Maroon Sailor Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 If anybody is interested http://www.theguardian.com/football/2015/aug/24/jermain-defoe-personal-assistant-sunderland-stocking-fridge The ad starts: ?We are looking for a highly experienced Executive Personal Assistant who will be working closely with senior manager of Defoe Enterprise Ltd. You will be working for a high profile individual within the sports industry so the candidate must therefore, by nature, be very flexible and hands-on and be capable [of] multitasking, most importantly you must maintain the highest level of confidentiality in order to assist the manager.? The successful candidate will be involved in ?scheduling and organising the manager?s and families? private, social and business calenders, arranging all public appearances, arranging and securing travel arrangements, working on selected business projects and maintaining daily itineraries?. They will ideally be able to ?create a global brand for the Jermain Defoe name, growing his online database on his website, Twitter, Facebook and other social networking platforms? as well as ?gaining further recognition within the media? and produce ?his own iPhone apps?. The assistant will also plan early events including family birthdays, organise family holidays and individual holidays, create an inventory for holiday villas, and ?manage and organise individual family members (Sandra, Andre, Chonte and Chase, family pets)?. They must help to plan and organising special yearly calendar events such as mother?s day, black history month, and Christmas, and be on call ?24/7? the whole year round. And here?s a taster from the ?errands? section: ? Organise all Jermain?s personal needs i.e. drycleaners, gardeners, house refurbishments, sourcing interior designers and everyday task etc. ? Regularly checking the home when Jermain is away, making sure all is in place for his return i.e. fridge is stocked and plants watered and house is clean. ? Select and organise wardrobe with specific designers for special events/appearances i.e. Oswald boateng, Harrods, ZAP etc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remnants of Standards Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Jermain is behind the curve with this one as Jonjo Shelvey was advertising for a chef at the same money last week. Football at the top level really is screwed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alyp Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Oh dear. Doesn't bathe him in glory does it. In fairness it was probably written by one of his team. Funnily enough my wife used to go to the same church as him when we lived in London and she said he always came across as very humble. Never met him myself as I would instantaneously combust if I ever entered a church. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 25, 2015 Author Share Posted August 25, 2015 Jermain is behind the curve with this one as Jonjo Shelvey was advertising for a chef at the same money last week. Football at the top level really is screwed. When Defoe says 24/7 - I think he means literally judging by that job description. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mcalford Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Surely this is a p*ss take? From creating Iphone apps to looking after the family dogs to making sure his fridge is stocked, this is probably the broadest job spec I have ever seen in my whole entire life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tams bird Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 32 he wont be on ?60,000 a week for that much longer. Water his own plants . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwindonJambo Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Basically a well paid skivvy, there to do everything for the whole family 365 24/7. Everything bar dressing them and wiping their backsides. Taking their tantrums whenever anything isn't quite to their satisfaction. What an unhealthy environment for his kids to grow up in. They'll be spoiled beyond belief. Defoe has just gone down about 100 notches in my opinion. What an arse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
We_are_the_Hearts Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 This can't be real..............no one would do that for ?60,000 a year, the only thing not there is wiping the wee tits backside! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 25, 2015 Author Share Posted August 25, 2015 This can't be real..............no one would do that for ?60,000 a year, the only thing not there is wiping the wee tits backside!No mention of cutting up his meat and spoon feeding him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan_R Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Surely this is a p*ss take? From creating Iphone apps to looking after the family dogs to making sure his fridge is stocked, this is probably the broadest job spec I have ever seen in my whole entire life.They'll obviously just be 'oraganising' and I'd imagine having a budget to cover it. Arrange a gardener for plants, organise IT guys to sort apps, get a marketing team for the social media, employ a maid for the house etc It's not like they'll personally be doing every one of these tasks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Son Of Anarchy Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Has to be a windup surely. Seen a documentary once where was talking about modern day slavery etc and he came across really well as apposed to bitter. That wage is a joke though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah O Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pingu Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 This smackdown is good: http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/do-i-want-to-be-jermain-defoes-pa-609 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dia Liom Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Millionaire looks to appoint PA. What else is there to this story? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mcalford Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 They'll obviously just be 'oraganising' and I'd imagine having a budget to cover it. Arrange a gardener for plants, organise IT guys to sort apps, get a marketing team for the social media, employ a maid for the house etc It's not like they'll personally be doing every one of these tasks. It is a broad job spec, that's what I am getting at, you would still have to be pretty switched on about all the above to make sure you get the best people in that can do the job to a high enough standard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CollyWolly Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 'To create a global brand for the name Jermain Defoe' Are you serious, no one will know who the feck he is 2 weeks after he hangs his boots up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 25, 2015 Author Share Posted August 25, 2015 Millionaire looks to appoint PA. What else is there to this story? He needs someone to tie his shoe laces if you want to apply Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toggie88 Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Millionaire looks to appoint PA. What else is there to this story? Agree. There'll be people doing that job for less high profile people for a lot less money. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lewis2006 Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 The orgazoid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dalstonjambo Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Agree. There'll be people doing that job for less high profile people for a lot less money. Exactly. But because it's a footballer there is hysteria. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southcap Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 So a very well paid au pair essentially?He should be congratulated for creating such a well paid job surely? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amsterjambo Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 So a very well paid au pair essentially? He should be congratulated for creating such a well paid job surely? Sure, lots of au pairs develop apps, global brands and fashion lines. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geoff Kilpatrick Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Sounds right up Karl from The Simpsons street! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The People's Chimp Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Millionaire looks to appoint PA. What else is there to this story? Indeed. With a part of the role being to look into other business ventures, as risibly open to lampooning as a fragrance or an app might be, there's not really a big deal in someone like that appointing a PA. The same for Shelvey, the guy has struggled with his diet, admits he's a poor cook and has thrown away opportunities in the past. Having realised this, and aware of how big a chance he has, he is investing in his future by appointing a chef. What's the big deal? Wealthy individual and athlete appoints chef in order to maximise playing and earning potential over his career. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southcap Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Sure, lots of au pairs develop apps, global brands and fashion lines. I think the part you are missing is 'potential projects' Barring the charity, they will become non-starters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amsterjambo Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 I think the part you are missing is 'potential projects' Barring the charity, they will become non-starters. All right then.. Of course these will turn out to be non-starters too, but this is what he wants one person to do. While cleaning his house, watering his kids and taking his plants to school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 27, 2015 Author Share Posted August 27, 2015 Millionaire footballer wants to employ someone to make him even more money. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boof Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Taking it to a nonsensical degree, but if he wants someone on call 24/7/365 then that's an hourly rate of ?6.85...before tax, NICs etc. Not for me, ta. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The People's Chimp Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Taking it to a nonsensical degree, but if he wants someone on call 24/7/365 then that's an hourly rate of ?6.85...before tax, NICs etc. Not for me, ta. So, you take it to a nonsensical degree, then on the basis of your nonsensical analysis, write it off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 27, 2015 Author Share Posted August 27, 2015 Taking it to a nonsensical degree, but if he wants someone on call 24/7/365 then that's an hourly rate of ?6.85...before tax, NICs etc. Not for me, ta. Exactly Hi - personal PA ? Yes Jermain Totally forgot it's my son's budgies birthday today, can you run out and get a card and some top of the range seed for it It's 3 o'clock in the morning Jermain And ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rousset1 Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 He likes to bite people so I'm out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bert Le Clos Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 When you bear in mind he earns that in a week, he's not really stretching his finances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CollyWolly Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 All right then.. Of course these will turn out to be non-starters too, but this is what he wants one person to do. While cleaning his house, watering his kids and taking his plants to school. My wife is an executive PA (not for anyone famous) She read the job spec and said 'Sounds like he needs his mum back in his life. First thing you would have to do would be slap him hard in the face and tell him to get real' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erik Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 On the face of it, ?60k a year is a hefty wage - my initial thought was, damn right i'd do that! However, I think you'd end up spending most of that in trying to fit in with his lifestyle and whatnot. I get the feeling he's not expecting his PA to be dressed in a suit from George kinda thing....... Then factor in the 24/7/365 part of thing and all of a sudden that dream salary perhaps isn't quite so appealing. Must be really hard being a pro footballer mind you....... I can fully appreciate the struggle........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boof Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 So, you take it to a nonsensical degree, then on the basis of your nonsensical analysis, write it off. Spot on. Well done, you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The People's Chimp Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Spot on. Well done, you. Bit touchy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ribble Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 On the face of it, ?60k a year is a hefty wage - my initial thought was, damn right i'd do that! However, I think you'd end up spending most of that in trying to fit in with his lifestyle and whatnot. I get the feeling he's not expecting his PA to be dressed in a suit from George kinda thing....... Then factor in the 24/7/365 part of thing and all of a sudden that dream salary perhaps isn't quite so appealing. Must be really hard being a pro footballer mind you....... I can fully appreciate the struggle........ I'd actually assume the opposite in that if he wanted you to be wearing a ?5k suit then it would go on expenses, likewise any travelling etc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jake Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Im applying then sub contract the job out to someone for 25 grand Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazzas right boot Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 If anybody is interested http://www.theguardian.com/football/2015/aug/24/jermain-defoe-personal-assistant-sunderland-stocking-fridge The ad starts: ?We are looking for a highly experienced Executive Personal Assistant who will be working closely with senior manager of Defoe Enterprise Ltd. You will be working for a high profile individual within the sports industry so the candidate must therefore, by nature, be very flexible and hands-on and be capable [of] multitasking, most importantly you must maintain the highest level of confidentiality in order to assist the manager.? The successful candidate will be involved in ?scheduling and organising the manager?s and families? private, social and business calenders, arranging all public appearances, arranging and securing travel arrangements, working on selected business projects and maintaining daily itineraries?. They will ideally be able to ?create a global brand for the Jermain Defoe name, growing his online database on his website, Twitter, Facebook and other social networking platforms? as well as ?gaining further recognition within the media? and produce ?his own iPhone apps?. The assistant will also plan early events including family birthdays, organise family holidays and individual holidays, create an inventory for holiday villas, and ?manage and organise individual family members (Sandra, Andre, Chonte and Chase, family pets)?. They must help to plan and organising special yearly calendar events such as mother?s day, black history month, and Christmas, and be on call ?24/7? the whole year round. And here?s a taster from the ?errands? section: ? Organise all Jermain?s personal needs i.e. drycleaners, gardeners, house refurbishments, sourcing interior designers and everyday task etc. ? Regularly checking the home when Jermain is away, making sure all is in place for his return i.e. fridge is stocked and plants watered and house is clean. ? Select and organise wardrobe with specific designers for special events/appearances i.e. Oswald boateng, Harrods, ZAP etc Save yourself ?60k son, get a wife, they even throw in extra's every month or so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 27, 2015 Author Share Posted August 27, 2015 https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lj2tIDXpKCk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peebo Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Millionaire looks to appoint PA. What else is there to this story? Exactly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roscogt1 Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 He can GTF with that. Reading it just got right on my tits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadianjambo Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Surely this is a p*ss take? From creating Iphone apps to looking after the family dogs to making sure his fridge is stocked, this is probably the broadest job spec I have ever seen in my whole entire life. Actually, kind of sounds like he is looking for a wife, but without the hassles!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erik Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I'd actually assume the opposite in that if he wanted you to be wearing a ?5k suit then it would go on expenses, likewise any travelling etc I did actually wonder that myself after I typed it to be honest so yeah, probably fair point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yoda Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 At least he's a living wage employer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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