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**** Official JKB Awards 09/10 ****


Mr Romanov Saviour of HMFC

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Best poster: It's got to be Thommo for me. He's not let the madness of The Terrace wear him or his sense of humour down. You should admire guys who stick to their principles and he never hides from debate.

 

Best avatar: Picard's Forehead hands down. Honorable mention of course to Romanov Stole My Pension.

 

Best signature: The Liquidator.

 

Funniest poster: Ken Barlow hands down. The man's an absolute joy to read and once he's started on you, the games as good as over.

 

Least funny poster: Shaun.Lawson - not that he's "unfunny", I just can't be hooped reading 9 paragraph replies.

 

Best thread: Glasgow's Got Talent - more for my own participation in the whole thing, with me, Rob and Neave heading through for the event itself. Another honorable mention to The Phil McHugh Disappreciation Society thread - that's jam packed with hilarious posts.

 

Worst thread: The thread about getting JKB into the record books. I'd rather be remembered and noted in history for something memorable, like being the first man to teach a gold fish to rim him, not some utterly pointless, never ending thread on the internet.

 

Most improved poster: It's got to be The Doug/Miller Jambo 60. I'm so happy to see he's stopped typing by throwing a mallet at the keyboard for 5 minutes and hoping that out of the madness, something resembling sense came of it.

 

Person you'd most like to go for a pint with: Cigaro because he's got top taste in music and has always been a thoroughly nice chap on the board and Ken Barlow.

 

The poster most likely to end up in Saughton award: If I8Hibsh isn't locked up in the beast wing by New Year for trying to give a donkey a hand job at Edinburgh zoo I'll be absolutely amazed.

 

The Irvine Jambo Lifetime Achievement Award: Buffalo Bill. He's been here for an eternity but still has masses to contribute to the board.

 

Fact based post imo.

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I'm in a crew?! :laugh:

 

I cant think of answers for many of these so Ill cop out and do only a few.

 

Best Avatar: Neaves makes me laugh. Peanuts are good. Cant think of others.

 

Funniest: Audioslave, Neave, IJ, Barlow, Peanut, Acey etc etc etc. TBH everyone has their moments, but I do tend to make a point of reading their posts in the Shed.

 

Pint: See above, Thommo, Picards Forehead, Borthers. TBH most people. Roop, one day I'll not be working when you text me!:laugh:

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This thread's only confirmed what I've always known;

 

That at least 4 people on the internet think I'm funny.

 

Similarly it confirms to me that a surprisingly large amount of people enjoy pictures of Patrick Stewart.

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Best poster: LeChat for his hatred of all things Hibernian FC.

Best avatar: Mine

 

Best signature: There is an autograph section ?

 

Funniest poster: i8hibsh/craigieboy

 

Best thread: Knicker collection/protest thread

Worst thread: what are you listening to now

Poster whos content has deteriorated the most: JammyT, no offence Jammy but i used to enjoy your posts even if i did not agree with them, now they seem to just be about calling fellow Hearts fans names and VR is brought into every post.:smiliz21:

 

Person you'd most like to go for a pint with: Colinmaroon, Bobsharp, JohnBrownlie, LeChat, Therapist, MagicT, TheMightyThor, Leginten.

 

Best Double Act (ie wherever Laurel turns up, Hardy will be right behind him): Victorian and Lionheart

The poster most likely to end up in Saughton award: i8hibsh

The Irvine Jambo Lifetime Achievement Award: Jamboinglasgow and FootballFirst for their youth updates

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Similarly it confirms to me that a surprisingly large amount of people enjoy pictures of Patrick Stewart.

 

 

Surprisingly?

 

We're only human.

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BoJack Horseman
Similarly it confirms to me that a surprisingly large amount of people enjoy pictures of Patrick Stewart.

 

And two-legged horses.

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Best poster: Lots and lots of candidates, and almost all the people I either agree with or debate with on here I think are good posters in their own way - it means I think you're saying something worth responding to - but the current benchmark is being set by The Liquidator and Ken Barlow in my eyes.

 

Best avatar: Chester's John Hughes one was a belter.

 

Best signature: Picard's Forehead, hands down. I do like an angry, ranting one where you can feel the rage though - on that regard, JamboRobbo and MagicTs are right up there.

 

Funniest poster: Audioslave, The Ruiner and Chad Sexington always raise a chuckle with me.

 

Least funny poster: Nothing worse than a try hard, and JamboRobbo's particular brand of sarcasm/satire is as funny as getting landed next to a drunkard who's pished themselves on the bus. JammyT's attempts at humour often have them cracking open the suicide pills in the aisles as well.

 

Best thread: Other than my disgracefully overlooked random picture thread, I liked the Ken Barlow stuff. Well done to all involved - in particular the guy who posted a picture of The Ruiner on the phone next to a dying Mike Baldwin, with a caption that read: "Mrs Baldwin? Yep, Mike's dying... shall we say about 7?"

 

Worst thread: That thing a few folk have mentioned about getting KB into the Guinness Book of Records. Retarded. A word to the not so wise; if you can't even make it the longest thread in one section of one forum, you're not needing to dust off the tuxedos for the induction ceremony...

 

Most improved poster: Now that Doug's apparently off the nail varnish he's top value, but it's only fair to give this one to Drylaw Hearts. Ever since he stepped out from shadows of the JR harem, he's been much fairer and has shown a sense of humour I didn't know he had.

 

Person you'd most like to go for a pint with: All the usual guys mentioned by others: Cigaro, Liquidator, Audioslave, Gigalo Aunt, Peanut, IJ, Commander Harris, JiG, Leginten, The Ruiner, Le Chat, Mighty Thor, bighusref, Chad Sexington, Dave De La Noir, etc. etc. etc.

 

The poster most likely to end up in Saughton award: i8hibsh should practise his soap handling skills.

 

The Irvine Jambo Lifetime Achievement Award: Charlie_Brown, purely for arguing with the same people about the same things each and every day, and never resorting to the abuse that most of them give him.

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The nepotism on this thread is superb. Everybody is voting for each other and slapping their mates on the back.

 

The other 1,000 active members obviously dont give a hoot.

 

PS Doug is the best. :santa4:

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The nepotism on this thread is superb. Everybody is voting for each other and slapping their mates on the back.

 

The other 1,000 active members obviously dont give a hoot.

 

PS Doug is the best. :santa4:

 

Your proably right Deek, but at least the other 999 active members didnt give enough of a hoot to post on the thread. ;)

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The nepotism on this thread is superb. Everybody is voting for each other and slapping their mates on the back.

 

The other 1,000 active members obviously dont give a hoot.

 

PS Doug is the best. :santa4:

 

 

I don't know anyone on this board, let alone have 'mates' on it.

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The nepotism on this thread is superb. Everybody is voting for each other and slapping their mates on the back.

 

The other 1,000 active members obviously dont give a hoot.

 

PS Doug is the best. :santa4:

well i never... can you believe it eh? iceland giving top marks to denmark again... makes ye wonder what the point is eh? i mean... it wasn't even a good song but hey-ho...

 

terry_wogan_280_373518a.jpg

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well i never... can you believe it eh? iceland giving top marks to denmark again... makes ye wonder what the point is eh? i mean... it wasn't even a good song but hey-ho...

 

terry_wogan_280_373518a.jpg

 

:punk:

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Mr Romanov Saviour of HMFC
The nepotism on this thread is superb. Everybody is voting for each other and slapping their mates on the back.

 

The other 1,000 active members obviously dont give a hoot.

 

PS Doug is the best. :santa4:

 

Thinly veiled, the only person that would vote for me is Kearney19 after I based my holiday plans around his Disney character extravaganza leaving me seething that nobody recognises my contribution to the board post, imo.

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Your proably right Deek, but at least the other 999 active members didnt give enough of a hoot to post on the thread. ;)

 

Its my 5th post, this will be my 6th. I laugh every time I read it. :smiliz64:

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Mr Romanov Saviour of HMFC
well i never... can you believe it eh? iceland giving top marks to denmark again... makes ye wonder what the point is eh? i mean... it wasn't even a good song but hey-ho...

 

terry_wogan_280_373518a.jpg

 

That picture reminds me of this.

 

Semifinal_Hearts_vs._Hibernian.jpg

 

A virtual back slap to anyone who knows why.

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Is Wogan sporting a rager in that photo??!

yes the mole is alive and kicking in wogan's moleskin breeks.

 

GB must have got sept point.

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That picture reminds me of this.

 

Semifinal_Hearts_vs._Hibernian.jpg

 

A virtual back slap to anyone who knows why.

nope. 'mon then barlow lets have the answer. you're choking to say.

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chester copperpot

Right, I will indulge all you cyber back slappers and join in.

 

 

 

 

Best poster: - Too many, but my personal favourites are as follows, and in no particular order. Therapist/Liquidator/Cigaro/Johnmitchell/Audioslave/Gigalo Aunt/Le Chat/Drylaw Hearts/Neave/Peanut/Football First/Alan Partridge (He was better then)/Cosanostra/Victorian/Speedbump. Basically anyone with similar views to myself, but also those who are clear and stick to their own views. Except the ones who bore me to tears. If I had to go for my favourite though, I'd have to say Jack of Hearts, as I really enjoy reading all of his stuff.

 

Best avatar: - Cosanostra

 

Best signature: - Charlie Chester

 

Funniest poster: - Victorian always makes me chuckle, as does Boof and Audioslave. Deek has his moments too when he's not getting offended by myself.

 

Least funny poster: Dont wanna offend anyone, so I will abstain on voting in this category.

 

Best thread: - Many many classics, but the Kearndizzle one made me laugh for days.

 

Worst thread: - The record books one, and all the toilet threads started by Craigyboy, I hate those one's, though like Craigyboy.

 

Most improved poster: Doug by a mile.

 

Person you'd most like to go for a pint with: From the people I've never met, I'd go with Boof/Thommo/Cigaro/Le Chat/Therapist/Shaun Lawson/Jack of Hearts are all on my must meet list for the coming year.

 

The poster most likely to end up in Saughton award: WAJ, no wait, that was last year.

 

The Irvine Jambo Lifetime Achievement Award: - Has to be GAMBO for his exploits to Zagreb. And Shaun deserves an award for being so dedicated to his bull**** cause.

 

Best Newcomer - A few in this category, however my favourites are LBJambo91, Lasith.

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Right, I will indulge all you cyber back slappers and join in.

Funniest poster: - Deek has his moments too when he's not getting offended by myself.

 

I think I may just unfriend you on facebook, ya big fat fecker.:santa5:

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Right, I will indulge all you cyber back slappers and join in.

 

 

 

 

Best poster: - Too many, but my personal favourites are as follows, and in no particular order. Therapist/Liquidator/Cigaro/Johnmitchell/Audioslave/Gigalo Aunt/Le Chat/Drylaw Hearts/Neave/Peanut/Football First/Alan Partridge (He was better then)/Cosanostra/Victorian/Speedbump. Basically anyone with similar views to myself, but also those who are clear and stick to their own views. Except the ones who bore me to tears. If I had to go for my favourite though, I'd have to say Jack of Hearts, as I really enjoy reading all of his stuff.

 

Best avatar: - Cosanostra

 

Best signature: - Charlie Chester

 

Funniest poster: - Victorian always makes me chuckle, as does Boof and Audioslave. Deek has his moments too when he's not getting offended by myself.

 

Least funny poster: Dont wanna offend anyone, so I will abstain on voting in this category.

 

Best thread: - Many many classics, but the Kearndizzle one made me laugh for days.

 

Worst thread: - The record books one, and all the toilet threads started by Craigyboy, I hate those one's, though like Craigyboy.

 

Most improved poster: Doug by a mile.

 

Person you'd most like to go for a pint with: From the people I've never met, I'd go with Boof/Thommo/Cigaro/Le Chat/Therapist/Shaun Lawson/Jack of Hearts are all on my must meet list for the coming year.

 

The poster most likely to end up in Saughton award: WAJ, no wait, that was last year.

 

The Irvine Jambo Lifetime Achievement Award: - Has to be GAMBO for his exploits to Zagreb. And Shaun deserves an award for being so dedicated to his bull**** cause.

 

Best Newcomer - A few in this category, however my favourites are LBJambo91, Lasith.

blub... blub...

 

halle-berry-oscars.jpg

 

cheers for that CC. i am genuinely embarrassed now that i forgot you from my list.

 

*** for anyone interested - everyone - google image halle berry ***

 

not half.

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blub... blub...

 

halle-berry-oscars.jpg

 

cheers for that CC. i am genuinely embarrassed now that i forgot you from my list.

 

*** for anyone interested - everyone - google image halle berry ***

 

not half.

 

Sorry, what was that you said?

 

bruce-willis-halle-berry-4-23-07.jpg

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The Old Tolbooth
I don't know anyone on this board, let alone have 'mates' on it.

 

I remember meeting you in Diggers one night, you were hairy! Almost Captain Caveman like :santa1:

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The nepotism on this thread is superb. Everybody is voting for each other and slapping their mates on the back.

 

The other 1,000 active members obviously dont give a hoot.

 

PS Doug is the best. :santa4:

'Gutted at lack of nominations' post, IMO.

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The Old Tolbooth
I think I may just unfriend you on facebook, ya big fat fecker.:santa5:

 

For someone who doesn't care about this thread your nose isn't half out of joint :laugh:

 

m070209-nose+out+of+joint.jpg

 

 

For anyone who is offended that I didn't mention them, it's because I only mentioned people I haven't met yet, that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it! :smiliz65:

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For someone who doesn't care about this thread your nose isn't half out of joint :laugh:

 

m070209-nose+out+of+joint.jpg

 

 

For anyone who is offended that I didn't mention them, it's because I only mentioned people I haven't met yet, that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it! :smiliz65:

 

Thanks Fat Boy. :santa1:

 

John stick all your well earned money on Pepi Semo 2.40 Ascot Saturday. If you are quick you will get it at 5/1.

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I remember meeting you in Diggers one night, you were hairy! Almost Captain Caveman like :santa1:

 

 

 

This man speaks truth, a truth speaker he. Jealous, he may be though...;)

 

Thommo =

 

deltoro-wolfman.jpg

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Andy Townsend + Ron Atkinson + 2 bottles of red wine in a hotel room whilst covering a Champions League qualifier in Russia =

 

9 months later a miracle child was born

 

 

m070209-nose+out+of+joint.jpg

 

:

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I P Knightley
God you don't half forget folk when you do these posts, best poster would go down as PJ1 along with my original nomination, and add Beats and Ivanawfyticklicov to the list of going for a pint with, sorry dudes lol! :D

 

No probs, John. I'd gladly spend time with you over a pint or five. (You won't mind if I get my old 5-a-sides mate, Andy Parsons, to join us, will you?)

 

Finalising my nominations, then

 

Best poster: Any of the guys who contribute informed, considered and insightful stuff to the threads (and there's quite a few). John's mentioned PortobelloJambo1, there's Boris, BobSharp and Leginten and, of course, Shaun with many more to whom I apologise for failing to mention them.

 

Best avatar: Albannnach

 

Best signature: I've ticked the option not to see them. I hope they're all humorous and clean, chaps.

 

Funniest poster: Many great nuggets from Audioslave, he won my nomination last year with one of very few (for me) unforgettable quotes. But I'll stick with Felix & Oscar - I would buy a ticket to watch those two nark at each other in a pub.

 

Least funny poster: He seems to have dipped off the radar but I think that 3inaBednar thought he was being funny which is what made his unfunniness so remarkable. Others aren't funny, but they're not trying to be.

 

Best thread: Too many to select only one.

 

Kearndawg instigated many (take a loan; cash my gold; cyprus here I come etc.) but one that he was heavily involved in was just after Michael Jackson announced his residency at the O2. The phrase, "innocent, Innocent, INNOCENT. FACT, FACT, FACT" will live long in my memory.

 

Early in the year, MillerJambo60 (if ever a chap should be allowed to change his username, it's Doug!!) had a few crackers. There was one about some bloke who had 'borrowed' a couple of hundred old match programmes some 15 or 20 years previous and not returned them.

 

And, to echo my 'best poster' nomination, there are many in the Shed that are (to me) educational on history or geopolitics etc. (e.g. discussing the Israeli action in Gaza). The Shed ain't a Bad Place to be.

 

Worst thread:

 

Most improved poster: Leading nomination catergory, imo. Doug's a great poster.

 

Person you'd most like to go for a pint with: Bring me your huddled masses and we'll have a pint. Almost anyone who's buying - I'll even get you one back. If you put spurious h's in your words, though, and draw conclusions about people based upon their religion, I'd rather not.

 

Just some examples: Doug, JohnM; ChesterPishPot; Barlow; Deek; LeginTen; Shaun; Nelly; Geoff - basically, anyone who's not going to bore me with tedious drivel about Larry being a wage thief, flags or the financial position of HMFC.

 

The poster most likely to end up in Saughton award: Actually, I think it could be that young chap, LPJambo91. He seems to have a viscious turn of temper on him. One misplaced word in a bare somewhere in his vicinity and some poor guy could be glassed.

 

The Irvine Jambo Lifetime Achievement Award:

BobSharp. Not for any particular deed or action but for being a constant; a voice of reason and a thoroughly decent bloke.

 

 

 

(The wife's out tonight and I've got a lot of beer in. Hope this explains the verbosity.)

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I see...

 

Best Poster: MalkyMcFrench.

 

The only one to even mention me...

 

I know when I am not wanted...

 

I shall now go and sob into a pillow.

 

 

 

:)

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The poster most likely to end up in Saughton award: Actually, I think it could be that young chap, LPJambo91. He seems to have a viscious turn of temper on him. One misplaced word in a bare somewhere in his vicinity and some poor guy could be glassed.

 

:laugh:

 

Quality stuff bud.

 

I'm don't mean to be like that, just trying to be courteous to other posters. :smiliz64:

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chester copperpot
:laugh:

 

Quality stuff bud.

 

I'm don't mean to be like that, just trying to be courteous to other posters. :smiliz64:

 

 

 

Dont you forget your thanks to me for the nomination of best newcomer. I did spell your name wrong though, oooops.

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I see...

 

Best Poster: MalkyMcFrench.

 

The only one to even mention me...

 

I know when I am not wanted...

 

I shall now go and sob into a pillow.

 

 

 

:)

 

yay, I'm famous, those 5,000 + posts weren't in vain :santa1:

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chester copperpot

I knew I'd end up doing this, but can I update my Pintage for a person I aint met yet.

 

Would also like to meet I.J and Iwanasuckromanovov

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I P Knightley
Dont you forget your thanks to me for the nomination of best newcomer. I did spell your name wrong though, oooops.

 

Ain't that the way?

 

You politely welcome him to the fold and congratulate him on his start. I, on the other hand, near as dammit accuse him of being a modern-day Begbie and somehow it's me that get the LOL.

 

Sure sign of a psychopath...

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The Old Tolbooth
Thanks Fat Boy. :santa1:

 

John stick all your well earned money on Pepi Semo 2.40 Ascot Saturday. If you are quick you will get it at 5/1.

 

Oh sh it, the pressures on now! :santa1:

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The Old Tolbooth
This man speaks truth, a truth speaker he. Jealous, he may be though...;)

 

Thommo =

 

deltoro-wolfman.jpg

 

Feck me, that's a good pic of you mate!

 

Jealous? Nahhh! I save a fortune on Vidal Sassoon, I bet you spend a fortune :santa1:

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People you'd most like to go for a pint with: Jammy T, Charlie-Brown, redm, JamboRobbo, Rab,

 

Our romantic weekend in Berlin wasn't enough???????

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Dont you forget your thanks to me for the nomination of best newcomer. I did spell your name wrong though, oooops.

 

:smiliz64:

 

Thank you.

 

The reason for that was I was trying to act in a nonchalant manner. But really I was like a giggling schoolgirl.

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chester copperpot
:smiliz64:

 

Thank you.

 

The reason for that was I was trying to act in a nonchalant manner. But really I was like a giggling schoolgirl.

 

 

 

Lawl, I voted you mainly for your wit for a yoooongsta, however Lasith's nomination is purely down to the amount of laughter I get from his posts when he logs on blootered.

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yay, I'm famous, those 5,000 + posts weren't in vain :santa1:

 

Mum will be so proud :smiliz64:

 

 

Best Posters Victorian and LionheartF

 

Funniest Posters I.J when he's not suspended, Ken Barlow, Acey

 

Best Newcomer LPJambo91

 

Worst Poster JamboMickey

 

Best Avatar Albannach

 

Best Sig Picard's Forehead

 

Best Thread Don't know if the Score Angels counts as it was at the tail end of last year, The Phil McHugh thread was amazing

 

Best Post Pish Flaps :santa1:

 

Most Improved Poster Gotta be Doug

 

Outstanding Achievement Uly & Dexter a special mention to all the Mods and their Hobo hunting exploits.

 

The Wrongful Death Award (mafia) Malky & Yvonne

 

My Computer Should have a Breathaliser Lasith

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Commander Harris
Thinly veiled, the only person that would vote for me is Kearney19 after I based my holiday plans around his Disney character extravaganza leaving me seething that nobody recognises my contribution to the board post, imo.

not true! he got a vote for me as top shed poster.

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chester copperpot
Cheers for mine aswell CC.

 

:santa1:

 

 

 

You cheer up my otherwise boring nights fella, so you're welcome.

 

Plus, the Porty Hearts stuff gives you brownie points too. :santa1:

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Doctor FinnBarr
:smiliz64:

 

Thank you.

 

The reason for that was I was trying to act in a nonchalant manner. But really I was like a giggling schoolgirl.

 

Do you have the uniform?

 

:smiliz57:

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Do you have the uniform?

 

:smiliz57:

 

:64:

 

I'm in to many things, but reverse-roleplay isn't one of them.

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