Funniest shouts

[bighusref]

No mention of Ross Tokely shouts then? Probably for the beat.

[Eckauskas]

Not one of these have been funny.

[JT1959]

Always remember a cracker from Cruikie. We were trailing to Dundee?? with 5 mins or so to go and ball ends up in Mcleod street end. We laddie ran to grab it and tried to kick it back to Cruickie but scaffed it and sent it sideways. Cruickie shouts out "Ya ******-eyed wee b******" Wee boy was gutted.

 

Remember a Rowbotham one where he indicated he didn't see an incident and someone called out "If you took some of that hair oot yer eyes ye might see what's goin on".

 

Playin in a euro tie, we had a useless ref, some boy shouted out asking where the ref was from. "Sweden" someone replied, "He's a Swede" --- "Mair like a Turnip" the boy replied with.

[Craig Gordons Gloves]

not a shout but at Pittodrie a few years back, some guy had his daughter with him (she must have been about 7 or 8 years old) - anyway, we scored and the guy leapt up chucking his arms in the air and at the same time lands a haymaker of a punch on the wee lassies jaw. She goes down like a brick. What made it funnier was him turning round after about 10 seconds and having a very confused look on his face at why his daughter was lying on the concrete.

 

The best shout i have ever ever ever heard at Tynie was from a famous poster on here who was sat next to me at a Killie game. From nowhere came the now infamous "Oi Mitchell , your haircut is shite"

 

funny to me and maybe 2 others, but there you go.

[Deevers]

Few years ago now - standing in the old south enclosure in a match against St Mirren -A rather portly Jimmy Bone had just been flagged offside and ran over to the remonstrate with the referee near to the touchline about the decision when a rather inebriated guy standing along from us shouted "it wis'ne you that was offside Jimmy it was yer feckin belly. Everybody in earshot including Jimmy Bone creased themselves.

[Coburg Hearts]

I remember one at Falkirk during the "crisis" era when Malofeev was in charge. We broke on the counter attack with Miko taking the ball forward. This was at a time when Miko's form was at an all-time low and the resentment from the stands was at an all time high. The guy beside me - who had done his best to back all of the players throughout the game - finally lost his patience as Miko stumbled over the ball:

 

"Run. RUN! RUN YA LITTLE B*ST*RD!!!"

 

Definitely one you had to be there, though. To me, it summed up the frustration and the support through gritted teeth that was prevalent at the time.

 

 

 

 

I can't be a real supporter then as I NEVER thought of Miko like that. Silly me, not thinking one of our players was a little B*AST*RD.

[Busby8]

hibs v Hearts at Fester Road.

 

Silky (?) hibs midfielder Brian Rice sklaffs a pass out for throw in.

Guy next to me shouts , "RICE !................your a puddin!"

What made it even better was that it was pretty obvious from the flusteted way that he shouted it, that he didn't mean it to be funny.

 

 

1996 Hearts v Rangers LCF

Goran Petric is getting away with murder, kicking lumps out of the entire Hearts forward line.

 

Guy behind me shouts loud enough for eveyone within 10 yards to hear, " FurFks Sake Ref, can yae know spell he's name. It's oanly goat five letters"

 

There was a significant pause all around while the great mathematicians close by started counting inwardly before having a wee chuckle.

[gashauskis9]

A couple to note;

 

Early 90s in the school end, some old boy kept shouting, "**** sake Mackay, earn yer corn" (what does this mean?). Same old boy calling Jim Weir "Pig in f**kin knickers" a season or two later.

 

2004ish, in relation to Neil Macfarlane's inability to turn on a ball without completing a full 360 degree cycle, "Use your mirrors Neil"!

 

Quite a few from one individual who used to sit behind me in the Wheatfield (whenever he shouted, the whole stadium listened);

- Bordeaux midfielder crunches into one of our lads, followed by a shout from behind me off, "Dinnae book him ref, he'll shoot you in the church on Sunday!!!"

- A Dundee striker collapses in the box to win them a soft penalty, "**** sake referee, he went doon like an auld wuman wi a shoppin trolley"

 

The others escape me.

[speedbump]

Managed to get a big grin from Duberry this season after calling him a grass, made me smile if nothing else

[Robbo-Jambo]

Pierce O Leary (brother of David) when he was playing for Celtic.

 

Had come become public knowledge that he was gay and his first game at Tynie after the news had broke.

 

The guy next to me shouted when he ran out the tunnel, Pierce O Leary ??, mair like Pierce Ma Botty.

[Danny1874]

*David obua comes on as a sub

guy behind me shouts, "Look, Avatars coming on!"

[lost in leith]

After yet another pass went nowhere near a team-mate "Haw, Mikey Stewart, have you got Sideshow Bob's bits oan the day?".

 

After Colin McAdam got clattered "C'moan ref, you're meant to protect the ball players!". You need to be a certain age to appreciate the irony behind that one.

 

Speaking of irony, I remember a game in 1995 when we lost 3-1 at Easter Road. It was on the 40th anniversary of VE day and we were in serious danger of getting relegated. Their funny shout was to sing "We'll meet again". We stayed up, Jim Duffy arrived in a helicopter and the rest is history .

 

 

[Del1812]

I can't be a real supporter then as I NEVER thought of Miko like that. Silly me, not thinking one of our players was a little B*AST*RD.

 

Eh?

[Gods a Jambo]

A couple to note;

 

Early 90s in the school end, some old boy kept shouting, "**** sake Mackay, earn yer corn" (what does this mean?). Same old boy calling Jim Weir "Pig in f**kin knickers" a season or two later.

2004ish, in relation to Neil Macfarlane's inability to turn on a ball without completing a full 360 degree cycle, "Use your mirrors Neil"!

 

Quite a few from one individual who used to sit behind me in the Wheatfield (whenever he shouted, the whole stadium listened);

- Bordeaux midfielder crunches into one of our lads, followed by a shout from behind me off, "Dinnae book him ref, he'll shoot you in the church on Sunday!!!"

- A Dundee striker collapses in the box to win them a soft penalty, "**** sake referee, he went doon like an auld wuman wi a shoppin trolley"

 

The others escape me.

 

 

I stood near him for years. I mentioned him earlier, he always said "earn yer corn".

[Only a Game]

When that was sung up at killie it was funny.

 

I laughed so hard my coffee went fecking everywhere.

[Budgie.]

Does anybody remember the guy who used to sit in Wheatfield Section C who constantly shouted "That's a push!" every five minutes.

 

Used to sit behind a really funny guy in Section C lower. He would come out with two or three belters every match and had us in stitches. He had nicknames for all the players ( Webster was called Sally and Maybury was called Casino IIRC) he always gave the opposition players a torrid time and he had a really loud voice.

 

I remember in the Fulham friendly years ago my mates and I gave Stan Collymore the "Ulrika" chant from Shooting Stars and he went mental!

[heartstastic]

Maybe another had to be there moment, the 1-0 against Rangers when Burley was manager....guy sitting a few seats to my right gets up and shouts 'MARVIN ANDREWS ATE HIS COUSIN' (think it was reference to him being into all things faith healing). There was a couple of rows in fits of laughter.

[speedbump]

Maybe another had to be there moment, the 1-0 against Rangers when Burley was manager....guy sitting a few seats to my right gets up and shouts 'MARVIN ANDREWS ATE HIS COUSIN' (think it was reference to him being into all things faith healing). There was a couple of rows in fits of laughter.

 

Really?

[Jambo_all_the_way]

Guy in N2 shouts at oppo players and if they turn around they normally see him and his mates giving them the finger. Anyway he shouted at dougie imrie "oi dougie" who turned around surprised saying aye to see all of that section giving him the finger and laughing at him.

 

How is this funny?

Sounds a bit immature to me (almost bully like) and poor example to kids

[Bunny Munro]

When Goncalves was here for the first time, and playing as an appauling leftback, I remember one of out boys got chopped down on the edge of the box, and the ball broke to Goncalves wide on the left, the ref put his arms up to say play on, and a boy a few rows back shouts;

 

"Hows that advantage? Jose's got the ball!"

[jambojim1986]

Managed to get a big grin from Duberry this season after calling him a grass, made me smile if nothing else

 

1st game of the season by any chance? I remember this!

[Guest C00l K1d]

How is this funny?

Sounds a bit immature to me (almost bully like) and poor example to kids

[speedbump]

1st game of the season by any chance? I remember this!

[jambo19]

How is this funny?

Sounds a bit immature to me (almost bully like) and poor example to kids

 

It was a had to be there moment. I dont think it was bully like as Imrie walked off with a beamer and was laughing. It was the sheer surprise of oh somebody shouted on me, and then he realised what he had done.

[dsk1210]

Maybe another had to be there moment, the 1-0 against Rangers when Burley was manager....guy sitting a few seats to my right gets up and shouts 'MARVIN ANDREWS ATE HIS COUSIN' (think it was reference to him being into all things faith healing). There was a couple of rows in fits of laughter.

 

 

Another one in the same game, was not at a player but at one of the rangers fans, it was in the wheatfield, we had just scored to go 1-0 up (bednar), there was an old guy with a huge white beard dressed like a tramp in the rangers end, everybody in section g and f was singing "santa santa whats the score" the boy was going ballistic all the hearts fans were pointing and singing directly at him, even the rangers fans were pissing themselves.

 

 

Dave

[speedbump]

Another one in the same game, was not at a player but at one of the rangers fans, it was in the wheatfield, we had just scored to go 1-0 up (bednar), there was an old guy with a huge white beard dressed like a tramp in the rangers end, everybody in section g and f was singing "santa santa whats the score" the boy was going ballistic all the hearts fans were pointing and singing directly at him, even the rangers fans were pissing themselves.

 

 

Dave

 

Stinking old man from Inverness and I really do mean he stinks.

[dsk1210]

Stinking old man from Inverness and I really do mean he stinks.

 

 

Certainly no suprise to me, looked like he needed de-loused.

 

 

Dave

[gorgie_rebel]

Away game in the mid 80's (Motherwell I think)

 

Wattie Kidd wins and clears a ball from outside the box and my mate shouts "Good challange Zico"

A boy standing just in front of us turns round and says quite loudly "He's called Walter"

 

A wee while later I've shouted to Brian Whittaker "Well in Roger" and again the boy turns round and says "His name's Brian ya dummy"

 

Que a couple of guys just to the right of this dude taking it in turns to wind the boy up.

 

To Henry Smith - "Boaby Boaby give us a wave"

 

"Robbo Robbo Robbo Robbo Robbo Ro Robertson Dave Robertson Dave Robertson...."

 

"Theres only one Clive Berry"

 

The boy moved off and stood further down the terracing.

 

Even the polis were pishin themselves.

[jambovambo]

Away game in the mid 80's (Motherwell I think)

 

Wattie Kidd wins and clears a ball from outside the box and my mate shouts "Good challange Zico"

A boy standing just in front of us turns round and says quite loudly "He's called Walter"

 

A wee while later I've shouted to Brian Whittaker "Well in Roger" and again the boy turns round and says "His name's Brian ya dummy"

 

Que a couple of guys just to the right of this dude taking it in turns to wind the boy up.

 

To Henry Smith - "Boaby Boaby give us a wave"

 

"Robbo Robbo Robbo Robbo Robbo Ro Robertson Dave Robertson Dave Robertson...."

 

"Theres only one Clive Berry"

 

The boy moved off and stood further down the terracing.

 

Even the polis were pishin themselves.

 

Heh - imagine the situation for that boy these days ... Beniuseless, Ksanavichoosh, Clum, etc ... he'd be whirling around and correcting people all game !

[Boomstick]

Away game in the mid 80's (Motherwell I think)

 

Wattie Kidd wins and clears a ball from outside the box and my mate shouts "Good challange Zico"

A boy standing just in front of us turns round and says quite loudly "He's called Walter"

 

A wee while later I've shouted to Brian Whittaker "Well in Roger" and again the boy turns round and says "His name's Brian ya dummy"

 

Que a couple of guys just to the right of this dude taking it in turns to wind the boy up.

 

To Henry Smith - "Boaby Boaby give us a wave"

 

"Robbo Robbo Robbo Robbo Robbo Ro Robertson Dave Robertson Dave Robertson...."

 

"Theres only one Clive Berry"

 

The boy moved off and stood further down the terracing.

 

Even the polis were pishin themselves.

 

There was a biddy at falkirk in the lc game that kept calling Suso 'Cecil' which amused me no end.

[Beejam]

At the recent Dun. Utd. game a guy in section G lower shouted.....Goodwillie, yer a disgrace to yer name. Timing is everything with most shouts.

 

Same game guy in Section A 4 rows from the front shouts ' Goodwillie, aye yir mother sucks a Goodwillie !!! immature but funny as ....

[Chad Sexington]

This thread has been a comedy free zone.

[marooned in essex]

All time favourite of mine was at Andy Watson after another misplaced pass. Bloke near me shouts " Watson, yev wasted mair baws than Joan Collins"

[kingantti1874]

Mentioned this before but we were 4-0 up on the hobos and the away end was emptying - one fat bird sat on her tod closed to section N... song was ' have you eaten all your mates' absolutely hilarious, thought she was going to cry.

[sandylejambo]

from the Gorgie stand against Dundee United, hey goalie, some clowns put an R in your name