus; it's just not right.

[jamboinglasgow]

Ignorant people who make no effort to improve themselves, yet insist on unleashing their poorly educated opinions on the world. Similarly, people who harbour obsessive thoughts about people from different backgrounds, faiths, etc.

 

People who have no respect for personal space, especially ill and toothless minions.

 

Anyone in public places who feels the need to listen to music on their speaker phone.

 

The City of Glasgow; aesthetically, culturally, morally bankrupt and if it were burned from the surface of the earth, it wouldn't be missed. Seriously. The "Friendly Glasweegian" myth is up there anything a Hibs fan can materialise.

 

Old people who smile as they come onto the bus; it's just not right.

 

That does my head in as well, it seems to be mainly neds on buses who feel the need. They usually have the worst music and seem to think everyone else wants to hear their rubbish music. In terms of anti-social things you can do this is up near the top.

 

As for glasgow, I am sorry to say you do notice that they are a bit more friendlier here, but I think that is due to them being a bit more open at first, I always tell people that I find Glasgeigians "the most friendly but most violent people in Scotland."

[Captain Lithuania]

Certain people on KickBack who never have anything positive to say. (They know who they are)

[coatbridgejambo]

:rolleyes:mine is having to listen to the pc brigade

[alwaysthereinspirit]

People who dont say thanks when it's pretty obvious you held the door open only for them.

I usually say quite loudly "you're welcome" or "what am I? Your doorman"

I've actually had people say to me "oh sorry I forgot"

How the f@#$ do you forget to say thanks.

[keith]

my main gripes have been covered though one that really boils my **** is when I am clearly indicating off a main road and pedestrians carry on walking across the side road and dont even give a nod of appreciation or hurry their ass u....

 

Read the highway code mate, you're wrong they're right!!!