Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Following on from the brilliant funniest places to wake up thread, what's the best object you've got from a night on the tiles? My flatmate woke up next to a brand new blender. He had gone to the all night Tesco at 4am and they actually agreed to serve him, and it wasn't even a Tesco Value one either Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tazio Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A slightly overweight lesbian. It's a long story, not really for the public domain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 I'm just waiting for somebody to say "crabs" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.J Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A signed and framed picture of Cliff Richard digging his garden. Seriously. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Juan Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 My best mates sisters pants....needless to say he wasnt too chuffed! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brandt Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A big box of toilet roll. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.J Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Oh aye, and an entire (ungutted) trout. They don't let me forget that one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tommythejambo Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Everything remotely removable whilst walking from Portobello to Northfield. E.g. Streetsigns, a big poster outside Kwik Fit, directions for runners (must have been some event on). Also discarded some of it in teh street outside my house. Also once the guy making the deliveries for Greggs in Portobello said me and my mate could help ourselves to stuff. Needless to say I woke up the next morning to a fridge full of pies, bridies and steak bakes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest gorgie kev Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A sausage of the day sign from the grosvener pub:eek: An Italian flag from bar roma:eek: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A traffic cone... I would imagine I'm not the first! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Brow Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A giant leather banner advertising the fact that some **** from Eastenders and SPandeu Ballet was opening a club up town. That made the evening news. Banners still under my bed somewhere! The xmas decorations of the local neighbourhood watch presidents house and top of his garage. Including a lifesize plastic snowman and a reindeer (he was smaller than actual). This was reported in the Scotsman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 I managed to leave a pub with SIX pint glasses and a set of cutlery in my handbag Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottish_chicP Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I managed to leave a pub with SIX pint glasses and a set of cutlery in my handbag I used to go out every Thursday and steal glasses from the same pub (they were cool glasses). Built up some collection over a while!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freebird Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Me and a few mates ended up "borrowing" some chairs from the Shandon a few years ago. The taxi driver wouldn't let us in the taxi with them cos they wouldn't fit, so I had to sit on one inside the taxi. On the way home, my mate opened the window and while the taxi turned a corner, the chair tilted and I nearly fell out the bloody thing. Good times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 I have a fantastic collection now, I started stocking up before I moved into my flat in fears we wouldn't have enough. I endeavour to get one of every kind ie. my collection already includes Tennants, Guinness, Coors, Strongbow, Stella (2 varieties), Magners, Magners Comedy Festival... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legend Claws Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A park bench, complete with dedication plate. We put it back the next night undercover of darkness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 Me and a few mates ended up "borrowing" some chairs from the Shandon a few years ago. The taxi driver wouldn't let us in the taxi with them cos they wouldn't fit, so I had to sit on one inside the taxi. On the way home, my mate opened the window and while the taxi turned a corner, the chair tilted and I nearly fell out the bloody thing. Good times. I stole a couple of chairs from outside a restaurant ages ago, must have been on Hanover street or something. Funny thing is, I wasn't drunk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
speedbump Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A shopping trolly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bn jambo Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A five foot plastic ice-cream cone, well technically a 99 it did have a flake and my favourite was a policemans hat, it fell of while he was struggling with someone and it now sits on top of my homer simpson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Romanov Saviour of HMFC Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 One of they big umbrellas from outside a pub, it was a Strongbow one. Also found a chopstick down the back of my jeans and a bra in my pocket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milky_26 Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 some people i know have had bar stools golf club hole markers (i think thats what they are called) gnomes countless glasses but the best one was a post office sign, one of the luminous ones that go on the outside of the building and stick out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freebird Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I stole a couple of chairs from outside a restaurant ages ago, must have been on Hanover street or something. Funny thing is, I wasn't drunk Haha, did you just get that sudden urge we all get sometimes to nick some chairs?! Would've been even better if there were other folk sitting outside eating! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
northfieldhearts Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Number 7 Flag from Porty Golf Course - i used the 8th to wipe my ar$e! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 It was actually in broad daylight as well! I can't even remember why I did it. I may have a problem ... ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adi Dassler Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I woke up with a drum once, an actual proper drum from part of a drum kit. Think we sneaked it out the back door of Whistle Binkies. My brother and his mates caused a bit of a diplomatic incident a few years ago when they stole the Flag from the Chinese Embassy in Corstorphine. That also made the papers. I'm sure me and somebody else off here, a Superstar, went on the rob one xmas a few years ago stealing inflatables Santas etc from peoples gardens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freebird Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 It was actually in broad daylight as well!I can't even remember why I did it. I may have a problem ... ! I'd call it more a quirk. Think of it like Tourettes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1874M Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Pocket full of dead crickets in Thailand Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 I'd call it more a quirk. Think of it like Tourettes. Like funny, but in a tragic way? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freebird Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Like funny, but in a tragic way? Kinda. More it like it might annoy you, but I guarantee it amuses everyone around you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamdub Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 My best mates sisters pants....needless to say he wasnt too chuffed! I take it your mates a Hobo, knowing his sisters scanties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuart Lyon Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Louise you don't have a problem - you have problems! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ArmiyaRomanova Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A six-foot tall heavy wooden 'photographic cut-out' figure of a coal miner. No recollection of where it came from either - not the sort of thing you find lying about on the street. Or was it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adi Dassler Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Another lad off here tried to steal the traffic lights (the bit with the button you press) outside Torphicen Street Police Station and was promptly nicked for his trouble. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H J Simpson Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I woke up with a copy of Cannonball Run on Video about a year ago, I liberated it from a pub in Glasgow. No I don't know either why a pub had 7 vhs cassetes from the 70's / 80's lying about either. I did contemplate exchanging it next time I went to the pub but the other 6 videos were all crap!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victorian Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 i awoke one morning to be reminded that i had just taken possession of one corner flag and part of a dugout from a football stadium which is fairly familiar to most people on here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I'M IBRAHIM TALL Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 An ASBO, i'm ashamed to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Some blonde lassies purse. Was only recently actually. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
speedbump Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 i awoke one morning to be reminded that i had just taken possession of one corner flag and part of a dugout from a football stadium which is fairly familiar to most people on here. I've got one of those as well:cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
speedbump Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Some blonde lassies purse. Was only recently actually. Did you empty it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BASIL_HEARTS Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 once woke up with a golf flag on my bed lol. The states you get yourself into eh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 Did you empty it? There wouldn't have been much in it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 There wouldn't have been much in it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
speedbump Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 There wouldn't have been much in it Was it yours? Have I stumbled across a legal kickback romance:eek: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 I'm not aware of ever having met Cigaro, it was simply implied that he may have had a hand in the theft of my purse last night Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I'M IBRAHIM TALL Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Every single bottle of milk from a vast housing in Musselburgh. 4 of us liberated them as soon as the milkman dropped them off. the number of full milk bottles (bottles mind, none of this cardboard carton rubbish) ran into 3 figures. An absolute bugger to get rid of i can assure you. I also recall 3 of us trying to "relocate" a wheelie bin as well. Must have been a quiet night down our way because by the time we had got to the end of the street, 2 police cars, 2 police vans AND a meat wagon screeched to a halt along side us. Trying to keep a straight face while an entire night shift try and make wheelie bin theft sound as serious as a major terrorist incident was not easy. Good times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
speedbump Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I'm not aware of ever having met Cigaro, it was simply implied that he may have had a hand in the theft of my purse last night Oh right, sorry:( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victorian Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 horse brass. relocated a horse brass from a public house.... without keeping the owner fully up to date about it's whereabouts. got barred.... which mystified me for weeks afterwards, until i remembered the horse brass. i'm not a collector btw. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Merse Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Hmmmm. Golf pin, the letters T and Y from the Hunters Tryst pub sign, a door off a washing machine, a x-mas tree, a bollard from the west-end, a traffic island, I forget the rest. My names David and I like to steal when I'm drunk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goose Baxter Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I stole a couple of chairs from outside a restaurant ages ago, must have been on Hanover street or something. Funny thing is, I wasn't drunk Bit of a theif are we not Louise? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Winstone Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 A potted tree and a highchair from some pub in Arbroath. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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