maroonlegions Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I was on the bus coming back home from doing some shopping up town.The bus was heaving with people standing.It was my stop so i had to manoeuvre past people that were standing when one of my bags sort of slapped this guy in the back off the head.:qqb018:It sounded worse than it was but i offered my apologies and he was ok about it, then i realised i was 2 fecking stops too early and the bus was at a stand still due to heavy traffic.I glanced over at my seat but that had gone to one of the vultures that had been standing . what was worse was that i was still standing next to the dude i had accidentally whacked over the back off the head with one of my bags.The bus took fecking ages to get to my stop as i soon realised that a number of people standing were getting off at the same stop as me.Then to make matters a bit more interesting i felt one of those scary f**** coming on , the ones that you take a chance on that hopefully are not loud as feck or silent and a bit stinky.Tried my best to hold it in for a while:qqb012: but in the end nature won.Puuuuuuump, :fart:it was a loud one, fecking no were to hide, some people chuckled and some looked away, the dude who i hit with my bag broke the ice a bit with,"its not you day is it". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.J Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I was sat on a bus with a mate once, and he told me the following joke: "What do you do if you see an Epileptic having a fit in the bath? Throw in your washing." The guy behind us leaned over and said, "I think that's disgusting. My son died in the bath whilst having a fit." We both went white and apologised. The guy got up to get off and said, "He choked on a sock." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maroonlegions Posted March 5, 2009 Author Share Posted March 5, 2009 I was sat on a bus with a mate once, and he told me the following joke:"What do you do if you see an Epileptic having a fit in the bath? Throw in your washing." The guy behind us leaned over and said, "I think that's disgusting. My son died in the bath whilst having a fit." We both went white and apologised. The guy got up to get off and said, "He choked on a sock." Nothing like someone breaking the ice eh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Say What Again Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I was sat on a bus with a mate once, and he told me the following joke:"What do you do if you see an Epileptic having a fit in the bath? Throw in your washing." The guy behind us leaned over and said, "I think that's disgusting. My son died in the bath whilst having a fit." We both went white and apologised. The guy got up to get off and said, "He choked on a sock." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supernoodle Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I was sat on a bus with a mate once, and he told me the following joke:"What do you do if you see an Epileptic having a fit in the bath? Throw in your washing." The guy behind us leaned over and said, "I think that's disgusting. My son died in the bath whilst having a fit." We both went white and apologised. The guy got up to get off and said, "He choked on a sock." That's brilliant I slid right the way down the aisle of the top deck on my jax one day, it had been snowing and i was wearing white jeans most likely deserved it for wearing white jeans tbh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andi17 Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Was on a packed bus many years ago when you were still allowed to smoke upstairs , Anyway guy sitti,n next to me is having a puff so when he,s finished he throws his fag down meaning to stub it out but he obviously couldnae find it. Next minute am jumpin up and doon like a right looney the lit fag had went down the side o ma shoe and was burnin the side of my foot . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I slid down the stairs on my bus home from work and broke a heel off my shoe... busiest bus ever then I had to hobble home with one heel!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I slid down the stairs on my bus home from work and broke a heel off my shoe... busiest bus ever then I had to hobble home with one heel!! when and where was that chic? reason i ask is that happened to a lass on a bus i was on in dalkeith about a year ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 when and where was that chic? reason i ask is that happened to a lass on a bus i was on in dalkeith about a year ago. It was a First bus in Broxburn about 8 months ago Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 It was a First bus in Broxburn about 8 months ago ah right! well you weren't the only one that happened to then eh, hope you were alright and weren't hurt? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor FinnBarr Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 It was a First bus in Broxburn about 8 months ago That must make it a common occurence then! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 ah right! well you weren't the only one that happened to then eh, hope you were alright and weren't hurt? Nah I was fine just highly embarassed lol! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Nah I was fine just highly embarassed lol! ha ha never mind as long as you weren.t hurt eh. buses and heels don't go eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I had had too much bevvy on an afternoon session and was feeling boaky, asked the driver to open the doors at traffic lights before bus turned into Lothian Road, he would not do it. Result was i wrote the bus off and scarpered off into the night before police came, only problem was it was witnessed by my mate a Hibs scout Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 ha ha never mind as long as you weren.t hurt eh. buses and heels don't go eh? Ha ha I would say more me and heels don't go!! I wear them everyday too, dangerous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 That must make it a common occurence then! Really? I've only done it once!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eggo Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I followed through on a bus as it was going across the Forth Bridge and had to walk past everyone reekin of shoit as I was in the back seat:th_sad: It was in 1976,when you were allowed to shoit yir drawers:clown: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Ha ha I would say more me and heels don't go!! I wear them everyday too, dangerous. ha ha, blond moments! hope you don't wear them to the hearts games? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I followed through on a bus as it was going across the Forth Bridge and had to walk past everyone reekin of shoit as I was in the back seat:th_sad: It was in 1976,when you were allowed to shoit yir drawers:clown: ha ha ha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikki 74 Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I slid down the stairs on my bus home from work and broke a heel off my shoe... busiest bus ever then I had to hobble home with one heel!! I,v done that too, I was worse for wear though, thats what I get for drinking and wearing heels, its highly embarassing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maroonlegions Posted March 5, 2009 Author Share Posted March 5, 2009 I slid down the stairs on my bus home from work and broke a heel off my shoe... busiest bus ever then I had to hobble home with one heel!! The fact that your initial embarrassing episode happened on the bus ,then having to hobble home on one heel was a step to far:walkman:, one could add.Hope you got home safely though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 ha ha, blond moments! hope you don't wear them to the hearts games? Ha ha no thats what I love about the footy I can get away with wearing my trainers Not a wannabe wag (only girls that wear heels to footy! only in my opinion though!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby_swing_the_bar Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Cant believe you would ever drink Nikki?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 The fact that your initial embarrassing episode happened on the bus ,then having to hobble home on one heel was a step to far:walkman:, one could add.Hope you got home safely though. Thanks I did, thankfully it wasn't winter or I'd have been hobbling home in the snow! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maroonlegions Posted March 5, 2009 Author Share Posted March 5, 2009 I,v done that too, I was worse for wear though, thats what I get for drinking and wearing heels, its highly embarassing Aye, i ken. ONLY JOKING.:jester: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Ha ha no thats what I love about the footy I can get away with wearing my trainers Not a wannabe wag (only girls that wear heels to footy! only in my opinion though!) ha ha! aye quite right about getting the trainers on to the footy, what stand do you sit in at tynie? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikki 74 Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Cant believe you would ever drink Nikki?! You know me JS I,m a little saint...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I,v done that too, I was worse for wear though, thats what I get for drinking and wearing heels, its highly embarassing Oh I've had many drunken heel incidents!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I,v done that too, I was worse for wear though, thats what I get for drinking and wearing heels, its highly embarassing having stayed next door to you nikki you don't drink ha ha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 ha ha! aye quite right about getting the trainers on to the footy, what stand do you sit in at tynie? Used to be the Wheatfield but I gave up my season ticket last season, shocking I know! Have been to a few games this season and thankfully got a derby ticket. Season ticket back next season though. I never thought I'd miss it so much! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maroonlegions Posted March 5, 2009 Author Share Posted March 5, 2009 Thanks I did, thankfully it wasn't winter or I'd have been hobbling home in the snow! Now that would have been a nightmare, glad is was not snowing for you though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikki 74 Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 having stayed next door to you nikki you don't drink ha ha Very true Mick, we have never sat in your garden in the summer knocking back booze and pizza Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby_swing_the_bar Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I'm sober at the minute so i dont believe you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.J Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 ha ha! aye quite right about getting the trainers on to the footy, what stand do you sit in at tynie? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Used to be the Wheatfield but I gave up my season ticket last season, shocking I know! Have been to a few games this season and thankfully got a derby ticket. Season ticket back next season though. I never thought I'd miss it so much! bad lass ha ha! got my ticket for easter road also. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jambomickey Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Very true Mick, we have never sat in your garden in the summer knocking back booze and pizza that was you nikki! i just had juice and pizza ha ha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Romanov Saviour of HMFC Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Merse Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Spewed on a bus with a hangover. Not my proudest moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
conn artist Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 while ago last year was on the bus coming down leith street and there was this bevvied south african guy being a complete dobber to everyone around him. he was not holdin onto the railing and as the bus swung round the large roundabout to go onto london road he went flying into the exit doorwell in a heap and decided it would be better for him to stay there as if no-one had seen him. the whole first floor had seen it and was creasing it at him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JP1874 Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 I have also slid down the stairs on a First bus - No wonder they got warning signs up now! I was on a 16 at newhaven a few years ago and was in a wee world of my own staring dead ahead. Then had a wee snigger at something i remembered. These 2 guys a couple rows infront turned round & started asking what i found so funny? No idea what they had been talking about but must have seemed i was listening in. Told them i was thinking of something that had happened to me earlier that day, don't think they bought it, got off at Ocean Terminal & waited on next bus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanley_ Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Managed to make it onto a bus in Glasgow at the last minute and got my leg shut in the door. Fell over on a bus recently as well. Thankfully there was hardly anyone on at the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
269miles Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 while ago last year was on the bus coming down leith street and there was this bevvied south african guy being a complete dobber to everyone around him. he was not holdin onto the railing and as the bus swung round the large roundabout to go onto london road he went flying into the exit doorwell in a heap and decided it would be better for him to stay there as if no-one had seen him. the whole first floor had seen it and was creasing it at him. Reminds me of the time I was on a bus back from the city centre in the late evening. An old guy , who was absolutely wrecked and standing by the doors hit the 'stop' button even though the bus was only about 10 yards from his stop. The driver slammed on the anchors and the old guy went flying down the bus and crashed into the windscreen before collapsing , semi conscious in a heap on the floor. Everyone was wetting themselves at this point until we all noticed the old guy had also wet himself , big time. There was a tsunami of urine sloshing about the bus floor. PS I don't think he was Pat Stanton. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JWL Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 I followed through on a bus as it was going across the Forth Bridge and had to walk past everyone reekin of shoit as I was in the back seat:th_sad: It was in 1976,when you were allowed to shoit yir drawers:clown: I'm going to forward that on to the guys in Sullem Voe Eggo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecjambo Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Last year after a Hearts game I went for a few drinks with my cousin and the old man firstly at a pub then back to my cousins for a few more beers. Ended up a bit pished. So me and my Dad left to head down towards Haymarket as he was getting the train home to Bathgate and I was getting the bus to East Calder. So wondering down towards the bus stop I see a 27 bus and I think Ill be getting on that. So I started to run for it and as it pulled away from the bus stop instead of me stopping and waiting for the next one I run after it. Next thing I know im flat on my face, scrapped my face off the ground and a hole in my glove. The people of that bus must have had a great laugh at me as the bus pulled away. Just to add insult to injury when I did get on the next bus I fell asleep, woke up thought I was away past East Calder so hit the button ran down the stairs then noticed we were just coming into Kirknewton. Just had to explain to the driver that I never wanted off just now and he just told me to sit down instead of standing about like a right *****. All in all not one of my better experiences. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Strange, I was of the same opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.J Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Strange, I was of the same opinion. So..................what are you wearing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lookoutjoe Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 I spewed on the bus to Uni one Monday morning after an all day Sunday session. The bus was absolutely roasting and packed and I could feel it coming but I was only a couple of stops before getting of so I just tried to survive. I managed to catch the first lot in my mouth and swallow it but the second lot escaped exorcist style. I sheepishly apologised to the guy in the suit beside me as spew dripped of the seat in front onto his trousers and walked the rest of the way to Uni. And the lecture had been cancelled. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 So..................what are you wearing? Its building up to that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.J Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Its building up to that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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