Cardboard cut outs and canned crowds

[Lord Beni of Gorgie]

Struggling to get any enjoyment from football,  and these turd polishing measures make it worse for me.

 

NBA seem to have the best stab at it, indoors I suppose easier to get the acoustic and ambiance. 

 

With some setbacks globally I think crowds returning could be delayed. 

 

IF that is the case,  how should Hearts deck out Tynecastle. Some pathetic looking efforts yesterday at dressing 

[busby1985]

Canned crowds is the worst. What’s wrong with hearing what the players say. I find that more entertaining than canned burnley chants. 
 

[Ex member of the SaS]

Hopefully they don't go down the route of cardboard cut outs with fans paying £25 to get their mugs on them. As you say the attempts so far have been cringe worthy. Kangaroo's FFS! Personally I would cover the seats with huge banners saying ONLY Hearts and take your medicine.

[Boof]

Hope we've got some canned booing for referees, linemen, 4th officials, opposition team lines, journalists and SPFL/SFA officials looking for a free watch of a game. Every one of those ***** can pay to get in. In fact that Doncaster ***** should pay for himself and security guards for the 8 seats surrounding him.

[3fingersreid]

Get the big flag out , covers a big area , looks good and if on the TV will remind a certain team of a certain day 🇱🇻🇱🇻🇱🇻🇱🇻🇱🇻

[colinmaroon]

12 minutes ago, Sir Gio said:

Struggling to get any enjoyment from football,  and these turd polishing measures make it worse for me.

 

NBA seem to have the best stab at it, indoors I suppose easier to get the acoustic and ambiance. 

 

With some setbacks globally I think crowds returning could be delayed. 

 

IF that is the case,  how should Hearts deck out Tynecastle. Some pathetic looking efforts yesterday at dressing 

 

More expensive but huge banners over the seats, with "appropriate" messages on them.  For example,

 

"Blood doesn't show on a maroon jersey."

"Lest we forget!"

The number of Hearts victories v Hibs comparison

"Only Hearts!"

Robbo, Rudi, Dave MacKay, 5-1 2012, etc.

 

Aye, and the Big Flag as suggested.

 

Edited August 2, 2020 by colinmaroon

[Gershwin]

Can we round up some of our angriest fans, book a soundbooth and record a rousing rendition of 'Neil Doncaster, yer a ______ ' to be played on loop at Tynecastle this season, plz?

Edited August 2, 2020 by Gershwin

[Paolo]

10 minutes ago, busby1985 said:

Canned crowds is the worst. What’s wrong with hearing what the players say. I find that more entertaining than canned burnley chants. 
 

Didn’t Hibs do canned noise a couple of years ago to make Easter Road slime fuller?

[Paolo]

8 minutes ago, Boof said:

Hope we've got some canned booing for referees, linemen, 4th officials, opposition team lines, journalists and SPFL/SFA officials looking for a free watch of a game. Every one of those ***** can pay to get in. In fact that Doncaster ***** should pay for himself and security guards for the 8 seats surrounding him.

Can we not play soundtrack that goes ‘SFA wa**, wa**, wa**’?

[John Findlay]

Canned crowd noises is the same as canned laughter on tv comedy shows. Shite.

[Felix Lighter]

Congratulations to h1b5 , they achieved yet another world first yesterday, being the first club to have the canned crowd cheer twice when they scored.

Well done h1b5, I salute your innovation.

[DETTY29]

When the 4th goes in against Hibs in the semi I want to hear a Liam McLeod recording of

 

'And suddenly, it's a rout'

 

being played over the tannoy at Hampden.

[Felix Lighter]

21 minutes ago, Ex member of the SaS said:

Hopefully they don't go down the route of cardboard cut outs with fans paying £25 to get their mugs on them. As you say the attempts so far have been cringe worthy. Kangaroo's FFS! Personally I would cover the seats with huge banners saying ONLY Hearts and take your medicine.

 

If we do, I think ref Craig Thompson cut outs everywhere. With Craig recently retired he surely would have been an ever present in the stands at Tynecastle this season, being such a huge Jambo an all.  Only fair.

 

FTH

[maroonlegions]

The big flag is a must at Tynie. Also references to 22 games undefeated and 5-1. Surely this is possible.  

[Hømme]

Quite like the idea of canned laughter whenever Hibs are in possession 

[baxterd1974]

Personally I find the canned crown makes it more watchable.  The first German games without it was like watching some blokes at the pitz 

[been here before]

Its naff as **** and jist panders to the Sky generation whose only participation in watching football is through a screen.

 

As a bit of an aside I presume there is a couple of minutes delay in transmission to allow the correct buttons to be pressed?

 

The cardboard cut outs, whilst a decent moneymaker, are equally as shite although the ones of Bin Laden etc were quite funny. With a bit more planning we could have had some fun with the ER ones.

Edited August 2, 2020 by been here before

[GinRummy]

Is the big flag damaged? Almost sure I read on here that it was. 

[Andrew Gilbert Wauchope]

44 minutes ago, 3fingersreid said:

Get the big flag out , covers a big area , looks good and if on the TV will remind a certain team of a certain day 🇱🇻🇱🇻🇱🇻🇱🇻🇱🇻

 

Needs to be directly opposite the main cameras. 

[Andrew Gilbert Wauchope]

37 minutes ago, Paolo said:

Can we not play soundtrack that goes ‘SFA wa**, wa**, wa**’?

 

I listend to some of the comentary yesterday (aye, ah ken!) and Liam McLeod was constantly aoplogising for the "upseetting" language being picked up by the mikes in the ground.  My first thought was "why are you apologising?  It's not the BBC that are effing and blinding?".  But then, the BBC is sensitive to everything these days. 

 

And Liam McLeod is an arse.

[jack D and coke]

Some canned sectarian chanting would be good. 

[Anything2]

41 minutes ago, baxterd1974 said:

Personally I find the canned crown makes it more watchable.  The first German games without it was like watching some blokes at the pitz 

I thought I would hate it but you are right, the early German games were a tough watch, I lasted about 10 minutes and for some reason the canned fan noise does make it better. I think there is research to support it from cheesy sitcoms. For some reason people enjoy things more if they feel like other people are enjoying it also, even if we know it isn't real. People are weird and complex creatures. 

[Hectormasson]

1 hour ago, Ex member of the SaS said:

Hopefully they don't go down the route of cardboard cut outs with fans paying £25 to get their mugs on them. As you say the attempts so far have been cringe worthy. Kangaroo's FFS! Personally I would cover the seats with huge banners saying ONLY Hearts and take your medicine.

And f....k the spfl & the sfa & dungcaster & lie well!!!!!!!!!!

[Lord Beni of Gorgie]

1 minute ago, Anything2 said:

I thought I would hate it but you are right, the early German games were a tough watch, I lasted about 10 minutes and for some reason the canned fan noise does make it better. I think there is research to support it from cheesy sitcoms. For some reason people enjoy things more if they feel like other people are enjoying it also, even if we know it isn't real. People are weird and complex creatures. 

I know its not real and what I can't get out of my mind. Sounds a lot better watching the NBA, very much a controlled environment. 

 

They have the virtual fans presumably beaming in by webcam. They are of course used to playing with a soundtrack in any case. 

[Lord Beni of Gorgie]

37 minutes ago, Andrew Gilbert Wauchope said:

 

I listend to some of the comentary yesterday (aye, ah ken!) and Liam McLeod was constantly aoplogising for the "upseetting" language being picked up by the mikes in the ground.  My first thought was "why are you apologising?  It's not the BBC that are effing and blinding?".  But then, the BBC is sensitive to everything these days. 

 

And Liam McLeod is an arse.

Sky constantly apologises for language. Completely with you,  its not the responsibility of the broadcaster to improve players language 

[bigsuperslim1874]

1 hour ago, Paolo said:

Didn’t Hibs do canned noise a couple of years ago to make Easter Road slime fuller?

Apparently when things were going south in the play-off game vs Hamilton they were pumping out fake crowd noises to gee the fans up. 😂

[jamboozy]

Just makes me long all the more for the time, if ever, that we can back to watching our team live.🙁

[graygo]

1 hour ago, been here before said:

Its naff as **** and jist panders to the Sky generation whose only participation in watching football is through a screen.

 

As a bit of an aside I presume there is a couple of minutes delay in transmission to allow the correct buttons to be pressed?

 

The cardboard cut outs, whilst a decent moneymaker, are equally as shite although the ones of Bin Laden etc were quite funny. With a bit more planning we could have had some fun with the ER ones.

 

It's piped directly into the ground through the pa system so no, that's why there's a bit of a delay between something happening and the "crowd" reaction.

[doctor jambo]

Wonder what Celtic will have over the tannoy for their first BCD game.............

” it was only a small minority of speakers being sectarian, and we utterly condemn what we chose to play. Despite the fact we did it, it is an problem for society in general to deal with. “

[Gambo]

St.Mirren managed to sell around 20 cut outs for yesterdays game.

[Boof]

5 minutes ago, Gambo said:

St.Mirren managed to sell around 20 cut outs for yesterdays game.

 

Was it them having a laugh about the Ann Budge one?

 

If they actually went ahead with that it's an absolute disgrace from that morally bankrupt shitehole of a club. And even if they didn't...they're still a morally bankrupt shitehole club.

[James1874f]

5 minutes ago, Boof said:

 

Was it them having a laugh about the Ann Budge one?

 

If they actually went ahead with that it's an absolute disgrace from that morally bankrupt shitehole of a club. And even if they didn't...they're still a morally bankrupt shitehole club.

Always hated them, wouldn’t give a flying one if it was them relegated ahead of UTD at end of season 

[XXX]

Advertising.

 

Match by match basis, free up space.

 

Great opportunity to make money.

[Hans Eskilsson]

3 minutes ago, The Spy Who Loved Me said:

Advertising.

 

Match by match basis, free up space.

 

Great opportunity to make money.

Probably go with this, a chance to claw back some the funds we were shafted out of 

[Craig_]

Just need two massive banners. 

 

"SPFL = CORRUPT" 

 

and

 

"DONCASTER OUT" 

[Boof]

If we do the cutout things, we'd need to have pictures of folk wearing tops with single letters on them then have them carefully positioned to spell out SPFL - CORRUPT, DONCASTER SOOKS LIEWELL'S BOABY etc

[Theme From Sparta F.C.]

9 minutes ago, Boof said:

If we do the cutout things, we'd need to have pictures of folk wearing tops with single letters on them then have them carefully positioned to spell out SPFL - CORRUPT, DONCASTER SOOKS LIEWELL'S BOABY etc

I nearly choked on my Cuppa reading that. Superb!!! 😆

[drumie jambo]

1 hour ago, Boof said:

If we do the cutout things, we'd need to have pictures of folk wearing tops with single letters on them then have them carefully positioned to spell out SPFL - CORRUPT, DONCASTER SOOKS LIEWELL'S BOABY etc

😂😂😂Brilliant

[wattie exploited]

3 hours ago, Gershwin said:

Can we round up some of our angriest fans, book a soundbooth and record a rousing rendition of 'Neil Doncaster, yer a ______ ' to be played on loop at Tynecastle this season, plz?

can I be in your angriest fan round up as I like a good rant at all the haters ,especially  the Hibs ,Dundee ,St Mirren,Dundee utd ,Celtic ,Ranger, Ross County     and the SFA  

 

[Paolo]

1 hour ago, Boof said:

If we do the cutout things, we'd need to have pictures of folk wearing tops with single letters on them then have them carefully positioned to spell out SPFL - CORRUPT, DONCASTER SOOKS LIEWELL'S BOABY etc

Maybe get cut outs of Richard Prior, and we can make up that photo that appears on here sometimes.  

[Harry Potter]

4 hours ago, Ex member of the SaS said:

Hopefully they don't go down the route of cardboard cut outs with fans paying £25 to get their mugs on them. As you say the attempts so far have been cringe worthy. Kangaroo's FFS! Personally I would cover the seats with huge banners saying ONLY Hearts and take your medicine.

kangaroos 

[Boof]

Either a whole stand of Mr Oblivious or the emojis who make up the funnier (just) of the Lennon pics.

[HMFC01]

See if we can sneak a few faces in with these  

 

I prefer listening to the players yelling than hearing canned cheering.  There was options for it during the EPL to have either canned or none.  Hopefully we get same choice when Hearts games come around.

[skinnybob72]

Coconut shys behinds the goals. 
 

Each seat has a coconut with a Neil Doncaster face mask on it. At least if we don’t hit the target we might hit some Neil Doncasters. 
 

It could be a new ‘in play’ bet. Next player to hit a Neil Doncaster. 

[Shanks said no]

Cardboard cut out of Doncaster with a bullet hole in his forehead

 

I would pay £25 for that

[HMFCHammy]

12 hours ago, been here before said:

With a bit more planning we could have had some fun with the ER ones.

you do realise that would be handing money to them? 
a laugh yes but giving even a penny to them NO

[Weakened Offender]

I'll pay 25 bucks for a cardboard cutout of Ulrika Johnsson to sit in the lower Wheatfield. 👍

[ƒιѕнρℓαρѕ]

5 hours ago, Weakened Offender said:

I'll pay 25 bucks for a cardboard cutout of Ulrika Johnsson to sit in the lower Wheatfield. 👍

I'm pretty sure 25 bucks would get you the real Ulrika

[been here before]

1 hour ago, Smithee said:

I'm pretty sure 25 bucks would get you the real Ulrika

 

Hmmmmm...

 

Edited August 3, 2020 by been here before

[Fitzroy Pointon]

15 hours ago, Boof said:

Either a whole stand of Mr Oblivious or the emojis who make up the funnier (just) of the Lennon pics.

 

That would be genuinely hilarious