Captain Sausage Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 Hi all, Looking for others experiences with kids and how they’ve handled things. Our boy is in P1 and has always struggled to follow directions and do life admin. He is always leaving his books in school, forgetting where he left toys and is almost completely incapable of self play. He switched school recently and we got a pretty scathing email from his teacher about his behaviour (basically just doesn’t pay attention and then distracts other kids). He ticks just about every inattentive ADHD symptom, so I think we are going to go and get him diagnosed privately. Has anyone else done this? It seems there are two treatments; Behavioural therapy and medication It feels like medication is a bit of a taboo, but we are leaning towards this route as he’s clearly a bright boy who just struggles to concentrate and if a pill can improve that, it seems like we are doing him a disservice by not looking into it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swanny17 Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 Simple answer is take the experts advice. Oh, and a complaint to the Education authorities about the teacher - they should be trained to recognise kids with these traits and offer support not criticism! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pap Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 I'm not sure if there is medication at the moment. Theres been a global shortage for a while now. I know the NHS have not been doing any diagnosis on people for a good while because of that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
been here before Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 (edited) 22 minutes ago, Captain Sausage said: Hi all, Looking for others experiences with kids and how they’ve handled things. Our boy is in P1 and has always struggled to follow directions and do life admin. He is always leaving his books in school, forgetting where he left toys and is almost completely incapable of self play. He switched school recently and we got a pretty scathing email from his teacher about his behaviour (basically just doesn’t pay attention and then distracts other kids). He ticks just about every inattentive ADHD symptom, so I think we are going to go and get him diagnosed privately. Has anyone else done this? It seems there are two treatments; Behavioural therapy and medication It feels like medication is a bit of a taboo, but we are leaning towards this route as he’s clearly a bright boy who just struggles to concentrate and if a pill can improve that, it seems like we are doing him a disservice by not looking into it. I know one or 2 folk in a similar, if not a bit worse situation. Long story short, after going through all sort of hoops and treatments it was meds that made the difference and a very significant one at that. Have the school mentioned anything about an educational psychologist? If not, then you bring it up with them. Also, if there are any PSAs then can they be involved in the class? Things like movement breaks, getting him to 'help' the teacher by collecting books or laying things out, quiet corners, that sort of thing can also help. The school should have protocols to follow and support to offer. Edited April 18 by been here before Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i wish jj was my dad Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 1 hour ago, Swanny17 said: Simple answer is take the experts advice. Oh, and a complaint to the Education authorities about the teacher - they should be trained to recognise kids with these traits and offer support not criticism! I'd echo the advice to talk to the experts and not listen to kiddie on practitioners on here. It's a huge step forward that these conditions are now recognised and people particularly kids can be supported. My wee yin was diagnosed early teens and once she understood what the issue was she was able to learn coping strategies that helped her cole. She is thriving now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Sausage Posted April 18 Author Share Posted April 18 Thanks for the experiences and advice guys - appreciate we're not alone and this isn't because we're shit parents and he's a bad boy. Will obviously follow doctor advice but the first step seems to be accepting that he's a little different and that he'll have this label to carry with him - but hopefully it'll mean he can get access to treatment that will make his (and our...) lives much better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gundermann Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 1 hour ago, Captain Sausage said: Hi all, Looking for others experiences with kids and how they’ve handled things. Our boy is in P1 and has always struggled to follow directions and do life admin. He is always leaving his books in school, forgetting where he left toys and is almost completely incapable of self play. He switched school recently and we got a pretty scathing email from his teacher about his behaviour (basically just doesn’t pay attention and then distracts other kids). He ticks just about every inattentive ADHD symptom, so I think we are going to go and get him diagnosed privately. Has anyone else done this? It seems there are two treatments; Behavioural therapy and medication It feels like medication is a bit of a taboo, but we are leaning towards this route as he’s clearly a bright boy who just struggles to concentrate and if a pill can improve that, it seems like we are doing him a disservice by not looking into it. How old is he? Most nations don't send 4 or 5 year olds to school which often creates such issues. Kids having play until age 6 or 7 usually sees any worries disappear. Some kids just need extra time to develop, boys especially. Diagnosis usually happens about those age. All the best to you, it's a real worry for parents. Medication seems to be the way but lots of play and exercise will Still benefit him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlimOzturk Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 Pretty certain my youngest has this as my wife has ADHD and noticed a lot of similarities.. We never went down the diagnosis route as we have managed his behavior well with the school and seem to have made good headway. Didn’t want him taking medication or being labelled unless absolutely necessary Biggest advice - diet low in sugar and plenty exercise. Plenty mental stimulation as well. Keep them away from phones/games consoles as much as possible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim_Duncan Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 22 minutes ago, AlimOzturk said: Pretty certain my youngest has this as my wife has ADHD and noticed a lot of similarities.. We never went down the diagnosis route as we have managed his behavior well with the school and seem to have made good headway. Didn’t want him taking medication or being labelled unless absolutely necessary Biggest advice - diet low in sugar and plenty exercise. Plenty mental stimulation as well. Keep them away from phones/games consoles as much as possible. Top advice. It’s a bit of a simplification and of course children need a lot more, but it’s not too much of a stretch to say that the majority of kids you see struggling with their behaviours tend to constantly be eating shite, drinking fizzy shite and watching shite (while their parent also watch shite). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Homme Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 As someone said previously, there is a global shortage of medication right now so immediate treatment may not be an option. But in the absence of this you should definitely get a diagnosis. Even a formal acknowledgement of his condition can be passed on to school and appropriate measures put in place. My partner works in Primary school with those who have additional needs such as ADHD and Autism etc. I'll show her this later and see if there is anything she can add. What I will say is that medication will make a difference. There is one pupil who Mrs Homme teaches who has been without it for weeks / months now (due to shortage) and the difference in them is night and day without it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudyJudyJudy Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 2 hours ago, Captain Sausage said: Hi all, Looking for others experiences with kids and how they’ve handled things. Our boy is in P1 and has always struggled to follow directions and do life admin. He is always leaving his books in school, forgetting where he left toys and is almost completely incapable of self play. He switched school recently and we got a pretty scathing email from his teacher about his behaviour (basically just doesn’t pay attention and then distracts other kids). He ticks just about every inattentive ADHD symptom, so I think we are going to go and get him diagnosed privately. Has anyone else done this? It seems there are two treatments; Behavioural therapy and medication It feels like medication is a bit of a taboo, but we are leaning towards this route as he’s clearly a bright boy who just struggles to concentrate and if a pill can improve that, it seems like we are doing him a disservice by not looking into it. Maybe he’s just takin time to settle into the school environment ? Was he just 4 and a half when he started out 5 plus as there can be a real developmental difference in those stages . Also please try and avoid any meds until other strategies have been discussed and looked at . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudyJudyJudy Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 2 hours ago, Captain Sausage said: and we got a pretty scathing email from his teacher about his behaviour (basically just doesn’t pay attention and then distracts other kids Btw that teacher sounds a beep beep Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudyJudyJudy Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 52 minutes ago, AlimOzturk said: Pretty certain my youngest has this as my wife has ADHD and noticed a lot of similarities.. We never went down the diagnosis route as we have managed his behavior well with the school and seem to have made good headway. Didn’t want him taking medication or being labelled unless absolutely necessary Biggest advice - diet low in sugar and plenty exercise. Plenty mental stimulation as well. Keep them away from phones/games consoles as much as possible. Excellent advice . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudyJudyJudy Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 2 hours ago, Captain Sausage said: Hi all, Looking for others experiences with kids and how they’ve handled things. Our boy is in P1 and has always struggled to follow directions and do life admin. He is always leaving his books in school, forgetting where he left toys and is almost completely incapable of self play. He switched school recently and we got a pretty scathing email from his teacher about his behaviour (basically just doesn’t pay attention and then distracts other kids). He ticks just about every inattentive ADHD symptom, so I think we are going to go and get him diagnosed privately. Has anyone else done this? It seems there are two treatments; Behavioural therapy and medication It feels like medication is a bit of a taboo, but we are leaning towards this route as he’s clearly a bright boy who just struggles to concentrate and if a pill can improve that, it seems like we are doing him a disservice by not looking into it. Actually I’d want a detailed account of what issues the teacher claims your child has ? Maybe she just can’t be arsed dealing with his so called difficult behaviours . Plus aren’t children allowed to have different personalities ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim_Duncan Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 43 minutes ago, JudyJudyJudy said: Actually I’d want a detailed account of what issues the teacher claims your child has ? Maybe she just can’t be arsed dealing with his so called difficult behaviours . Plus aren’t children allowed to have different personalities ? It's a tough one, though. Without knowing about this particular situation, but just an observation from my own kids saying that classmates who disrupt and distract tend to cause them difficulties in completing tasks and cause them, particularly when they were younger, stress and frustration. Schools are under pressure to support those who have SENs by integrating them into regular classroom routines, but this can have a detrimental impact on the learning of others and make classroom management very difficult. (There's also the issue of kids turning up in regular classes with no English skills - but that's probably for another thread) It boils down to class sizes, IMO. Large classes make it difficult, if not impossible for teachers to actually support each child, not just those who require extra support and attention. We could go the Chinese route of having classes of 50-60 kids and just labelling those who don't keep up as 'a problem' or 'stupid', but that's no good either. It's like we're trying to steer a bike without the handlebars. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackal Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 Speak to the school head. Teachers should be well equipped to notice these problems their students are having. They may not have the resources to deal with it so may try and fob you off. There are a few mainstream schools that deal with children with these problems and some are better than others. Go to your GP and ask for a referral to Camhs at the royal ed hospital. Getting correct schooling will be harder than getting a diagnosis. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
been here before Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 13 minutes ago, jackal said: Go to your GP and ask for a referral to Camhs at the royal ed hospital. The school can do that. The waiting lists are years long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
highlandjambo3 Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 5 hours ago, JudyJudyJudy said: Btw that teacher sounds a beep beep Not defending anyone here but, I think there is a lot more teachers need to be aware of these days than the old belt thrashing numpties of my Gracemount days back in the late 70’s. At the age of 5 my grandson was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes last year, he was in hospital for a week mainly to stabilise his condition and, to offer advice and training to my daughter. I went down to get involved in the hospital training as I’m often on my own with my grandkids…….never realised how much is involved and how advanced the technology is and, if you get an injection dosage wrong or mis read a reading it can be quite serious, even fatal. Anyway, getting back to the teacher thing, my grandsons school needed to be informed about his condition (of course) which they were and, to my surprise there were about half a dozen teachers trained to read and understand blood sugars and, to inject the required amount of insulin prior to the kids eating with each child having to be tested before lunch breaks, as well as before, during (every 30 minutes) and after physical exercise. They also needed to know emergency low/high reading protocol. A specialist nurse from the hospital spent the day with the teachers going over my grandsons specific needs and, carrying out some additional teacher training. Not sure if the teachers get paid extra for this but, I had no idea this was something they did. Massive respect to teachers for this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Homme Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 5 hours ago, been here before said: The school can do that. The waiting lists are years long. My daughters friend got his first contact with Camhs last week. 25 months later. I'd still get the referral but yeah just be aware of the waiting list as you say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamboy1982 Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 I got diagnosed with adhd at 40 and started meds soon after. They have helped massively with life and dealing with things. I wish it was diagnosed as a child but there’s nothing I can do about it now. both my kids have adhd and have been taking meds for a few years now. The difference in how they are doing at school is massive. Both are bright, intelligent kids but they had different issues due to their adhd. One was inattentive and the other was more of emotional issue. They are both now doing much better. The key is getting the diagnosis, reading up as much you can on things to put in place to help them and yourselves and finally meds if recommended by camhs. Once diagnosed speak to the school and ensure they put measures in place to aide and assist them at school and that the teachers are all made aware. it’s hard and your kid will likely have some tough times as our brains are just different. Neurodiverse people can have amazing lives once they understand how their brains work and how they see and understand things differently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
been here before Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 9 hours ago, been here before said: Long story short, after going through all sort of hoops and treatments it was meds that made the difference and a very significant one at that. 7 hours ago, Gundermann said: Medication seems to be the way but lots of play and exercise will Still benefit him. 7 hours ago, Homme said: What I will say is that medication will make a difference. There is one pupil who Mrs Homme teaches who has been without it for weeks / months now (due to shortage) and the difference in them is night and day without it. 31 minutes ago, jamboy1982 said: I got diagnosed with adhd at 40 and started meds soon after. They have helped massively with life and dealing with things. I wish it was diagnosed as a child but there’s nothing I can do about it now. both my kids have adhd and have been taking meds for a few years now. The difference in how they are doing at school is massive. So those folk with personal experience all say one thing about meds, where as the self appointed expert on all aspects of health says another... 7 hours ago, JudyJudyJudy said: Also please try and avoid any meds until other strategies have been discussed and looked at . He's an absolute danger on these threads. Opinion based on nothing more than google and an awareness course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaptainShanks Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 6 hours ago, been here before said: So those folk with personal experience all say one thing about meds, where as the self appointed expert on all aspects of health says another... He's an absolute danger on these threads. Opinion based on nothing more than google and an awareness course. What is your opinion then? Please enlighten us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudyJudyJudy Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 😂😂😂😂 “ danger”” ffs what a drama queen 🫅 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudyJudyJudy Posted April 18 Share Posted April 18 8 minutes ago, CaptainShanks said: What is your opinion then? Please enlighten us. He’s a very angry angry man . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
been here before Posted April 19 Share Posted April 19 6 hours ago, CaptainShanks said: What is your opinion then? Please enlighten us. Have a read of the thread, its there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fbjambo Posted April 19 Share Posted April 19 We were on the waiting list for camhs and just before Covid had our initial appointment - we were then offered an online assessment via Helios my son was 15 and was always a bit different from his peers and i had my suspicions he was on the spectrum. When they got a bit older, I could see it more - I thought to get a diagnosis would help him and people understand things that he does. We had a couple of comments from teachers about things and he had speech problems when he was younger. He can’t see he is any different and hasn’t told anyone he is on the spectrum Helios did the assessments - us as a family, him on his own and we also had follow up calls to talk through what it meant and how he felt etc I think they also do private assessments but may also have some useful information good luck - it is a journey and we love his uniqueness (although sometimes frustrating) https://healios.org.uk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CavySlaveJambo Posted April 22 Share Posted April 22 (edited) On 18/04/2024 at 06:52, Captain Sausage said: It feels like medication is a bit of a taboo, but we are leaning towards this route as he’s clearly a bright boy who just struggles to concentrate and if a pill can improve that, it seems like we are doing him a disservice by not looking into it. I was diagnosed ASD in 1999, and ADHD-PI (Inattentive as an adult). Meds made a massive difference. Not many places will start medication at the moment. Not until the shortage resolves. What I will say is even with ADHD-PI fidget breaks are good. Edited April 22 by CavySlaveJambo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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