Can guys and girls just be friends????? Challenge!!

[Civil Jambo]

CJ - ask your girlfriend if she enjoyed our platonic sex.

 

 

 

Red card ....there is always one that goes too far!! you smelly HOBO!!!

[Rick Grimes]

men & women can be very close platonic friends, but generally only after "will we? won't we?" first wee while.

[chimpos]

On a serious note i have lots of platonic girl friends but only after we have pumped each other rotten and then got sick of it, but we still go out for a drink now and just cant be arsed.

[Civil Jambo]

On a serious note i have lots of platonic girl friends but only after we have pumped each other rotten and then got sick of it, but we still go out for a drink now and just cant be arsed.

 

 

ah this is getting more round to my point as in the straight guy does start being friends witha female unless he has an interest in pumping her first and the friendship doesnt develop until that phase has past

[Johanes de Silentio]

Sorry about this, but...

 

If I'm absolutely honest...I'd always be checking her out, and thinking..."hmm...nipples...", etc!

 

Sorry, but there it is - (straight) men hang around women 'cos they want to...er...'pump' them - you didnae really think otherwise did you?

 

I mean, even couples that are in sweet love (which is GREAT!) ...I'd bet that even the most rational, urbane, cultured, open-minded, reconstituted male's initial attraction was..."hmm...nipples...", etc!

 

I've already said sorry, but I feel obliged to say it again - SORRY!

 

Al.

 

P.S.

 

Is "nipples" allowed on this forum?

[Civil Jambo]

Sorry about this, but...

 

If I'm absolutely honest...I'd always be checking her out, and thinking..."hmm...nipples...", etc!

 

Sorry, but there it is - (straight) men hang around women 'cos they want to...er...'pump' them - you didnae really think otherwise did you?

 

I mean, even couples that are in sweet love (which is GREAT!) ...I'd bet that even the most rational, urbane, cultured, open-minded, reconstituted male's initial attraction was..."hmm...nipples...", etc!

 

I've already said sorry, but I feel obliged to say it again - SORRY!

 

Al.

 

P.S.

 

Is "nipples" allowed on this forum?

 

 

thanks for being honest if only more guys voted honestly i would be winning this vote oh btw folk the misses is a dons fan for her sins!!

[chimpos]

thanks for being honest if only more guys voted honestly i would be winning this vote oh btw folk the misses is a dons fan for her sins!!

 

sorry to hear about he missus but never mind. Fact is until you have pumped them you are never real friends, you can go out for 'a nice little drink' all you want but most geezers are always thinking about pumping them no matter what they pretend to themselves. but once it's all over you can then be good friends, as i am with all my ex girlfriends, who thought they were mates before;)

[Say What Again]

I've got female friends who are first and foremost, friends of my missus - I've got the same scenario with girls who are really friends of my sisters.

 

I could sit with only me and them if we were to chance upon each other in a pub but I'd never dream of arranging to go out with any of them just to socialise.

 

I'd better be careful here, but I do have a female friend who is technically 'my friend'. I was an usher at her wedding, and I'd be lying if I said I it hadn't crossed my mind - on several occasions.

[Say What Again]

thanks for being honest if only more guys voted honestly i would be winning this vote oh btw folk the misses is a dons fan for her sins!!

 

I've voted with you.

 

I think the bold bit may be part of your problem. There will be a few here horrified at your suggestion/sucking up to the female posters (as usual)

[chimpos]

I've voted with you.

 

I think the bold bit may be part of your problem. There will be a few here horrified at your suggestion/sucking up to the female posters (as usual)

 

i thought that was banned on football forums;)

 

sorry bev and puala (not really though)

[shaun.lawson]

thanks for being honest if only more guys voted honestly i would be winning this vote oh btw folk the misses is a dons fan for her sins!!

 

The problem here, as ever, is generalising. Whatever we might like to think, every man is different, and every woman is different: and sorry Civil Jambo, but what you've written above should in fact read "if only more guys thought like me" - because we're all being honest here!

 

I'm single, and straight. I've always preferred female company, usually in a one-to-one setting, and have tons of platonic female friends, with none of whom has pumping ever been or ever will be on the agenda. My very best friend, who knows me better than anyone I've ever known (and vice versa) is in a happy long-term relationship, but actually considers me to be her soulmate (and, again, vice versa). My best friend and I love each other deeply - but in a totally platonic way, and there's never been anything sexual there at all (and no, she's not a munter: quite the opposite).

 

I have a number of very attractive good female friends as well as her - and much the same applies there too. Indeed, platonic friendships with women are second nature to me: much more than romantic relationships, believe it or not. The reason is because I value companionship and connecting with people above all else. To date, all the sexual encounters I've had have been largely hollow and empty, and knowing myself as well as I now do, will remain so until I fall in love with someone - which I've yet to do.

 

I can only speak for myself - but in my opinion, the catastrophic over-sexualisation of the world we all live in creates images of perfection which cannot be attained, and leads to millions of people believing the only affection they can get is through meaningless sex. This simply isn't true. It also leads to misery and loneliness on a horrific scale - with many of those most lonely actually in relationships, albeit bad ones. But I never feel lonely, and feel very lucky to have the closeness, warmth and love I do in my friendships: something I think many men miss out on, because society somehow frowns on it.

 

I'm certainly not about to kid myself that I represent the 'norm', whatever that might be - far from it. We are all complex individuals, shaped by families, environments, social groups and other forces, and I'm just another. But whereas many men probably do find it impossible to form a platonic relationship with a woman without somehow wanting more, I, and many others, don't - and whenever someone tries to generalise about these things, they invariably find there is no simple answer.

[badly drawn boy]

The problem here, as ever, is generalising. Whatever we might like to think, every man is different, and every woman is different: and sorry Civil Jambo, but what you've written above should in fact read "if only more guys thought like me" - because we're all being honest here!

 

I'm single, and straight. I've always preferred female company, usually in a one-to-one setting, and have tons of platonic female friends, with none of whom has pumping ever been or ever will be on the agenda. My very best friend, who knows me better than anyone I've ever known (and vice versa) is in a happy long-term relationship, but actually considers me to be her soulmate (and, again, vice versa). My best friend and I love each other deeply - but in a totally platonic way, and there's never been anything sexual there at all (and no, she's not a munter: quite the opposite).

 

I have a number of very attractive good female friends as well as her - and much the same applies there too. Indeed, platonic friendships with women are second nature to me: much more than romantic relationships, believe it or not. The reason is because I value companionship and connecting with people above all else. To date, all the sexual encounters I've had have been largely hollow and empty, and knowing myself as well as I now do, will remain so until I fall in love with someone - which I've yet to do.

 

I can only speak for myself - but in my opinion, the catastrophic over-sexualisation of the world we all live in creates images of perfection which cannot be attained, and leads to millions of people believing the only affection they can get is through meaningless sex. This simply isn't true. It also leads to misery and loneliness on a horrific scale - with many of those most lonely actually in relationships, albeit bad ones. But I never feel lonely, and feel very lucky to have the closeness, warmth and love I do in my friendships: something I think many men miss out on, because society somehow frowns on it.

 

I'm certainly not about to kid myself that I represent the 'norm', whatever that might be - far from it. We are all complex individuals, shaped by families, environments, social groups and other forces, and I'm just another. But whereas many men probably do find it impossible to form a platonic relationship with a woman without somehow wanting more, I, and many others, don't - and whenever someone tries to generalise about these things, they invariably find there is no simple answer.

 

Gees Shaun thats a long stint to say you bat for the other side

[Say What Again]

Gees Shaun thats a long stint to say you bat for the other side

 

 

'I've always preferred female company'

 

You must be the only guy on the planet. Most guys can't wait to get shot of them on a Saturday night!*

 

* 'Most guys' meaning not poofy ones.

 

[shaun.lawson]

Gees Shaun thats a long stint to say you bat for the other side

 

 

Believe it or not, even my parents were convinced of this for ages. It got to the stage where I was so fed up with this that I found some gay calling cards at a phonebox in London, took them home, and accidentally on purpose left a few in spots round the house - just to wind them up!

 

Both my sisters are gay, and the youngest one is always telling me I'm the gayest of us all. Except that I'm not - weird, huh?

[Boaby Ewing]

I've got plenty of platonic (hot) female mates who I'm quite happy keeping it that way with. To the point where I've probably been more of an er gentleman than I might otherwise have been on occasion.

 

But if the standard is "it's never even crossed my mind" then that's an impossible ideal.

 

Christ, I've found myself sitting at work looking at my 40 odd year old female old boss wondering if it'd be worth chucking a sausage down that particular corridor.

[shaun.lawson]

 

'I've always preferred female company'

 

You must be the only guy on the planet. Most guys can't wait to get shot of them on a Saturday night!*

 

* 'Most guys' meaning not poofy ones.

 

 

No doubt my attitude may change if I ever get married. Joke: why are married men often overweight? Single men look in the fridge, see nothing they like and go to bed; married men look in the bed, see nothing they like and go to the fridge.

[chimpos]

Thing is Shaun i thought it was a joke thread???

 

But good call on lots of stuff but i myself am a single old male who has lots of female mates, but everytime time we go out i am always thinking thats great we are mates, then the longer we stay out i'm thinking that's great she's still here even though i'm drinking like an ethiopian who just discovered a water hole. then i;m totally wasted and she is still there asking me if we are getting a taxi? so like a gent i get a taxi and guess where it's going? (no not pinner) my house...the rest is history mate. After that we are the best of platonic friends, but only because we have rutted like animals.

 

(sorry ange if you are reading this but you must protect yourself, or just use distance):)

[badly drawn boy]

 

Believe it or not, even my parents were convinced of this for ages. It got to the stage where I was so fed up with this that I found some gay calling cards at a phonebox in London, took them home, and accidentally on purpose left a few in spots round the house - just to wind them up!

 

Both my sisters are gay, and the youngest one is always telling me I'm the gayest of us all. Except that I'm not - weird, huh?

 

Aye definitely weird Shaun em Aye

[badly drawn boy]

No doubt my attitude may change if I ever get married. Joke: why are married men often overweight? Single men look in the fridge, see nothing they like and go to bed; married men look in the bed, see nothing they like and go to the fridge.

 

Always wondered , good shout S

[shaun.lawson]

Thing is Shaun i thought it was a joke thread???

But good call on lots of stuff but i myself am a single old male who has lots of female mates, but everytime time we go out i am always thinking thats great we are mates, then the longer we stay out i'm thinking that's great she's still here even though i'm drinking like an ethiopian who just discovered a water hole. then i;m totally wasted and she is still there asking me if we are getting a taxi? so like a gent i get a taxi and guess where it's going? (no not pinner) my house...the rest is history mate. After that we are the best of platonic friends, but only because we have rutted like animals.

 

(sorry ange if you are reading this but you must protect yourself, or just use distance):)

 

Fair point - I'm new to the Shed!

 

I'm a bit lost though. Is it just Ange this happens with - or every platonic female friend of yours?

[chimpos]

Fair point - I'm new to the Shed!

 

I'm a bit lost though. Is it just Ange this happens with - or every platonic female friend of yours?

 

Shhhh ange is my only platonic friend at the moment. was just trying to warn her like the gent i am?

[Doctor FinnBarr]

My best mate in this world, apart from Nikki and Kay is Rhona. She lives in Buckie, just got married, to another mate and I'm like a pig in shat for the 2 of them. But before the marrage, long before, and long before I met Nik, me and Rhon would share tents with no hanky-panky. So there!

[Civil Jambo]

I've voted with you.

 

I think the bold bit may be part of your problem. There will be a few here horrified at your suggestion/sucking up to the female posters (as usual)

 

too true!!

[Civil Jambo]

I've got plenty of platonic (hot) female mates who I'm quite happy keeping it that way with. To the point where I've probably been more of an er gentleman than I might otherwise have been on occasion.

 

But if the standard is "it's never even crossed my mind" then that's an impossible ideal.

 

Christ, I've found myself sitting at work looking at my 40 odd year old female old boss wondering if it'd be worth chucking a sausage down that particular corridor.

 

 

Brilliant lol!

[The People's Chimp]

!

if they are ugly they are exempt but they they were better looking i bet your intentions would change!!

 

so you just lost your argument!

 

I know what you mean though. If the girl is fit, the pretty much 99% of the time, the guy would like to pull her. But if she isn't, then absolutely, or indeed, sometimes it goes past the pulling stage, even if they are fit, if its never happened for one reason or another.

 

I think you should rephrase your question. can a guy just be friends with an exceptionally hot girl?

[K1874M]

Unless the guys gay it cant be done.

 

hhaha true to an extent..

 

Think single guys cant but guys that are in a relationship can, like my self.

 

I used to be not able to hang about with a bird with out the thought popping in to my head but thats been tamed now, now I'm happily looked after

[Mr Nobody]

Don't believe it can be done. I have two friends that are female:-

 

the first one I have not slept with but there is something there and probably only a matter of time before we do get together.

 

The second one we are good friends but again there is something more there and we have slept together on a few occassions.

[BigC]

The only reason a guy would go out with a bird that he didn't have any inclination towards is if she he thought it would increase his chances of pulling one of her fit mates.

 

I've got 3-4 female friends that I meet up with, just the two of us. Although I probably wouldn;t want a relationship with any of them, if \i was drunk enough I'd do all of them.

[Leebo]

I agree with your girlfriend

My best mate is a guy...!! and he is straight

[Boaby Ewing]

I once had a shuffle over an old burd's flatmate who was ostensibly a mate, but was a tad too flirtatious at times.

 

Not literally likes, she was already quite accomodating about the fact I was there three or four nights a week. I think delivering a 3 am Sepp Blatter would have been taking liberties.

[trotter]

guys can indeed go out with girls alone with no intention of anything coming from it. I've got lots of girl mates so I do it all the time.

 

Even so, my best mate is a girl, she's the most gorgeous girl i've ever met, she's funny, she's outrageously sexy and her mind is the filthiest i've come across (not literally ). We've fancied each other for years but we both know it would never work so it doesn't bother us to go out just the two of us and do dinner, drinks or whatever.

[Gavsy Van Gaverson]

I once had plenty of female friends.

 

I pumped them all.

 

So, to sumarise - no men and women can't just be friends.

 

[Civil Jambo]

I once had plenty of female friends.

 

I pumped them all.

 

So, to sumarise - no men and women can't just be friends.

 

 

Nice lol! and it backs my argument!!

[championsleaguefan]

I will go out with you bird to check if she is a good mate for men. Can't garentee I won't check if she is a good pump though.

[jambo-rocker]

i would say that you's are both right.

 

I think it more depends on the type of person. There can be people how can go out for a drink and not fancy them at all and there are people that are the opposite and cant go out for a drink with each other without wanting something to happen out of it.

 

I would fall into second category. I fall too easily for nice looking women who have conversations with me and it annoys me. i need to develop some thicker skin in that department

[Helzibob]

Yes it is possible. I am straight and female and probably half my friends are straight men. We always go out for drinks, dinner, cinema etc with nothing romantic going on.

[doctor jambo]

Probably not

Even when I thought the relationship was platonic (ie it was on my part), the women eventually all made moves, which kind of scuppers the whole thing, as women dont like being rebuffed at all.

[Jambo_LuLu]

Absolutley can be platonic friendship between a man and a woman. I have loads of male mates and I have became friends with a lot of their girlfriends! I would happily go out for a meal/drink with MOST of my male friends with neither party thinking it is anything more than friendship!! That is complete honesty!!

[Helzibob]

Probably not

Even when I thought the relationship was platonic (ie it was on my part), the women eventually all made moves, which kind of scuppers the whole thing, as women dont like being rebuffed at all.

 

Maybe you are just irresistable to the opposite sex.

[doctor jambo]

Maybe you are just irresistable to the opposite sex.

 

Friends of girlfriends are/were the worst

As soon as you become single again the whole platonic facade drops

On the bright side the wifes best mate is stunning....

[redm]

Friends are surely just friends, whether male or female? Most of us know the difference.

 

It's interesting to note from this thread that it's the men who have the issues with this, not the ladies....

[Maroon Mayhem]

I would say a much lessor percentage of girls than guys would have a problem with this. Just the genetic make-up.

[eddie fenwick]

an ex from years ago got in touch 4 or 5 years ago and we keep in constant contact now,were both married and our kids are all friends,the 2 families even went on holiday together 2 year ago,infact her and her husband are coming over to us on friday night

[PsychocAndy]

No can't be done.

When I was young and single I had a good few female mates and would go for drinks, the fit ones I'd fantasize about before and after drinks the other ones, beautiful people that they were, once the beer goggles were on, well!