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  • Glasgowben

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Ray Gin
Posted

By all accounts he seems to have been doing really well the last couple of seasons. I saw a highlights clip of him recently making some very decent saves.

 

Good to see he has turned his career around and learned how to use his hands, as he was easily the worst keeper we've had in my lifetime (if we ignore Kurskis's brief appearance).

 

 

 

Threedoorsdown
Posted

Shudder.

Jambo-Fox
Posted

UUURRRZZZZ fans love him …

Swanny17
Posted

Another Levein master class. 

Valois No1
Posted

Seriously the worst keeper I’ve ever seen play at Hearts. Fair play he seems to be doing decent enough. 

hughesie27
Posted

A roulette?

 

 

They mean a Maradonna turn.

Posted

Roulette? Watching the ***** makes me want to give the Russian version a go...

Posted
7 minutes ago, hughesie27 said:

A roulette?

 

 

They mean a Maradonna turn.


Zidane if you’re of a slightly younger vintage.

Sooperstar
Posted

Aye, delighted for him.

Masonic
Posted

 

Fraggle
Posted
3 minutes ago, Masonic said:

 

So we are just ignoring the terrible first touch, and how he chucked himself into the player as he pirouetted with all the grace of a drunken Frankenstein Monster. 

Jambo dans les Pyrenees
Posted

I am 50 years old.

 

Every time I go for an Indian, I snigger at the broken poppadoms and think of JP.

 

Man Utd keeper, my arse.

 

image.jpeg.19bfd6ac9c300bae073c8776c4c84c7b.jpeg

Kennyfragg13
Posted

Blows my mind this guy makes 260k a year 

 

Posted

A poor man’s Craig Nelson.

Gorgiewave
Posted

The best kicker of a ball of any Hearts goalkeeper I've seen. Anything else a disaster.

Posted

In terms of the worst goalkeepers I’ve seen playing for Hearts, he’s firmly in the top 1.

 

For overall worst Hearts players I’ve seen, definitely in the top 5. 

Barney bulge
Posted

 got us relegated 

Bongo 1874
Posted

Not a bad goalkeeper years of bad recruitment,Hearts needed a scapegoat he was it.

Gershwin
Posted
3 minutes ago, Bongo 1874 said:

Not a bad goalkeeper years of bad recruitment,Hearts needed a scapegoat he was it.

 

Hearts needed a goalkeeper. He wasn't it.

Bill Sikes
Posted (edited)

Still don't understand the obsession with this guy or any Goalkeeper tbh.

 

They always say you need a great goalkeeper to win leagues . . that rules us out for rather a long time.

 

Goalkeepers aren't really Footballers, the clue is in the name btw. 

 

Any footballer of any sort of ability from Pub to elite level will never blame a keeper for their own poor play. Last line of defense and all that.

 

Bizarre attack on a guy who's clearly not as bad as all the last pick players/goalkeepers on JKB who made a career out of not being a goalkeeper.

 

Just sayin 😃

Edited by Bill Sikes
Chairman of the Bored
Posted
6 hours ago, Barney bulge said:

 got us relegated 

We weren’t relegated. 

Robbo-Jambo
Posted

It was his poor first touch that led him to doing his fancy footwork.

Forrest
Posted
11 hours ago, Ray Gin said:

he was easily the worst keeper we've had in my lifetime (if we ignore Kurskis's brief appearance).

 

 

 

 

IMO, Kurskis was marginally better than him, but it's like being asked if you'd rather be kicked in the balls or punched in the face. 

Stupid Sexy Flanders
Posted
8 hours ago, Bill Sikes said:

Still don't understand the obsession with this guy or any Goalkeeper tbh.

 

They always say you need a great goalkeeper to win leagues . . that rules us out for rather a long time.

 

Goalkeepers aren't really Footballers, the clue is in the name btw. 

 

Any footballer of any sort of ability from Pub to elite level will never blame a keeper for their own poor play. Last line of defense and all that.

 

Bizarre attack on a guy who's clearly not as bad as all the last pick players/goalkeepers on JKB who made a career out of not being a goalkeeper.

 

Just sayin 😃

 

Not really sure what you mean. He was dreadful at being a goalkeeper, everything else is irrelevant. 

 

I felt sorry for the guy, I'm sure he was doing his best and he clearly felt terrible for all his mistakes, but he was awful. 

boag1874
Posted
8 hours ago, Bongo 1874 said:

Not a bad goalkeeper years of bad recruitment,Hearts needed a scapegoat he was it.

You are at it :rofl: he wasn’t a scapegoat he was a prime example of that bad recruitment.

 

He’s looking a better keeper now, fair play to him but when he was at us he conceded 37 goals from 81 shots on target, nearly 1 in 2 (and that includes literally any shot on target regardless of quality), his goals conceded per 90 was 1.85 & he kept 3 clean sheets in 20 games. Spin it however you want those are ****ing abysmal stats. Having good distribution is great but you still need your keeper to make saves first & foremost, it’s the most important part of the position.

 

Bonus points if you can find me a single good save in his time at hearts btw. Just one will do. Because I definitely can’t remember it happening.

Posted

That video is utter shite. 

 

His first touch FFS.

jambos are go!
Posted
13 hours ago, Gorgiewave said:

The best kicker of a ball of any Hearts goalkeeper I've seen. Anything else a disaster.

Agree 100%. Accurate and distant kicking.

Posted
12 hours ago, Bill Sikes said:

Still don't understand the obsession with this guy or any Goalkeeper tbh.

 

They always say you need a great goalkeeper to win leagues . . that rules us out for rather a long time.

 

Goalkeepers aren't really Footballers, the clue is in the name btw. 

 

Any footballer of any sort of ability from Pub to elite level will never blame a keeper for their own poor play. Last line of defense and all that.

 

Bizarre attack on a guy who's clearly not as bad as all the last pick players/goalkeepers on JKB who made a career out of not being a goalkeeper.

 

Just sayin 😃

“Goalkeepers aren’t really footballers”. You will need to give me another clue to explain that statement.

Bongo 1874
Posted
9 hours ago, boag1874 said:

You are at it :rofl: he wasn’t a scapegoat he was a prime example of that bad recruitment.

 

He’s looking a better keeper now, fair play to him but when he was at us he conceded 37 goals from 81 shots on target, nearly 1 in 2 (and that includes literally any shot on target regardless of quality), his goals conceded per 90 was 1.85 & he kept 3 clean sheets in 20 games. Spin it however you want those are ****ing abysmal stats. Having good distribution is great but you still need your keeper to make saves first & foremost, it’s the most important part of the position.

 

Bonus points if you can find me a single good save in his time at hearts btw. Just one will do. Because I definitely can’t remember it happening.

He was at us with players that simply were here to just pickup a wage.

 

The whole entire culture around the club was rotten.

Posted
1 hour ago, Bongo 1874 said:

He was at us with players that simply were here to just pickup a wage.

 

The whole entire culture around the club was rotten.


While I don’t disagree with the state the playing staff was in. This guy only made something like two saves from all the shots on target he faced. He was absolutely honking

jamboinglasgow
Posted

The poorest goalkeeper I have seen play for us (and I watched us play Kurskis, where Lee Wallace in goal provided a better keeper.) I dont think I remember one time he even saved the ball.

 

However, I think he demonstrates that a player can be awful at your club but doesn't mean they will never be good in their career. I think you can have players who are signed and you get people say that a fan of a club this played for 5 years ago says the player was the worst player ever to play for the club, then say that shows he will be terrible now. Judge them on now or most recent seasons.

Bongo 1874
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Rudy T said:


While I don’t disagree with the state the playing staff was in. This guy only made something like two saves from all the shots on target he faced. He was absolutely honking

Our team is far more fit than that team ever was,putting in the hard yards does not always mean you will win more,but in my time watching and playing football,a team that's fit and is prepared to work, is more difficult to play against than a team that is not prepared to run

 

 

 

 

Edited by Bongo 1874
Spellczech
Posted

Looked good on his debut for us. Rubbish from then on. Even a broken clock is correct twice a day etc

h-e-a-r-t-s
Posted

He was always good with the ball at his feet, it was his hands that were the problem 

Posted
On 28/03/2026 at 20:21, hughesie27 said:

A roulette?

 

 

They mean a Maradonna turn.

I always associate that with Zidane. I remember Stephen Pressley doing a very nice one at Easter Road running out of defence. 

boag1874
Posted
15 hours ago, Bongo 1874 said:

He was at us with players that simply were here to just pickup a wage.

 

The whole entire culture around the club was rotten.

What, was Joel here because he was a boyhood Hearts fan like? No, he was here because his parent club - Man Utd - sent him here on loan.

 

Yes there were some mercenaries at the club at that time but that team also had guys like Halkett, Smith, Irving, Hickey, Souttar, Walker, Naismith, Boyce & a handful of others who cared about Hearts & gave their all. You’re not telling me that because Glenn Whelan was in the team for a bit that it made him incapable of making straightforward saves? 
 

Face it Bongo, the guy was ****ing dreadful in his spell here, and was dreadful for other teams after leaving us too. Only in the past couple of seasons has he looked like anything close to a competent goalkeeper - which isn’t me knocking him, sometimes development takes time but it’s totally irrelevant to his time at Hearts.

boag1874
Posted
14 hours ago, jamboinglasgow said:

The poorest goalkeeper I have seen play for us (and I watched us play Kurskis, where Lee Wallace in goal provided a better keeper.) I dont think I remember one time he even saved the ball.

 

However, I think he demonstrates that a player can be awful at your club but doesn't mean they will never be good in their career. I think you can have players who are signed and you get people say that a fan of a club this played for 5 years ago says the player was the worst player ever to play for the club, then say that shows he will be terrible now. Judge them on now or most recent seasons.

Good post

Glasgowben
Posted

He didn't seem to have any ability to block a football, which one would think was kinda basic. 

 

Single handedly   (excuse the pun)  relegated us

Japan Jambo
Posted
On 28/03/2026 at 23:34, Bongo 1874 said:

Not a bad goalkeeper years of bad recruitment,Hearts needed a scapegoat he was it.

 

What an incredible take. He was beyond shit, judging by that clip he still hasn't learned much.

Chillidigits
Posted

AI at work . Not really him.

Shooter McGavin
Posted

Comfortably the worst keeper I have ever, and will ever, witness in my lifetime.

Serge Pizzorno
Posted

The worst Hearts player I have ever had the misfortune of watching in the worst Hearts side I have ever seen.

 

BigStein
Posted

I’ve never seen a keeper before or since that looked like he was actively jumping out the way of shots. The worst player in a terrible team

Ray Gin
Posted
On 28/03/2026 at 23:34, Bongo 1874 said:

Not a bad goalkeeper years of bad recruitment,Hearts needed a scapegoat he was it.

 

He had the worst save percentage of all the goalkeepers in the Scottish Premiership. By quite a distance too, IIRC. 

Posted

Seems nothing much has changed was always better with his feet. More sketchy goalkeeping 

Glasgowben
Posted
19 minutes ago, Ray Gin said:

 

He had the worst save percentage of all the goalkeepers in the Scottish Premiership. By quite a distance too, IIRC. 

He was worse than goal post.  At least that sometimes stopped things

Richard Dawkins
Posted
On 29/03/2026 at 14:49, Peebo said:

“Goalkeepers aren’t really footballers”. You will need to give me another clue to explain that statement.

Me too. That's a strange one.

 

I used to play in goals. So, am I now now not 'an ex footballer'? 

Penrices left boot
Posted

I remember he jumped out of the way of a shot v Killie, ball went right through him.

 

He was actually good at cross balls, in the games v Rangers he was commanding, just a shame he was like a broken Amiga 600- couldnae save a thing.

 

 

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