Guest GhostHunter Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 An unnamed football club have approached a leading sports scientist in an effort to apply genetic research to their players. It is the first known instance of football exploring genetics in order to gain sporting advantage.According to Aberdeen University's Dr Henning Wackerhage, the club were seeking to gain "an edge" by attempting to discern through a genetic test their players' suitability for sprinting. They hoped to discover whether the players had been born with the ACTN3 gene that is common to all top-class sprinters. However, the club's intention to use the test results in team selections is opposed by the World Anti-Doping Agency, which stated in 2005: "The use of genetic information to select for or discriminate against athletes should be strongly discouraged." Wackerhage - who refused to identify the club - informed them that Wada's ethical stance should be binding, telling them he would not carry out the test. "My advice was that there are questions of legality, with an employer doing genetic tests on its employees," said Wackerhage, who has other ethical concerns over the collection of genetic data, noting that it could be difficult to maintain confidentiality of test results for high-profile athletes. The test is commercially available in Australia and it is unknown whether the club pursued the procedure there. http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/apr/25/3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JamboRobbo Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Sounds like a Vlad scheme to me. We've gotta be the favourites. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GhostHunter Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Sounds like a Vlad scheme to me. We've gotta be the favourites. Yup - that's my thoughts as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drylaw Hearts Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/apr/25/3 It has Mad-Vlad written all over it. Hello Dolly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Domokun Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 This is brilliant news. Give it 18 years and we will have grown ourselves a CL winning team! Not quite 5 years, Vlad, but kudos for the vision. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JamboRobbo Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 This is brilliant news. Give it 18 years and we will have grown ourselves a CL winning team! Assuming we don't get in trouble for playing 11 clones of Miko.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GhostHunter Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Wasn't there a Russian team in the 80's who were accused of pumping out "robot-like" players year after year ? Wasn't a certain Madofeeb involved in said club ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon 1874 Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Na maybe not, have you seen Rankers & Smeltic players lately? has to be either one of them, all look the same to me, genetic engineering gone wrong methinks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drylaw Hearts Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Wasn't there a Russian team in the 80's who were accused of pumping out "robot-like" players year after year ? Wasn't a certain Madofeeb involved in said club ? Were they not Romanian ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GhostHunter Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Na maybe not, have you seen Rankers & Smeltic players lately? has to be either one of them, all look the same to me, genetic engineering gone wrong methinks No, that's inbreeding. There's a difference you know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1874M Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 I've heard there trying to grow an extra leg on to Clums back.... and an extra arm for banksy..... hopefully they will be ready for next season... Que photo shop experts! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon 1874 Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 No, that's inbreeding. There's a difference you know. As the old saying go's, you learn from your mistakes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S2H Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 This is brilliant news. Give it 18 years and we will have grown ourselves a CL winning team! Not quite 5 years, Vlad, but kudos for the vision. You might just have struck gold here... Hear me out. The CL final is in Moscow, right? Vlad, being of Russian descent, we can assume has contacts and friends in high places out there. So, Vlad's secret agents gain access to both dressing rooms at this year's CL final, taking DNA samples from each pair of underpants. As everyone knows, all professional players still get their names stitched in their undergarments by their mothers, thus making each DNA sample identifiable as belonging to a certain player. Vlad selects the DNA from the best performers in the final, in effect creating a best of both teams side, then clones them! As you suggested, in about 20 years time, we have a CL winning team on our hands! Unorthodox, granted, but you can't deny the genius of the man. Believe!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GhostHunter Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Maybe VladFlu is actually a reaction to genetic injections given to the players.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drylaw Hearts Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 You might just have struck gold here... Hear me out. The CL final is in Moscow, right? Vlad, being of Russian descent, we can assume has contacts and friends in high places out there. So, Vlad's secret agents gain access to both dressing rooms at this year's CL final, taking DNA samples from each pair of underpants. As everyone knows, all professional players still get their names stitched in their undergarments by their mothers, thus making each DNA sample identifiable as belonging to a certain player. Vlad selects the DNA from the best performers in the final, in effect creating a best of both teams side, then clones them! As you suggested, in about 20 years time, we have a CL winning team on our hands! Unorthodox, granted, but you can't deny the genius of the man. Believe!! The downside is they'll all look like... Unacceptable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S2H Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 The downside is they'll all look like... Unacceptable. This calls for a poll. "Would you accept an HMFC CL winning side if they all looked like Michael Jackson?" I'm really undecided.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drylaw Hearts Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 This calls for a poll. "Would you accept an HMFC CL winning side if they all looked like Michael Jackson?" I'm really undecided.... With Rixxy as Manager ? No thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rods Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Like universal soldiers Mind you Zal already looks like Dolph Lungdren Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auldreekie1874 Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 So, Australia for our pre-season then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcat Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 To attempt to add a modicum of seriousness to this discussion The idea of this form of genetic testing being used as an aid to selection will be very unlikely to have a serious impact at senior level. If you want to find out how fast a sprinter an adult is you do it with a stopwatch rather than measuring their levels of ACTN3. Where it might have an impact is withyouth development programmes. Big clubs are already investing large amounts of money shipping teenage boys from all over the world into Academies in Europe. In these cases it's not how fast/strong/big they are now that is the issue it's how fast/strong/big they could become. Given the ruthless and unregulated state of the 'talent development' industry in Africa (Where coincidentally the distribution of ACTN3 is wider) it would be somewhat surprising if this technology didn't begin to get used by the various people involved in the search for the next Drogba or Eto'o. In fact it may be already. Luckily there's more to Football than merely being a good sprinter (Which was unfortunate for Wayne Foster). People of many shapes and sizes can excel (Even Peter Crouch) so this particular test is not liable to have a huge impact on the game. In Other sports however it could have a lot more impact. Obviously there's little point in accepting sprinters into "elite development programmes" if their genetics mean they're never going to make it. Ot alternatively, If you've got a scholarship to hand to one of two 6 foot 4, 15 year old basketball players then it would be an advantage to know that one of them had already reached their full adult height while the other will probably reach six foot 10. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 I've heard there trying to grow an extra leg on to Clums back.... and an extra arm for banksy..... hopefully they will be ready for next season... Que photo shop experts! Not got it on this computer unfortunately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 You might just have struck gold here... Hear me out. The CL final is in Moscow, right? Vlad, being of Russian descent, we can assume has contacts and friends in high places out there. So, Vlad's secret agents gain access to both dressing rooms at this year's CL final, taking DNA samples from each pair of underpants. As everyone knows, all professional players still get their names stitched in their undergarments by their mothers, thus making each DNA sample identifiable as belonging to a certain player. Vlad selects the DNA from the best performers in the final, in effect creating a best of both teams side, then clones them! As you suggested, in about 20 years time, we have a CL winning team on our hands! Unorthodox, granted, but you can't deny the genius of the man. Believe!! Real-life Space Jam? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
werwolf Posted April 25, 2008 Share Posted April 25, 2008 Assuming we don't get in trouble for playing 11 clones of Miko.... This board would go into meltdown if that happended Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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