Jakie Lochenders

[Markie]

Was walking home from work today and in front of me was a Lochender with a big wet patch on the erse of his trousers (wasn't having a look but you couldn't miss the patch). When I finaly got past him, he stunk of ****!

 

Only in Lochend!!!!

 

I think he maybe went to see Hibs train and **** himself with how bad they are

 

:107years:

[Carl Weathers]

[The People's Chimp]

Was walking home from work today and in front of me was a Lochender with a big wet patch on the erse of his trousers (wasn't having a look but you couldn't miss the patch). When I finaly got past him, he stunk of ****!

 

Only in Lochend!!!!

 

I think he maybe went to see Hibs train and **** himself with how bad they are

 

:107years:

 

I do beg to differ, sir! A fife emigr? as I am, I scooped up a pair of tickets kidly offered to me to attend the Association Football Cup final between the pars and ra sellik, 06/07 season. Sadly ra sellik did their usual dick turpin impression and this led to mass displays of jakiness in the streets of Glasgow's southside. One delightful chap, a ned of around 20 years, and his chums were attempting the half cut foxtrot, the glasgow two step, while waving republican flags and singing their usual delights, and of course, regaling all and sundry with their wonderful badinage and witticisms.

 

Unfortunately for chap number one he appeared to have what was a large, approximately hand sized, brown greasy wet spot on his jeans, yet danced along the road in front of us, for quite some time, in a state of blissful disregard for his predicament; that he'd sh at himself.

 

So, sir, I can only offer this revision to your proposition:

 

"Only in Lochend...and Glasgow!!!"