That-Day-In-May Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Right folks, do yer worst…😂 I asked Shaun Maloney to lend me a fiver yesterday. He said, “Sorry, I’m a little short.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trotter Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Adapted from another: Went in to the library the other day, asked the lady behind the desk if she had a book on how Shaun Maloney has sex. She gives me a look of disgust and says, "How could you stoop so ******* low?". I replied, "Aye, that's the one". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpruceBringsteen Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 38 minutes ago, trotter said: Adapted from another: Went in to the library the other day, asked the lady behind the desk if she had a book on how Shaun Maloney has sex. She gives me a look of disgust and says, "How could you stoop so ******* low?". I replied, "Aye, that's the one". Few times on this website do I actually chuckle. Fair play. 👍 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ri Alban Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 SM walks up to a bird in a bar and asks"What do you say to a little feck? She says "Hello, little feck!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TyphoonJambo Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 It's not a joke as such but the "Father Ted" small or far away sketch always makes me think of wee SM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamboozy Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Another poetic license one: Shaun fancied a shot on a horse, he gets on and the horse gathers speed, he feels his feet slipping off the stirrups , he is getting pulled back and forward by the wildly galloping horse, his life is flashing before his eyes, just when he thinks’ this is it’. The manager of Tesco came over and unplugged it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BEDNAR BOY Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Stand up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Potter Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 we jambos are never short of jokes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandyk Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 After a hard day at training, wee Shaun likes nothing better than to get home, crack open a beer and run himself a nice, hot sink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hmfc_liam06 Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Grow up guys… Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buzzbomb1958 Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Wee Dangermouse was going fishing but was left disappointed when he arrived at the bottom of the garden cos all the toadstools were taken…….. boom boom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AllyjamboDerbyshire Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 41 minutes ago, hmfc_liam06 said: Grow up guys… That's the best one yet, just didn't know Maloney's nickname was 'guys'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
That-Day-In-May Posted February 6, 2022 Author Share Posted February 6, 2022 2 hours ago, jamboozy said: Another poetic license one: Shaun fancied a shot on a horse, he gets on and the horse gathers speed, he feels his feet slipping off the stirrups , he is getting pulled back and forward by the wildly galloping horse, his life is flashing before his eyes, just when he thinks’ this is it’. The manager of Tesco came over and unplugged it 😂😂brilliant!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 1 hour ago, hmfc_liam06 said: Grow up guys… That's big of you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamanov Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 I know this thread is just lighthearted fun but please remember Shaun is a human being with feelings. He is actually a friend of mine and I popped in to see him last night. He was a bit stressed and was just trying to relax by stretching out on a foot stool. “I know you’re a bit low” I said but don’t think that helped. 😎 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 3 and a half year deal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armageddon Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 His 42 month contract that he’s 6 weeks into. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armageddon Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 8 minutes ago, Sooperstar said: 3 and a half year deal. I should read some posts before posting 🤦🏻♂️ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooperstar Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Just now, Armageddon said: I should read some posts before posting 🤦🏻♂️ Failing to see out his contract won't be the first time he has come up short. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wrinkly Ninja Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Maloney and Caldwell are in a brothel. Caldwell is having trouble getting it up. Worse, he can hear Moloney in the next room having the time of his life…..one, two, threee aaaah….one, two, three oohhhh…..one, two, three yaaooohhw. Caldwell finally gives up on little Gary, gets his stuff together. As he’s shutting the door Maloney is coming out next door and says “so how did you get on?” Caldwell say “terrible boss, I couldn’t get a hard on”. Maloney says “ Hard on? I couldn’t even get on the ******* bed!!! “. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
westbow Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Jesus guys he had a tough upbringing. Those Jambutty mines at Knotty Ash we’re harsh. One for the over fifties there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Portable Badger Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 2 minutes ago, The Wrinkly Ninja said: Maloney and Caldwell are in a brothel. Caldwell is having trouble getting it up. Worse, he can hear Moloney in the next room having the time of his life…..one, two, threee aaaah….one, two, three oohhhh…..one, two, three yaaooohhw. Caldwell finally gives up on little Gary, gets his stuff together. As he’s shutting the door Maloney is coming out next door and says “so how did you get on?” Caldwell say “terrible boss, I couldn’t get a hard on”. Maloney says “ Hard on? I couldn’t even get on the ******* bed!!! “. 😂 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wrinkly Ninja Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 5 hours ago, ri Alban said: SM walks up to a bird in a bar and asks"What do you say to a little feck? She says "Hello, little feck!" What’s SM short for? He’s got wee legs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unknown user Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 1 minute ago, The Wrinkly Ninja said: What’s SM short for? He’s got wee legs! There it is! I was going to join in but I decided to be the bigger man. (He's an inch taller than me!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unknown user Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 I hope he doesn't see this thread, he'll get all stressed and have to go home and run himself a nice hot sink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Someone (sorry can’t recall who) on a thread yesterday said hibs fans saying he’s out of his depth reply from another jkb’er aye, in a puddle 🤣 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 4 minutes ago, Smithee said: I hope he doesn't see this thread, he'll get all stressed and have to go home and run himself a nice hot sink. 🤣🤣 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ronald Villiers Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Maloney used to go out with a girl that had 12 nipples. Sounds weird....dozen tit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Say what you like about him, he’s never been one to look down on others Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 And he’s had tough times in his life, sometimes struggles to put food on the table Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 He Sat next to a wee pal after yesterday’s game who offered him some weed ‘thanks pal, let’s get medium’ Sorry 😬 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gorgie Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Why does Shaun Maloney laugh when running? The grass tickles his balls Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Hibs fans asking how he got the job… first name on the shortlist Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 2 minutes ago, Sir Craig Gordon said: Why does Shaun Maloney laugh when running? The grass tickles his balls 🤣🤣🤣 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swanny17 Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Doesn’t pay VAT on his clothing purchases. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJT Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 3 minutes ago, Swanny17 said: Doesn’t pay VAT on his clothing purchases. Big Ron can say what he likes to Shaun as it goes right over his head Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armageddon Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Shaun Maloney still lives with his parents, he can’t get a foot on the property ladder. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hearts007 Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 These jokes will just go right over his head Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deid Heid Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 A human, an elf and a dwarf walk into a bar... Shaun Maloney laughs and walks under it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deid Heid Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Why did Shaun Maloney fall He had a Frodoian slip Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vlad Magic Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 1 hour ago, topsport said: Someone (sorry can’t recall who) on a thread yesterday said hibs fans saying he’s out of his depth reply from another jkb’er aye, in a puddle 🤣 I have to take the credit for the puddle reply 😇 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vlad Magic Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Sean Maloney was fired from his previous job in an abattoir. The steaks were just to high for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chester copperpot Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Not a joke but......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niblick1874 Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 How about his hair? Can we make jokes about his hair? Maybe tell him to get it cut? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
samgolden Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 Breaking News ! Sean Maloney walked into the tallest model in the world Ekaterina Lisina (Russia), who is 205.16 cm (6 ft 8.77 in) and ended up in Hospital at A&E sporting a huge crack on his head Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jambo in Bathgate Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 (edited) It’s not good to laugh at a condemned man! He reminds me of Cathro. He’ll be lucky to see out the season. Let’s laugh at Hibs! Going to cost them a fortune! 😂😂😂 Edited February 6, 2022 by Jambo in Bathgate Addition Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
copa-mundial Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 I crashed my car into the back of Maloneys car last night. He got out and said "I'm not happy" I said "which one are you then?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No Idle Talk Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 When you're just two foot high And when Sibbick says bye That's Maloney When you've wee body parts And you can't catch the Hearts That's Maloney When you're built like a gnome And your fans stay at home That's Maloney Arse too close to the floor And you've no won in four That's Maloney! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ri Alban Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 (edited) CompetentValuableIndochinahogdeer-mobile.mp4 Taxi for Maloney. Edited February 6, 2022 by ri Alban Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Factuer Moi Posted February 6, 2022 Share Posted February 6, 2022 What is 34.5? No not Hibs total for the season................ A 69 for Maloney Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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