superjack Posted April 29, 2020 Posted April 29, 2020 A teacher asks her class what their favourite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says "G". The teacher says, "Why is that Angus?" Quote
JWL Posted April 29, 2020 Posted April 29, 2020 Young couple just moved in next door to me and they've already made a sex tape................................they obviously don't know this yet. Quote
EH11_2NL Posted April 29, 2020 Posted April 29, 2020 On 25/04/2020 at 03:50, narre said: My sexy Chinese neighbour told me she was desperate for a roger... It was only when I had my trousers round my ankles, that I realised she wanted to rent out her spare room! 😄 Quote
narre Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 As a small boy, I shared a bed with my 5 big brothers, and an old raincoat instead of a blanket... It was tough growing up in the hood! Quote
narre Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 A teacher asks her class what their favorite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says, "G". The teacher says, "Why is that, Angus?" Quote
narre Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 A wife comes home early to find her husband shagging a midget. "You promised me you wouldn't cheat on me again!" she screamed. "Calm down will you," he replied. "Can't you see I'm trying to cut down!" Quote
narre Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 Going to start a dildo repair service after the lockdown.. I'll call it "InspectHerGadget!" Quote
ri Alban Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 Did ye hear about the Irish shite? It done a Man. Quote
ƒιѕнρℓαρѕ Posted April 30, 2020 Author Posted April 30, 2020 Hear about the fly that won the lottery? He bought a shite in Spain. Quote
superjack Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 3 hours ago, narre said: A teacher asks her class what their favorite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says, "G". The teacher says, "Why is that, Angus?" Copycat. Quote
narre Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 2 minutes ago, superjack said: Copycat. Sorry matey,can't remember whats been done before Quote
superjack Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 1 hour ago, narre said: Sorry matey,can't remember whats been done before As you're the best poster on this thread (after me obviously), I'll forgive you. Quote
narre Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 2 hours ago, superjack said: As you're the best poster on this thread (after me obviously), I'll forgive you. Quote
Morgan Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 On 29/04/2020 at 10:43, superjack said: A teacher asks her class what their favourite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says "G". The teacher says, "Why is that Angus?" 10 hours ago, narre said: A teacher asks her class what their favorite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says, "G". The teacher says, "Why is that, Angus?" Right, guys. I’ve read this 119 times, I’m still lost. 🤷🏿♂️ Quote
redjambo Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 1 minute ago, Morgan said: Right, guys. I’ve read this 119 times, I’m still lost. 🤷🏿♂️ Take the g away from Angus. What have you got? Quote
¼½¾ Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 1 minute ago, redjambo said: Take the g away from Angus. What have you got? It almost works with his name too. Quote
ƒιѕнρℓαρѕ Posted April 30, 2020 Author Posted April 30, 2020 4 minutes ago, Morgan said: Right, guys. I’ve read this 119 times, I’m still lost. 🤷🏿♂️ Quote
ƒιѕнρℓαρѕ Posted April 30, 2020 Author Posted April 30, 2020 1 minute ago, Lemongrab said: It almost works with his name too. Haha beat me to it Quote
redjambo Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 4 minutes ago, Lemongrab said: It almost works with his name too. Quote
Morgan Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 20 minutes ago, redjambo said: Take the g away from Angus. What have you got? 18 minutes ago, Lemongrab said: It almost works with his name too. 16 minutes ago, Smithee said: 16 minutes ago, Smithee said: Haha beat me to it 13 minutes ago, redjambo said: Ok, ok. 😢😢 I’m tired, right? Quote
redjambo Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 1 minute ago, Morgan said: Ok, ok. 😢😢 I’m tired, right? That's ok, Morgan, old chap. You probably could do with a gnap. 🤗 Quote
ƒιѕнρℓαρѕ Posted April 30, 2020 Author Posted April 30, 2020 1 minute ago, redjambo said: That's ok, Morgan, old chap. You probably could do with a gnap. 🤗 Quote
Morgan Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 2 minutes ago, redjambo said: That's ok, Morgan, old chap. You probably could do with a gnap. 🤗 Just now, Smithee said: Gpiss off! Quote
ƒιѕнρℓαρѕ Posted April 30, 2020 Author Posted April 30, 2020 40 minutes ago, Morgan said: Gpiss off! there he is! Quote
ri Alban Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 (edited) 2 hours ago, Morgan said: Right, guys. I’ve read this 119 times, I’m still lost. 🤷🏿♂️ Anus Aa well! Edited April 30, 2020 by ri Alban Quote
Morgan Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 1 hour ago, Smithee said: there he is! 14 minutes ago, ri Alban said: Anus Aa well! I’m in the huff now. And I won’t be coming out of it any time soon. So there. Quote
milky_26 Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 13 minutes ago, Morgan said: I’m in the ghuff now. And I won’t be coming out of it any time soon. So there. ftfy Quote
Morgan Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 1 hour ago, milky_26 said: ftfy I somehow get the impression that I’ve not heard the end of this. Wish I’d shut my biG mouth. Quote
superjack Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 31 minutes ago, Morgan said: I somehow get the impression that I’ve not heard the end of this. Wish I’d shut my biG mouth. That’s the problem with the wine bein so cheap in France, easy to miss thins. Quote
Morgan Posted April 30, 2020 Posted April 30, 2020 26 minutes ago, superjack said: That’s the problem with the wine bein so cheap in France, easy to miss thins. Very ood. Quote
jb102 Posted May 1, 2020 Posted May 1, 2020 The heaviest man to ever ride a derby winner was Lester Piggott's cell mate. Quote
Swanny17 Posted May 1, 2020 Posted May 1, 2020 What do you call a magician who’s lost his magic? Ian. Quote
narre Posted May 1, 2020 Posted May 1, 2020 "Doctor, Doctor, please help! I'm getting married soon and I can't get over my fear of wedding vows. Do you know of a cure?" "I can't say I do." "Not you as well!" Quote
scott herbertson Posted May 1, 2020 Posted May 1, 2020 4 hours ago, Swanny17 said: What do you call a magician who’s lost his magic? Ian. I shouldn't find that funny but I do Jeez I must be getting bored! Quote
80bob Posted May 1, 2020 Posted May 1, 2020 (edited) My wife who is a bit deaf came back from the doctors in tears and told me the doctor said she had a nice hole. Turns out she acute angina Edited May 1, 2020 by 80bob Spelling Quote
Maple Leaf Posted May 2, 2020 Posted May 2, 2020 14 hours ago, Swanny17 said: What do you call a magician who’s lost his magic? Ian. Clever. Quote
narre Posted May 2, 2020 Posted May 2, 2020 I saw my neighbour jogging at 1am this morning . I said, "It's a bit late for you Sarah, isn't it?" "I couldn't sleep," she replied. "That's not what I meant, you fat cow!" Quote
narre Posted May 2, 2020 Posted May 2, 2020 A lot of people are doing puzzles to pass the time in lockdown. I’m ok with jigsaws, crosswords and sudoku but not join the dots.. You have to draw the line somewhere! Quote
Morgan Posted May 2, 2020 Posted May 2, 2020 18 hours ago, Worthing Jambo said: Love this thread👍😂 Ood, isn’t it? Quote
narre Posted May 2, 2020 Posted May 2, 2020 4 minutes ago, Morgan said: Ood, isn’t it? Yep reat stuff😄 Quote
Smack Posted May 2, 2020 Posted May 2, 2020 Teacher: .... and what's your favourite letter of the alphabet Morgan? Morgan: It's 'M' Miss, otherwise I'd be an organ. Teacher: [insert your own brutal punchline here, don't know him well enough myself!] Quote
ri Alban Posted May 2, 2020 Posted May 2, 2020 (edited) 19 minutes ago, Smack said: Teacher: .... and what's your favourite letter of the alphabet Morgan? Morgan: It's 'M' Miss, otherwise I'd be an organ. Teacher: [insert your own brutal punchline here, don't know him well enough myself!] Cock no start with a C. Only joking Angus. Edited May 2, 2020 by ri Alban Quote
narre Posted May 4, 2020 Posted May 4, 2020 The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello Quote
Tazio Posted May 4, 2020 Posted May 4, 2020 6 hours ago, narre said: The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello I can’t decking disagree with that. Quote
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