Das Root Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 You can jump on my monkey anytime baby. And you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
William H. Bonney Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 I didn't put anything in your drink, i swear! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Das Root Posted March 23, 2012 Author Share Posted March 23, 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johanes de Silentio Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Don't go changin'! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dinger Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 You don't sweat much for a fat chick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigAlim Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 i say "what an arsehole eh?" when people talk about someone i don't know Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamboinglasgow Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Would you like to see what happens when a clam swallows a sausage? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig_ Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 'It really doesn't hurt that much, honestly" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Old Tolbooth Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Fancy gaun halfers on a basturt? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smack Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 "We've all done it." Surprising how much trouble it can get you into in the wrong situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jb101 Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Geez a sniff o yer stench trench. Sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boomstick Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Just stick it in me, love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
All roads lead to Gorgie Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 I'll NOT be back. Seem to say it at 4.45 on a Saturday for some strange reason Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gadgey55 Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 When i've guffed oot the bog and someone takes umbrage to the aroma, I always say "Better an empty hoose than a dirty tennant!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floyd Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 I'll call you or send you a text. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weststand93 Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Calm the **** down Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vlad-Stupid Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Last one on's the da Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Budgie. Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 "Stop, I'm nearly there!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Old Tolbooth Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Please don't turn this rape into a murder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gadgey55 Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Please don't turn this rape into a murder Only you eh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John McClure Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Same old bramble, Always brambling Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bighusref Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Would you like a sweetie? X Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Currahee! Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Bite down hard I'm coming in dry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Das Root Posted March 24, 2012 Author Share Posted March 24, 2012 Please don't turn this rape into a murder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Budgie. Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Bite down hard I'm coming in dry. Just about choked on my tea there! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GD_JAMBO Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 im sorry thats never happened to me before Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Just Came To Say Kello Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Nah can't I'm driving eh? Even to stupid stuff that doesn't involve being offered a drink. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvin Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 "I'm fine!" Even when I'm pissed off Its what I say when someone knows that something is bothering me and they ask if I am ok. So I always tell them that everything's fine. also that's what I am having on my epitaph Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floyd Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 "I'm fine!" Even when I'm pissed off also that's what I am having on my epitaph Prefer Spike Milligan's for his tombstone "Told you I was ill!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hughesie27 Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 On a Greig. (When you go over 3 months with no sex) Based on a mate you just couldn't get his hole no matter how hard he tried! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvin Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Prefer Spike Milligan's for his tombstone "Told you I was ill!!" Thats a classic I used to piss off ex's with the line "I'm fine" when at the time they knew it's a lie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superjack Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Well I enjoyed it And my other often used catchphrase Yes , it IS in Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvin Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 In work it common to hear me say "Stupid computer" when things aren't going well during the day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hansel Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 "You're a cure for happiness!" - to the wife when she's grumpy "Just one more game" - playing the Xbox "it's the way you say it" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bert Le Clos Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 It's good, but it's not the one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peter_hmfc Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 It's good, but it's not the one. This place needs a Roy Walker "RIIIIIGHT !!!" smiley. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daisy Doodle Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Ya lie!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notorious BIG Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 "Show me what you pish wae" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floyd Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 In work it common to hear me say "Stupid computer" when things aren't going well during the day Most overused words in my office come from the fat lesbian bint that sits the other side of the office from me but still has a voice like a foghorn!! She honestly can't complete a sentence without saying "absolutely" at least twice and then throwing in a "so it is" at the end of the sentence!! I was once unfortunate enough to be in a meeting with her and ended up playing "absolutely" & "so it is" bingo for an hour. 15 "absolutely's" and 6 "so it is's" had me physically restraining myself from stabbing her in the eye with my pen!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desmondo Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 Working in London we as in 3 of us (pals 1987)noticed the amount of people that said '' That's Right '' sometime twice in succession like '' That's Right '' '''That's Right '' It became unacceptable between us and even to this day none of us would dare say it in fear of ridicule What we done after it was said by anyone was to whistle rapid twice in tune to it , still do it I was at an interview and the guy in charge done it 3 times and I whistled, after a pregnant pause he told me the interview was finished, no job Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Theres a really annoying English driver in my work and every 2 minutes he says 'the thing is' in his stupid english accent......absolute **** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Les Izemore Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Bend over, I'll drive. or Can you smell fish? No? It must be your sloory giblets then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Great Khali Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Can I smell your feet? No you certainly cannot! Aw must be your beef curtains then... Cue slap in the chops. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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