Jump to content

Ending a relationship


Robbos Right Peg

Recommended Posts

Robbos Right Peg

'A friend of mine' asked me when you know when things just are not right with a woman (or you are just bored with her and the football starts again soon) how do you tell her ? He is a kind and considerate guy GSH ;) so whats the nicest way you have binned a tart (obviously I am not the kind and considerate one)

 

Please no 'ye've been pumped so beat it' comments

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I P Knightley
'A friend of mine' asked me when you know when things just are not right with a woman (or you are just bored with her and the football starts again soon) how do you tell her ? He is a kind and considerate guy GSH ;) so whats the nicest way you have binned a tart (obviously I am not the kind and considerate one)

 

Please no 'ye've been pumped so beat it' comments

 

erm... get her pumped?

 

 

 

I've always taken the cowardly route. Get hooked up with other birds and let her find out so that she dumps you.

 

At least it assures continuity of hole.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Robbos Right Peg
The letter.

 

Dear ,

 

Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.

 

Bye.

 

Would that be a first or second class stamp on that letter ? Also I am led to believe that women might not even be allowed to leave the kitchen to pick up the post of a morning so how does this approach work exactly ?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

right your dumped on one bum cheek, and she's pumped on the other....

 

 

then video record your self pumping her mate/mum/both and send it to her.

 

Should hit the nail on the napper.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Next time you're with her, look puzzled and start going through your pockets. Keep looking puzzled and start searching around the room. When she asks you what you're looking for tell her you've lost your feelings for her.

 

(zing!)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

tell her you're now gay, and its all her fault

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

actually don't, cos she might just kill you.........

Link to comment
Share on other sites

scottishguy
tell her you're now gay, and its all her fault

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

actually don't, cos she might just kill you.........

 

 

That's justy really funny:):wacko::)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

tell her you're now gay, and its all her fault

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

actually don't, cos she might just kill you.........

 

Superb.

 

That's a winner.

 

Go with that.

 

Or, pump one of her mates. Maybe her mum?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Superb.

 

That's a winner.

 

Go with that.

 

Or, pump one of her mates. Maybe her mum?

 

or get her dad pumped??

 

would make a point AND prove he wasn't lying :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Professor.Arturo

Just be honest, tell her "look, your giving me the right hump, why dont you bog off and haunt someone else" :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Old Tolbooth

Tell her (or get your mate to tell her) your sick of having to take viagra because she no longer has what it takes to turn you on, I would duck after it though!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Captain America

When you are next out with a group of friends, tell them all to sit down and ask "hands up who all has a bf/gf? and as she goes to raise her hand just say "not so fast love"

 

;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Studs Mate

Its a pity Picky Bums suspended at the mo, he would be able to help us out with this thread:)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

thank her for all her hard work as caretaker girlfriend but tell her it`s time you moved in a different direction and are currently viewing candidates with a little more "experience"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Say What Again
When you are next out with a group of friends, tell them all to sit down and ask "hands up who all has a bf/gf? and as she goes to raise her hand just say "not so fast love"

 

;)

 

Ha ha. I like that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Nephilim Scotty
'A friend of mine' asked me when you know when things just are not right with a woman.....

Usually about 6 months after the wedding.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tell her that you have noticed she has "let herself go " a wee bit lately and that you no longer find her very attractive,preferably over the phone.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tell her that you have noticed she has "let herself go " a wee bit lately and that you no longer find her very attractive,preferably over the phone.

 

over the phone - in another country.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Future's Maroon

Just be straight to the point, tell her you cannae be bothered with her anymore and want more time to yourself....for drinking, football, gambling and of course adding a few more marks on your bedpost?!

 

Or tell her you fancy her mum and think she's a MILF and want to try your luck with her - ask her if she would be willing to join in a three-some?!

 

p.s have a taxi waiting (engine running) at the front door also!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Robbos Right Peg
over the phone - in another country.

 

Uncanny Salvatore. Suffice to say that both Lenbit and my friend have punted a cheeky girl this week-end. Happy days

 

Now how long before Vlad gets shot of his Romanian friend ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

'A friend of mine' asked me when you know when things just are not right with a woman (or you are just bored with her and the football starts again soon) how do you tell her ? He is a kind and considerate guy GSH ;) so whats the nicest way you have binned a tart (obviously I am not the kind and considerate one)

 

Please no 'ye've been pumped so beat it' comments

 

 

Does this mean that "your friend" is now looking for both a girlfriend and cleaner.;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Be a man and just stop answering her calls / emails / knocks at the door.

 

She'll get the message.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Give her the auld "It's not you , it's me" Pesh...She'll know it's her but won't argue incase you tell her what she already knows...She's put on weight and turned inta a naggin cow!!

 

Then, bye!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.



×
×
  • Create New...