Toilet Rolls

[Jambo-Jimbo]

11 minutes ago, vegas-voss said:

What will these folk going mad do when they do run out 😂

 

Jump up and down and curse and swear at all of those selfish tw@ts who have stockpiled them all.

 

And I ain't joking either.

[gjcc]

11 minutes ago, vegas-voss said:

What will these folk going mad do when they do run out 😂

The year is 2042. Kim from Oxgangs sits separating the ply on the last roll of Nicky bog roll. Quartering each sheet, she winces at the pain of holding her bowels for her bi-weekly dump.

[vegas-voss]

12 minutes ago, gjcc said:

The year is 2042. Kim from Oxgangs sits separating the ply on the last roll of Nicky bog roll. Quartering each sheet, she winces at the pain of holding her bowels for her bi-weekly dump.

Or right time to start on the 500 hundred kitchen roll just in case I ran out of bog roll 😂

[vegas-voss]

15 minutes ago, Jambo-Jimbo said:

 

Jump up and down and curse and swear at all of those selfish tw@ts who have stockpiled them all.

 

And I ain't joking either.

Imagine the devastation when they need to open the smart price version 

[Janbo1874]

One way to stop this bog roll panic buying is for the shops only to stock this.

Like wiping your ring piece with broken glass.

 

[vegas-voss]

5 minutes ago, Janbo1874 said:

One way to stop this bog roll panic buying is for the shops only to stock this.

Like wiping your ring piece with broken glass.

 

Like the stuff from school.I don't know of anybody that ever had a shit at school probably cause of that stuff 😂

[gjcc]

3 minutes ago, vegas-voss said:

Like the stuff from school.I don't know of anybody that ever had a shit at school probably cause of that stuff 😂

Stuff I had at school was more like grease proof paper. Didn’t clean, just spread it around. 

[redjambo]

5 minutes ago, gjcc said:

Stuff I had at school was more like grease proof paper. Didn’t clean, just spread it around. 

 

Yup. Happy memories.

[Jambo-Jimbo]

9 minutes ago, gjcc said:

Stuff I had at school was more like grease proof paper. Didn’t clean, just spread it around. 

 

And who said things were better back in the day 

[hueyview]

1 hour ago, Jambo-Jimbo said:

 

Naw mate, every shop I've been in still has plenty of beer, it's no that grim, yet.

Porn hub are providing free porn in Italy, how aboot free swally to see us through this period. 

Would make being locked in with other half just bearable. 

[hueyview]

43 minutes ago, Janbo1874 said:

One way to stop this bog roll panic buying is for the shops only to stock this.

Like wiping your ring piece with broken glass.

 

Got me through primary school...  Sure some lads used it for tracing. (Unused)

[King Of The Cat Cafe]

I note that The Times calls them "lavatory rolls".

[Jambo-Jimbo]

21 minutes ago, hueyview said:

Porn hub are providing free porn in Italy, how aboot free swally to see us through this period. 

Would make being locked in with other half just bearable. 

 

Shortly won't see the other half, she's a nurse and has been told that they will be required to work as many hours they can.

 

Every cloud, and all that...................  😄

[gjcc]

50 minutes ago, King Of The Cat Cafe said:

I note that The Times calls them "lavatory rolls".

Is that not just what the readers use to travel to ones outhouse?

[jumpship]

2 hours ago, superjack said:

We've done some good stocking up on things, ensuring we have enough to go without shopping for 2 weeks in case we need to isolate. Not bought any bread,  a couple of bags of flour and some yeast. A few tins of soup and beans. Some UHT milk. We will. Ow just carry on with a normal shop each week but rotate stock. Also got plenty of emergency cider as well, just in case.

Super, Well done you. Along with many others..

I watched a little old lady searching for toilet roll and bread today. Had to put the basket back. Probably going to walk a couple of miles up the road to find another shop... what's the bets that's all sold out as well by folks stocking up... 

Hope she's alright... 

 

If there's vulnerability folks out there, think of them guys... 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.edinburghlive.co.uk/news/edinburgh-news/here-you-can-next-supermarket-17925714.amp

[hueyview]

1 hour ago, Jambo-Jimbo said:

 

Shortly won't see the other half, she's a nurse and has been told that they will be required to work as many hours they can.

 

Every cloud, and all that...................  😄

[vegas-voss]

2 hours ago, gjcc said:

Stuff I had at school was more like grease proof paper. Didn’t clean, just spread it around. 

Aye same stuff

[¼½¾]

2 hours ago, hueyview said:

Got me through primary school...  Sure some lads used it for tracing. (Unused)

I had a teacher who used to hand out sheets of what he called 'high quality tracing paper'.

 

[J.T.F.Robertson]

5 hours ago, Jambo-Jimbo said:

 

Put the shower head on the floor and squat, works for me, especially when I've a severe case of baboon arse. 👍

 

Mandrill, had the album. Beautiful cover.

 

The reference to baboons made me think of it. Was a long time ago.

 

 

Edited March 15, 2020 by J.T.F.Robertson

[Jambo-Jimbo]

Seen a report from Rome on sky news this morning, the reporter was standing in front of an empty St. Peter's Square, anyway she mentioned that even on day 6 of the lockdown people in Rome were not panic buying.

 

My local Premier Store has now got a notice saying that people are only allowed one item of cleaning products, toiletries, pasta & rice.

 

I think it's only a matter of time before the supermarkets will bring in similar measures, indeed I think some are starting to, because it's clear a lot of people are not acting responsibly so they'll have to be told they can't have 20 packets of pasta or 30 tins of beans, there is plenty of food and supplies for everybody, if some people stopped acting like selfish dicks, there'd be plenty for everyone.

 

[Marvin]

I bought a 20 pk of super soft tissues from Sainsbury for a small outlay of £2.00 odd,  now selling on ebay a £5.00 a pop. If anyone wants one at a special JKB (paid members) price of £2.50 pm me.  I've never known panic like this. The fact that shop customers are fighting over the last pack of bog roll on the shelf is quite entertaining. Makes up for missing the Hearts game. 

[AlimOzturk]

The mentality of stockpiling something with an infinite shelf life doesn't make sense to me.

[westbow]

19 hours ago, Boris said:

If anything symbolises the break down of our society and community over the last forty years it is this.

If our national mentality was like this in 1940 we'd all be wearing jackboots by now.

Utterly pathetic.

Well said Boris. Our societal cohesion seem to be toilet paper thin. It’s ****ing embarrassing. 

[westbow]

11 hours ago, jonesy said:

Too sensible an idea. I’d imagine a hell of a lot of ‘panic bought’ goods will end up chucked. 
 

Supermarkets are making a killing off this, too. I’d imagine Amazon profits are through the roof, too. Folk staying home, bored, will shop as a form of entertainment. 
 

Whatever happened to ‘keep calm and carry on’? 
 

 

I’m not sure they are making a killing. Maybe initially. They have to employ more staff to cope and it’s only certain lines that run out which then take time to restock. I would imagine they would prefer it to be as it was. Again amazon has sold out of the main lines and will struggle to restock - believe me I sell on Amazon, they are slow at this.

You are right about keeping calm and carrying on - where’s the stoicism gone? 

[Mikey1874]

8 minutes ago, westbow said:

I’m not sure they are making a killing. Maybe initially. They have to employ more staff to cope and it’s only certain lines that run out which then take time to restock. I would imagine they would prefer it to be as it was. Again amazon has sold out of the main lines and will struggle to restock - believe me I sell on Amazon, they are slow at this.

You are right about keeping calm and carrying on - where’s the stoicism gone? 

 

Someone at work knows someone who sells a hand sanitizer as main business.

 

They are going to retire early on what they are making. 

[Jambo314]

Went to Costco this morning arriving at 9.45am for 10am opening. 100's queuing outside and signs up saying no toilet rolls, hand sanitiser etc, didnae bother waiting until 10am lol

[westbow]

42 minutes ago, Mikey1874 said:

 

Someone at work knows someone who sells a hand sanitizer as main business.

 

They are going to retire early on what they are making. 

Aye, someone knows someone.

[dobmisterdobster]

Stop buying so many toilet rolls. You don't need them.

Make sure you get alcohol-based sanitiser otherwise its useless.

[East Lothian Jambo]

On 14/03/2020 at 14:23, Boris said:

If anything symbolises the break down of our society and community over the last forty years it is this.

If our national mentality was like this in 1940 we'd all be wearing jackboots by now.

Utterly pathetic.

Agreed.  Tragic antics 

[Baldwigforjack]

22 hours ago, jumpship said:

Anyone willing to admit they are panic buying? 

 

Just in Tesco, hardengreen. No toilet roll, many shelves empty. 

 

Thing is, looking about I don't see anyone with lots of one thing.. 

 

Is there some supermarket conspiracy to leave shelves empty to wind up the public to panic buy more? 

 

 

I can guarantee we are NOT hoarding toilet roll in the warehouse. What little we do get delivered is sold out before 8am.

[milky_26]

2 minutes ago, Baldwigforjack said:

I can guarantee we are NOT hoarding toilet roll in the warehouse. What little we do get delivered is sold out before 8am.

to the staff?

 

[Baldwigforjack]

53 minutes ago, milky_26 said:

to the staff?

 

No.

[jumpship]

1 hour ago, Baldwigforjack said:

I can guarantee we are NOT hoarding toilet roll in the warehouse. What little we do get delivered is sold out before 8am.

I finished night shift this morning, was in the store for 8:30ish... I can confirm what you are saying. Place was busy... what little stock you had was flying off the shelf. 

 

Finally stores are doing something about it as I seen them taking loo roll off folk with more that two packs. 

Edited March 15, 2020 by jumpship

[highlandjambo3]

22 hours ago, FWJ said:

Only if you’re good at handstands.

Would you not fill up 😅

[highlandjambo3]

19 hours ago, jonesy said:

Too sensible an idea. I’d imagine a hell of a lot of ‘panic bought’ goods will end up chucked. 
 

Supermarkets are making a killing off this, too. I’d imagine Amazon profits are through the roof, too. Folk staying home, bored, will shop as a form of entertainment. 
 

Whatever happened to ‘keep calm and carry on’? 
 

 

Got a bank nurse staying at our place for the last 6 weeks or so.....length of her stay as yet is unknown.  Everyday at least 2 parcels arrive and today........a fekin ironing board was delivered, I mean wtf??  We provide these for guests.

[redjambo]

12 minutes ago, highlandjambo3 said:

Got a bank nurse staying at our place for the last 6 weeks or so.....length of her stay as yet is unknown.  Everyday at least 2 parcels arrive and today........a fekin ironing board was delivered, I mean wtf??  We provide these for guests.

 

[highlandjambo3]

1 minute ago, redjambo said:

 

That’s her...... are you hiding in her room?

[redjambo]

Just now, highlandjambo3 said:

That’s her...... are you hiding in her room?

 

Yes. I took the picture.

 

We're practising for the next flood.

 

 

You don't want to know what's in those other parcels though.

[Carl Weathers]

I was in Morrisons earlier and there were no tatties left. WTF

[Dusk_Till_Dawn]

What’s with the toilet roll? Does COVID 19 make you shit yourself?

[Mikey1874]

Trump on now. Just asked people to stop stockpiling. Causing problems there too. 

[luckyBatistuta]

1 hour ago, Dusk_Till_Dawn said:

What’s with the toilet roll? Does COVID 19 make you shit yourself?

You never know when you might need it, better to be safe

 

 

[gjcc]

15 minutes ago, BarneyBattles said:

I was in Tesco Eskbank about 11am (as I am every Sunday). 
 

Much busier that usual and the checkout girl said it had been like that since she started at 5:30am. 
 

No mince and very little other meat, no pasta, bog roll, rolls etc. 
 

I asked a guy stacking shelves when the were re-stocking. Tonight he said ‘but it will all be gone in half an hour’.  
 

Utter dicks panic buying. 

They should get a bumper delivery, publicise when they are expecting it and call it Brown Friday. They’ll make a fortune off the mugs. 

[JackLadd]

I'm on kitchen roll in my loo thanks to the hoarders. 

[ri Alban]

Shops with the auld don't panic buy lies. They're loving it.

[manaliveits105]

Taser the smug panic buying barstewards before the checkouts 

[All roads lead to Gorgie]

I tell you what plumbers will be busy soon unblocking toilets when people start using kitchen towels and newspaper on a massive scale 🙂

[Ainsley Harriott]

On 14/03/2020 at 14:26, micole said:

WTF is there a shortage of Toilet Roll does the virus cause a dose of the shits as well. 

Apparently not. If anything you will be shitting less as it does cause a loss of appetite 

[The Internet]

 

[I P Knightley]

On 14/03/2020 at 20:59, Janbo1874 said:

One way to stop this bog roll panic buying is for the shops only to stock this.

Like wiping your ring piece with broken glass.

 

What was 'medicated' in this stuff?