topcat Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Frustrated by the fog of uncertainty hanging over the managerial situation I checked the Official club website to see if there were any announcements, denials of rumours or even a loaded "No Comment" Instead I was faced with storry about the Stunning new Training kit that has now become available. http://www.heartsfc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/HeartsNewsDetail/0,,10289~1326087,00.html Stunning? Stunning? Call that bloody Stunning? A nice smart sports top with a Hearts badge and an Umbro logo, that's not even surprising never mind stunning. And the color scheme... White with Maroon that's unlikely to gast anybody's flabber! Maroon and white tie dye effect training kit would have been stunning! Jaguar print shoulder panels would have been stunning! An LSD inspired Psychadelic print reminicent of the cover of Cream's seminal album "Disreali gears" (or one of Henry Smiths 80's goalie tops) would have been stunning! Bright Pink would have been outrageously stunning although almost as unpalletable as green. The only even vaguely noteworthy thing is that dark Blue seems to have been well and truly adopted as our extra colour but even that is less than surprising. Hearts must have known that these kits weren't going to stun anybody and yet they insist on saying they will. Vlad has deliberately lied to the fans once more and don't get me started on those bloddy Gnomes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JamboRobbo Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Stop moaning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gigolo-Aunt Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 SACK THE BOARD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denny Crane Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Frustrated by the fog of uncertainty hanging over the managerial situation I checked the Official club website to see if there were any announcements, denials of rumours or even a loaded "No Comment" Instead I was faced with storry about the Stunning new Training kit that has now become available. http://www.heartsfc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/HeartsNewsDetail/0,,10289~1326087,00.html Stunning? Stunning? Call that bloody Stunning? A nice smart sports top with a Hearts badge and an Umbro logo, that's not even surprising never mind stunning. And the color scheme... White with Maroon that's unlikely to gast anybody's flabber! Maroon and white tie dye effect training kit would have been stunning! Jaguar print shoulder panels would have been stunning! An LSD inspired Psychadelic print reminicent of the cover of Cream's seminal album "Disreali gears" (or one of Henry Smiths 80's goalie tops) would have been stunning! Bright Pink would have been outrageously stunning although almost as unpalletable as green. The only even vaguely noteworthy thing is that dark Blue seems to have been well and truly adopted as our extra colour but even that is less than surprising. Hearts must have known that these kits weren't going to stun anybody and yet they insist on saying they will. Vlad has deliberately lied to the fans once more and don't get me started on those bloddy Gnomes. I've a spare pitchfork available TC. Are you with me brother...... (Watch oot Franken-Vlad) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cut The Crap Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Alas, our marketing "department" is hard-working, but lacks inspiration and sophistication. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geddy Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Admit it TC.....you are just gutted their training gear wasn't Rush baseball shirts aren't you? Now THAT would have been amazing!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan_R Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Its opinion, it can't be lies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcat Posted June 11, 2008 Author Share Posted June 11, 2008 I've a spare pitchfork available TC. Are you with me brother...... (Watch oot Franken-Vlad) Yes indeed What's the point of recruiting a new manager if we're only going to dress him up in a big blue comfy coat that looks like the ones everybody else has. Along with most posters I know little about this Icelander who's apparently in the frame for the job but I do know that I don't want him in the Hearts dug out unless he's wearing a the skin of a seal as a cape with the Umbro Logo stencilled on in its own blood and toting a Maroon helmet with Horns on it. While if Terry Butcher's coming he should take to wearing a big Maroon Top Hat with a white band. Obviously the colour scheme should be reversed for away fixtures. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcat Posted June 11, 2008 Author Share Posted June 11, 2008 Its opinion, it can't be lies. I was wondering how long it would take for some Vladgump apologist to come out of the woodwork and try and put a positive spin on things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PTBCAL Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Frustrated by the fog of uncertainty hanging over the managerial situation I checked the Official club website to see if there were any announcements, denials of rumours or even a loaded "No Comment" Instead I was faced with storry about the Stunning new Training kit that has now become available. http://www.heartsfc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/HeartsNewsDetail/0,,10289~1326087,00.html Stunning? Stunning? Call that bloody Stunning? A nice smart sports top with a Hearts badge and an Umbro logo, that's not even surprising never mind stunning. And the color scheme... White with Maroon that's unlikely to gast anybody's flabber! Maroon and white tie dye effect training kit would have been stunning! Jaguar print shoulder panels would have been stunning! An LSD inspired Psychadelic print reminicent of the cover of Cream's seminal album "Disreali gears" (or one of Henry Smiths 80's goalie tops) would have been stunning! Bright Pink would have been outrageously stunning although almost as unpalletable as green. The only even vaguely noteworthy thing is that dark Blue seems to have been well and truly adopted as our extra colour but even that is less than surprising. Hearts must have known that these kits weren't going to stun anybody and yet they insist on saying they will. Vlad has deliberately lied to the fans once more and don't get me started on those bloddy Gnomes. Having checked most of the stuff out - I admit I do a like a few of the training gear items. It will look good when Im glancing past the hobo's at the Corn Exchange. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denny Crane Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Yes indeed What's the point of recruiting a new manager if we're only going to dress him up in a big blue comfy coat that looks like the ones everybody else has. Along with most posters I know little about this Icelander who's apparently in the frame for the job but I do know that I don't want him in the Hearts dug out unless he's wearing a the skin of a seal as a cape with the Umbro Logo stencilled on in its own blood and toting a Maroon helmet with Horns on it. While if Terry Butcher's coming he should take to wearing a big Maroon Top Hat with a white band. Obviously the colour scheme should be reversed for away fixtures. I don't some folk here would be too keen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chad Sexington Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 I was wondering how long it would take for some Vladgump apologist to come out of the woodwork and try and put a positive spin on things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
N User Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 I quite like it. In fact i'd describe it as "stunning". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jam Tarts 1874 Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Frustrated by the fog of uncertainty hanging over the managerial situation I checked the Official club website to see if there were any announcements, denials of rumours or even a loaded "No Comment" Instead I was faced with storry about the Stunning new Training kit that has now become available. http://www.heartsfc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/HeartsNewsDetail/0,,10289~1326087,00.html Stunning? Stunning? Call that bloody Stunning? A nice smart sports top with a Hearts badge and an Umbro logo, that's not even surprising never mind stunning. And the color scheme... White with Maroon that's unlikely to gast anybody's flabber! Maroon and white tie dye effect training kit would have been stunning! Jaguar print shoulder panels would have been stunning! An LSD inspired Psychadelic print reminicent of the cover of Cream's seminal album "Disreali gears" (or one of Henry Smiths 80's goalie tops) would have been stunning! Bright Pink would have been outrageously stunning although almost as unpalletable as green. The only even vaguely noteworthy thing is that dark Blue seems to have been well and truly adopted as our extra colour but even that is less than surprising. Hearts must have known that these kits weren't going to stun anybody and yet they insist on saying they will. Vlad has deliberately lied to the fans once more and don't get me started on those bloddy Gnomes. So you reckon Romanov wrote the marketing blurb for the training kit? So you are getting your knickers in a twist because Hearts are trying to sell some sporting merchandise? You need help Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigaro Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 I like the normal Tshirt one. The polo shirts not too bad either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chad Sexington Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 So you reckon Romanov wrote the marketing blurb for the training kit? So you are getting your knickers in a twist because Hearts are trying to sell some sporting merchandise? You need help Sigh. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irony Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denny Crane Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 So you reckon Romanov wrote the marketing blurb for the training kit? So you are getting your knickers in a twist because Hearts are trying to sell some sporting merchandise? You need help I suspect TC was taking the preverbial with his post. Re-read while holding a pinch of salt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcat Posted June 11, 2008 Author Share Posted June 11, 2008 So you reckon Romanov wrote the marketing blurb for the training kit? So you are getting your knickers in a twist because Hearts are trying to sell some sporting merchandise? You need help Another Vladtrumpet Well obviously he didn't actually write that Marketing blurb as it's in English so it's presumably translated from the Russian. But translated by a translator Handpicked by Vlad and then put on the website by marketing people who ultimately work for Vlad. The buck, as always, stops with Vlad and I'm sick of his lies. I do quite like the polo shirts though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alwaysthereinspirit Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 That Polo shirt will look good on me on the first tee. I like it. Not sure about the 3/4 lengh flood pants but each to their own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan_R Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 I was wondering how long it would take for some Vladgump apologist to come out of the woodwork and try and put a positive spin on things. *yawn* As a stand alone statement its fact. Something which an opinion can't be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redm Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Old Tolbooth Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 The winter jaiket is minging! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickmaroon Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 The winter jaiket is minging! Is that not the manager's jaiket .... christ on a stick is HE our new manager? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeramiah Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 'Lies' is a bit dramatic. Marketing is what it's known as. The marketing people are tasked with 'selling', regarless of whether the product is pish. People on this site are always saying that Robbie Neilson is great, and he's clearly a donkey, but as fans we promote out team.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portobellojambo1 Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 So, is Laryea Kingston wearing shorts that are too big, or has he put something in the tumble dryer that he shouldn't have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rudolf's Mate Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Smart but certainly not stunning! Now if they'd put some dolly bird in it with a big...... Smile then maybe it would have been stunning Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Old Tolbooth Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Is that not the manager's jaiket .... christ on a stick is HE our new manager? We could certainly do worse! In fact, we already have! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toxteth O'Grady Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Still no word about getting a decent pie supplier though:sad: ALL WE ARE SAYING IS GIVE US BAINS PIES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickmaroon Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 We could certainly do worse! In fact, we already have! Tony Ford? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcat Posted June 11, 2008 Author Share Posted June 11, 2008 Sigh. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irony Surely you mean http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/REALISM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chad Sexington Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Surely you mean http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/REALISM Ah. I stand corrected sir. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seymour M Hersh Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Another Vladtrumpet Well obviously he didn't actually write that Marketing blurb as it's in English so it's presumably translated from the Russian. But translated by a translator Handpicked by Vlad and then put on the website by marketing people who ultimately work for Vlad. The buck, as always, stops with Vlad and I'm sick of his lies. I do quite like the polo shirts though. I wonder if he sent himself a fax demanding to play his favourite words in the blurb? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seymour M Hersh Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Still no word about getting a decent pie supplier though:sad: ALL WE ARE SAYING IS GIVE US BAINS PIES They are hobos at Bains!:107years: But awesome pies. (Apologies TC if you think that over the top marketing). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CornhillHearts Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 I wonder if he sent himself a fax demanding to play his favourite words in the blurb? Got to say I hate the whole "bring it on" thing. is that what the happening kids are saying these days? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frankenstein Jambo. Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Another Vladtrumpet Well obviously he didn't actually write that Marketing blurb as it's in English so it's presumably translated from the Russian. But translated by a translator Handpicked by Vlad and then put on the website by marketing people who ultimately work for Vlad. The buck, as always, stops with Vlad and I'm sick of his lies. I do quite like the polo shirts though. Do yourself a favour mate, hooswah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovecraft Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Finally, some decent 3/4 length training bottoms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ernie winchester Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 Yes indeed What's the point of recruiting a new manager if we're only going to dress him up in a big blue comfy coat that looks like the ones everybody else has. Along with most posters I know little about this Icelander who's apparently in the frame for the job but I do know that I don't want him in the Hearts dug out unless he's wearing a the skin of a seal as a cape with the Umbro Logo stencilled on in its own blood and toting a Maroon helmet with Horns on it. While if Terry Butcher's coming he should take to wearing a big Maroon Top Hat with a white band. Obviously the colour scheme should be reversed for away fixtures. PMSL... trying to picture this. Good one TC! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Future's Maroon Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 Is it maybe possible the club are not making any official comments due to the way the McGhee thing went? Granted, these stories have came out yesterday and with three new names in the hat....but someone mentioned on another thread (I think it was Porty Jambo) these may just be a smokescreen to attract the attention for a real candidate?! p.s I like the polo shirts too!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The People's Chimp Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 I'm regularly astounded by the manner in which some posts go flying miles over some people's heads. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john brownlee Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 I think I'll jump out the woodwork as well and be positive, very smart set of kit I do feel the marketing dept at Hearts are very good, quick with their publications and keep the fans well informed of the new products Well done Hearts keep up the good work Like your cartoon character you cant see much from inside a trash can he calls home Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marshallschunkychicken Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 Am I the only one who can spot the subplot in all this! Larry Kingston. Andrew Driver. Christophe Berra. It's obvious that Vlad is using the training kit launch as a cynical plot to put all our best talent in the shop window. Shaking with rage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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