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The Mighty Thor

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1 hour ago, graygo said:

 

It's not a subject that often crops up in my daily life, just the same as anyone else's gender rarely crops up in my daily life. My main issue is when someone goes on about militant activists shouting down people who don't share their views and yet to me comes across as more of a militant activist than anyone I've ever spoke to about the subject. The person I'm talking about most certainly is transphobic.

Sorry I thought you had fostered or were fostering a child affected .

Was more worried I came across as patronising.

 

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3 hours ago, Led Tasso said:

Right, I'm here. If someone wants to argue with me about something I said on the Tory thread or some such, feel free to quote it here and have at it.

That might be me.

One of the things you were saying was that by questioning the right to safe space sharing with women (cis) as you describe put me in the category of contributing to teen deaths.

I watched a trans activist and either a senator or congressman at some kind of discussion about this subject.

She asked him if he thought a transman could get pregnant.

He replied no.

That led her to call him transphobic.

Do you believe a transman can get pregnant?

And also do you think that safe spaces for feminists or sexual assault survivors have legitimate reason not to include transmen?

And am I really contributing to trans teens harming themselves when I question an adult transmans accessibility to these places?

 

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1 hour ago, Ked said:

Sorry I thought you had fostered or were fostering a child affected .

Was more worried I came across as patronising.

 

 

I do mate. Apparently they don't exist though so who knows?

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3 hours ago, graygo said:

 

I do mate. Apparently they don't exist though so who knows?

For me it's not that anyone doesn't exist .There's so much that's different about us all but there's more that makes us the same.

I guess for me I'm always looking out for women because I grew up around them mostly.

My grandfather kept me sane😄

There is no doubt that sexuality and what it means has been constructed to an extent.

That's what bothers me about recent events.That there's dogma both ways and no room for breathing .And I worry that teens thoughts are being constructed .

It's like no one can just let things happen .On the one hand you have people who just say a man's a man on the other you have people administering life changing drugs to teens.

Or polarised views that see factions at pride marches.

I know people are pissec of at Judy.

He's a banger like most of us but he can be argued with.

So I suppose I'm saying as nipped as you get about this always speak your mind .

Your dealing with it .

 

 

 

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10 hours ago, Lone Striker said:

tbf to James, his pet subject was actually the main topic on Newsnight last night, with 2 MPs (one supporting Mordaunt & one supporting one of the others) trying to explain their positions on all this stuff.   

 

Penises, toilets  and surgery were mentioned .....     apparently its more important than a war, record food bank use, record NHS waiting times, and rampant inflation,   Each to their own, though.

.  :tlj:

Well mate there's always some dingle dropping bombs and food banks could be described as irrelevant when you consider the worlds poor or at least we can que for a visit.

I know what you're saying though.

 

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il Duce McTarkin
13 hours ago, Jeffros Furios said:

Certainly have and there's photos .

Unless I'm thinking something else 🤔 

 

Don't tempt me.

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1 hour ago, Lord BJ said:

My niece, has recently came out. She’s 23 and it has been met with mixed reaction. 

 

The mother in law reaction was ‘why can't she find a nice boy’. Though In fairness to her she has come to terms with it, I think it was more the disappointment of great great grandkids being less likely. 
 

The sister in law , nieces mother, has not taken it well at all. At first I assumed it was surprise and she would come to terms with it quickly. That’s has not been the case. They have barely spoken and she has refused to meet her girlfriend. She has pulled out of two parties where they would be, including one we’re hosting. Whilst the wife says she is complete denial over it. 
 

Her dad who isn’t with the sister in law, now, has been really supportive. 
 

I had said she was gay a couple of times to family members previously. It was always met with ‘no she’s not and don’t say that’. However, it was very obvious. 
 

Im actually glad that she’s met someone and seems to be in a real positive place. 
 

It is funny watching certain reactions. The wife who isn’t bothered by it has even uttered phrases like ‘she doesn’t dress like a lesbian’ and one stage was hoping she was bi and just a phase. 
 

I’ll be honest, I’ve been surprised and slightly dissapointed by certain family members reactions. I didn’t really think it was something in this day and age. Unfortunately, it appears I was wrong. 

This is something a just can't understand, how could a parent just stop meeting their kids because of something so trivial? We were out last night in Inverness with friends. 1 of the couples don't speak with their daughter because she married another woman. In every other way, they are perfectly reasonable people. They refused to go to their daughters wedding FFS. My other mate, her brother, was almost completely ostracised from the family because he went to the wedding with his mother. Even she, the granny, can't understand why her daughter is like that towards her own child.

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The Real Maroonblood

It’s really sad to see families divided by this.

Probably it’s quite common but doesn’t make it any easier.

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JudyJudyJudy

OK ok . I suppose i best respond in this thread. I actually thought long and hard about whether to or not as @The Mighty Thor is clearly trying to bait me  and or  rip the piss out of me.  I also was anxious about the inevitable " onslaught " so maybe he could have just called the thread   " lets have a go at James  for his trans issues "  Some have., some haven't .  As predicted I have been labelled transphobic. 

 

However there have actually been some interesting postings regarding LGB issues and discrimination which is happening right now , so maybe the thread might be an education for some. Here's hoping. So for whatever the intention of @The Mighty Thorfor starting the thread , it may be helpful and interesting for some. 

 

When i read @The Mighty Thor posting I was thinking he is conflating LGB issues with trans and I felt I am not getting involved in this cause this is one of the problems for LGB  today.  Our ideology and identities are under attack from the T part . We are getting lost in all the drama of trans issues.  As clearly noted by @Lord BJ and @superjackpostings there is still discrimination  and rejection for LGB people so there is still a lot of work to be done for LGB. 

 

I am a member of LGB Alliance ,  which was founded in 2019 in direct opposition the Stonewall LGBT policies on transgender issues .  which clearly states in mission statement and values as below.  Its a long read but I am completely in synch with their statements and values.  : If you want to debate any of it feel free to. I'm free 

 

 

 

Our Vision

Lesbians, gay men and bisexuals living free from discrimination or disadvantage based on their sexual orientation.

Our Mission

To advance lesbian, gay and bisexual rights

We advance the interests of lesbians, gay men and bisexuals, and stand up for our right to live as same-sex attracted people without discrimination or disadvantage.

We will ensure that the voices of lesbians, gay men and bisexuals are heard in all public and political discussions affecting our lives.

To highlight the dual discrimination faced by lesbians

We amplify the voices of lesbians and highlight the dual discrimination experienced by lesbians as women who are same-sex attracted in a male-dominated society.

To protect children who may grow up to be lesbian, gay, or bisexual

We work to protect children from harmful, unscientific ideologies that may lead them to believe either their personality or their body is in need of changing. Any child growing up to be lesbian, gay or bisexual has the right to be happy and confident about their sexuality and who they are.

To promote free speech on lesbian, gay and bisexual issues

We promote freedom of speech and informed dialogue on issues concerning the rights of lesbians, gay men and bisexuals. We assert that different opinions, even those we may disagree with, should be heard as part of the public debate.

Our Values

Respect
We engage with others respectfully. We discuss, propose, and oppose ideas; we do not attack individuals. Disagreement does not equal hate. We do not condone, endorse, or encourage any abusive or discriminatory behaviour towards any group or individual.

Solidarity
We work collaboratively, standing together, sharing information, and building connections with like-minded groups and individuals, curating community and resilience, to achieve positive outcomes.

Evidence
Facts matter. Our approach is to consider the evidence to make informed decisions and communicate in a factual and honest way. Legislation, policy, guidance and decisions that affect lesbians, gay men and bisexuals must also be based on evidence.

Clarity of meaning
We communicate ideas, and engage in debate, based on clear and accurate definitions. We uphold the legal and scientific definition of homosexuality as sexual orientation towards people of the same sex, and of bisexuality as sexual orientation towards people of either sex.

Reality of biology
We recognise that sex is binary, female and male, and that (for the vast majority of people) sex is determined at conception, observed at birth (or in utero), and recorded. We reject the co-opting of rare medical Differences in Sexual Development (DSDs/intersex conditions) in order to cast doubt on the binary nature of sex.

Individual freedom
We support women’s reproductive rights and bodily autonomy. We stand with lesbians in rejecting pressure to accept as sexual partners, or admit into lesbian spaces, males who define themselves as women. We stand with gay men in rejecting pressure to accept as sexual partners, or admit into gay men’s spaces, females who define themselves as men.

Non-partisan
We are non-party political. We engage with organisations and publications with diverse political views. However, we do not, and will not, forge links with, or accept funding from, any organisation that does not share our values or whose aims we consider to be fundamentally hostile to the rights of lesbians, gay men and bisexuals, or that seeks to undermine women’s reproductive rights.

We communicate ideas, and engage in debate, based on clear and accurate definitions. We uphold the legal and scientific definition of homosexuality as sexual orientation towards people of the same sex, and of bisexuality as sexual orientation towards people of either sex.

Reality of biology
We recognise that sex is binary, female and male, and that (for the vast majority of people) sex is determined at conception, observed at birth (or in utero), and recorded. We reject the co-opting of rare medical Differences in Sexual Development (DSDs/intersex conditions) in order to cast doubt on the binary nature of sex.

Individual freedom
We support women’s reproductive rights and bodily autonomy. We stand with lesbians in rejecting pressure to accept as sexual partners, or admit into lesbian spaces, males who define themselves as women. We stand with gay men in rejecting pressure to accept as sexual partners, or admit into gay men’s spaces, females who define themselves as men.

 

 

 

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JudyJudyJudy
3 hours ago, Lord BJ said:

My niece, has recently came out. She’s 23 and it has been met with mixed reaction. 

 

The mother in law reaction was ‘why can't she find a nice boy’. Though In fairness to her she has come to terms with it, I think it was more the disappointment of great great grandkids being less likely. 
 

The sister in law , nieces mother, has not taken it well at all. At first I assumed it was surprise and she would come to terms with it quickly. That’s has not been the case. They have barely spoken and she has refused to meet her girlfriend. She has pulled out of two parties where they would be, including one we’re hosting. Whilst the wife says she is complete denial over it. 
 

Her dad who isn’t with the sister in law, now, has been really supportive. 
 

I had said she was gay a couple of times to family members previously. It was always met with ‘no she’s not and don’t say that’. However, it was very obvious. 
 

Im actually glad that she’s met someone and seems to be in a real positive place. 
 

It is funny watching certain reactions. The wife who isn’t bothered by it has even uttered phrases like ‘she doesn’t dress like a lesbian’ and one stage was hoping she was bi and just a phase. 
 

I’ll be honest, I’ve been surprised and slightly dissapointed by certain family members reactions. I didn’t really think it was something in this day and age. Unfortunately, it appears I was wrong. 

 

1 hour ago, superjack said:

This is something a just can't understand, how could a parent just stop meeting their kids because of something so trivial? We were out last night in Inverness with friends. 1 of the couples don't speak with their daughter because she married another woman. In every other way, they are perfectly reasonable people. They refused to go to their daughters wedding FFS. My other mate, her brother, was almost completely ostracised from the family because he went to the wedding with his mother. Even she, the granny, can't understand why her daughter is like that towards her own child.

 

1 hour ago, Lord BJ said:


I really don’t get it. How, you would not want to be supportive to your kids is beyond me. **** even a simple things like a hug and saying it changes nothing.

 

The sister in law, is a arseholes by most metrics tbf. However, this is certainly been a bit of an eye opener. 
 

The problem is she will loose her relationship with her daughter and probably others in family. That would be tragic irrespective of how much a idiot I think the sister in law is. 
 

Nowt as queer as folk (pun intended)

Thank you for sharing this @Lord BJ as it dispels the myth that LGB people are now free from disclination and rejection from loved ones.  Legally LGB have came a long way but societal acceptance is still an issue. I am pleased you are supporting your niece .  Nothing more heart breaking that to face family rejection for just being who you are. I honestly struggle with this issue. Surely any parent just wants their child to be happy and content with who they are ? However i note that you said your sister in law is an " arsehole  " so that didn't surprise you. You often find with homophobes they are also hate or have little tolerance for other groups so can be racist. misogynist etc too. 

 

And another sad tale from @superjack

 

 

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My son has a couple of openly gay mates at school, two girls and a lad, there's a few openly gay pupils at his school in every year which is really encouraging, I just hope that acceptance continues.

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JudyJudyJudy
11 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said:

My son has a couple of openly gay mates at school, two girls and a lad, there's a few openly gay pupils at his school in every year which is really encouraging, I just hope that acceptance continues.

Yes this is really positive now.  The teenage years for gay and lesbian teenagers are very hard really.  Its hard for most teenagers irrespective of their orientation but more difficult for LGB due to the obvious issues. Its a rites of passage time with " first kisses" boy friends " " girl friends" Leaving dance partner etc which bypass most gay teenagers. I had a miserable adolescence . I really did. I hated it. Very lonely and isolating. I'm not trying to make me as " poor me" . Its just what it was. I knew I was gay but couldn't speak to anyone about it or knew anyone who was . I couldn't wait to be an adult. 

 

I remember i went to a school reunion and someone was talking about  " going to the commie and Brattisanis for chips after with the gang " and did i enjoy it? . I said no. I wasn't invited. It was quite a painful memory actually.  However I did have friends .  Mostly female friends.   One is particular became a great friend and was supportive to me. She sadly died a few years back of alcoholism. 

 

 

 

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JudyJudyJudy

So before @The Mighty Thorgoes off on one at me.  Thanks actually. I'm coming around to this thread and the reasons behind it. Ill even send you my favourite gif 

 

PS what's not to like about this thread? . I have free reign to ramble on and on and on..( within the rules of course) 

image-23-10-21-06-58-14.gif

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5 minutes ago, JudyJudyJudy said:

Yes this is really positive now.  The teenage years for gay and lesbian teenagers are very hard really.  Its hard for most teenagers irrespective of their orientation but more difficult for LGB due to the obvious issues. Its a rites of passage time with " first kisses" boy friends " " girl friends" Leaving dance partner etc which bypass most gay teenagers. I had a miserable adolescence . I really did. I hated it. Very lonely and isolating. I'm not trying to make me as " poor me" . Its just what it was. I knew I was gay but couldn't speak to anyone about it or knew anyone who was . I couldn't wait to be an adult. 

 

 

 

I can only pretend to understand what you went through but I can remember Lasswade High School in the early 80's and I can't imaging any gay boy or girl having an easy time of, but a girl taking a girl as a their date to the leaving dance is common now, at my sons school at least and this is genuinely heartening to see, I'm delighted my son has the open and accepting attitude he, and his mates have.

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jack D and coke
3 hours ago, Lord BJ said:

My niece, has recently came out. She’s 23 and it has been met with mixed reaction. 

 

The mother in law reaction was ‘why can't she find a nice boy’. Though In fairness to her she has come to terms with it, I think it was more the disappointment of great great grandkids being less likely. 
 

The sister in law , nieces mother, has not taken it well at all. At first I assumed it was surprise and she would come to terms with it quickly. That’s has not been the case. They have barely spoken and she has refused to meet her girlfriend. She has pulled out of two parties where they would be, including one we’re hosting. Whilst the wife says she is complete denial over it. 
 

Her dad who isn’t with the sister in law, now, has been really supportive. 
 

I had said she was gay a couple of times to family members previously. It was always met with ‘no she’s not and don’t say that’. However, it was very obvious. 
 

Im actually glad that she’s met someone and seems to be in a real positive place. 
 

It is funny watching certain reactions. The wife who isn’t bothered by it has even uttered phrases like ‘she doesn’t dress like a lesbian’ and one stage was hoping she was bi and just a phase. 
 

I’ll be honest, I’ve been surprised and slightly dissapointed by certain family members reactions. I didn’t really think it was something in this day and age. Unfortunately, it appears I was wrong. 

My daughter recently came out too. 
Felt quite strange about it for a few weeks I have to be honest but there’s so many worse things that she could’ve been. She’s a great girl, works hard, she’s clever has great group of pals and her bird is a lovely lass as well. I don’t like the displays of affection in front of me yet haha but I’ll get over it and after she’d said she felt terrible lying to me and her gran (my mum) for a while and I don’t want her not being happy in her life. 

 

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JudyJudyJudy
9 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said:

I can only pretend to understand what you went through but I can remember Lasswade High School in the early 80's and I can't imaging any gay boy or girl having an easy time of, but a girl taking a girl as a their date to the leaving dance is common now, at my sons school at least and this is genuinely heartening to see, I'm delighted my son has the open and accepting attitude he, and his mates have.

Thanks. Don't get me wrong  i wasn't bullied or anything. It was more discreet than that plus my brother and sister were tough nuts so no one would have called me anything. I just wasn't part of " the crowd"   i suppose but in 5th year things changed as we all started to go out to discos etc and i was then part of that crowd.  I also became more confident about myself too. 

Edited by JudyJudyJudy
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JudyJudyJudy
6 minutes ago, jack D and coke said:

My daughter recently came out too. 
Felt quite strange about it for a few weeks I have to be honest but there’s so many worse things that she could’ve been. She’s a great girl, works hard, she’s clever has great group of pals and her bird is a lovely lass as well. I don’t like the displays of affection in front of me yet haha but I’ll get over it and after she’d said she felt terrible lying to me and her gran (my mum) for a while and I don’t want her not being happy in her life. 

 

I admire your honestly about how your feeling about your daughter at the present time. ! My mum took time to accept me . It takes time. I am so glad she is now able to be her authentic self and get the support from you and others. It really matters. 

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11 minutes ago, jack D and coke said:

My daughter recently came out too. 
Felt quite strange about it for a few weeks I have to be honest but there’s so many worse things that she could’ve been. She’s a great girl, works hard, she’s clever has great group of pals and her bird is a lovely lass as well. I don’t like the displays of affection in front of me yet haha but I’ll get over it and after she’d said she felt terrible lying to me and her gran (my mum) for a while and I don’t want her not being happy in her life. 

 

If you need anyone to step in for you for the "displays of affection" between your daughter and her girlfriend pal just you let me know, I'm here for you👍

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15 minutes ago, jack D and coke said:

My daughter recently came out too. 
Felt quite strange about it for a few weeks I have to be honest but there’s so many worse things that she could’ve been. She’s a great girl, works hard, she’s clever has great group of pals and her bird is a lovely lass as well. I don’t like the displays of affection in front of me yet haha but I’ll get over it and after she’d said she felt terrible lying to me and her gran (my mum) for a while and I don’t want her not being happy in her life. 

 

To be fair, the bit in bold, I was the same with my daughter with her boyfriend, it must just be a dad thing in general!

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Two consenting adults can do what they want in private, folk that care about how many cocks are involved are the real deviants

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JudyJudyJudy
1 minute ago, superjack said:

To be fair, the bit in bold, I was the same with my daughter with her boyfriend, it must just be a dad thing in general!

Good point actually 

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jack D and coke
13 minutes ago, JudyJudyJudy said:

I admire your honestly about how your feeling about your daughter at the present time. ! My mum took time to accept me . It takes time. I am so glad she is now able to be her authentic self and get the support from you and others. It really matters. 

It’s a lot of things that go around your head. She’s my only kid and I immediately thought well there goes my grandkids…I know it doesn’t have to be that way but the way they do that I’m not ready for yet either :lol: 

Ive had girlfriends who’ve miscarried and one who was sterilised so it’s just not happened for me for other kids. 
But then you realise it isn’t about what I want at all it’s her life and if she’s happy then it’s good I guess. 
 

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jack D and coke
13 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said:

If you need anyone to step in for you for the "displays of affection" between your daughter and her girlfriend pal just you let me know, I'm here for you👍

:bolt:
:clyay:

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jack D and coke
11 minutes ago, superjack said:

To be fair, the bit in bold, I was the same with my daughter with her boyfriend, it must just be a dad thing in general!

Aye mibbe😬😂

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JudyJudyJudy
4 minutes ago, Lord BJ said:


I was slightly surprised by sister in laws response. She is a bit prejudiced as you alluded to but never once have I witnessed a homophobic prejudice from her previously. She is a hate filled women though.
 

I don’t know what her issue is, though the missus thinks she’s embarrssed as opposed to prejudiced but I’m really not sure. I also suspect she has asked was she gay previously and was told no. So unsure if maybe feels she betrayed. 
 

The niece is a very close to the wife. She sends her a mothers day card as I think wife fulfils a lot of the maternal duty. So we will suppprt her, however, we can. Im just happy shes found someone and they seem to make each other happy. Plus if means sister in law not turning up to my party it is a distinct plus for me. 

 

I’ll be honest I thought we were more accepting, as a society, than we are. Maybe, in part how my kids are around it. They both have multiple friends LGTBQ+ and it’s just seems so much more like the ‘norm’ nowadays. my daughter has a group of girls round for a sleep over and two were gay. It just seems so common in their social groups, as do things like non binary. Attitudes are definitely better in younger generations in my eyes. 

 

 

I have been surprised at some peoples Reponses to LGB too when they haven't known  I was gay , like people in the pub or work mates or in other circumstances.  IM not saying there is massive issue of homophobia but it can and still is an issue for a sizeable amount of people.  It can just be casual throwaway comments like " oh hes a p**" to more aggressive behaviours. I had mentioned before last year when I was heading into a gay bar in Edinburgh for absolutely no reason a lad called me a " p**" he was walking by half pissed. I told him to f%%% off but it really spoilt the rest of my night. Why ????  ( funnily enough he was a Hibbee as he had hibs scarf on ) . Hes lucky my ex didn't hear it as he was lagging behind me to the pub.  He would have been far more aggressive in his response. 

 

That's good your niece has your wife for that missing maternal support.  

 

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JudyJudyJudy
6 minutes ago, Lord BJ said:

Reduced likely hood of grandkids or the likes.

This seems to be a big issue for parents of LG in particular. 

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jack D and coke
1 minute ago, Lord BJ said:


Well I’m glad she is ok and gotten a better reaction than my niece seemed to get. Your bang on it doesn’t change anything and as parents all we want is for our kids to be happy. 
 

If you don’t mind me asking, did you have any idea that she was gay? Can I ask what felt strange, was it just resetting of expectations essentially ie. Reduced likely hood of grandkids or the likes.

 

Is she happier she’s out as a matter of interest. 

I’d had a couple of thoughts about it tbh but just really because she’s a young, tall and attractive girl with plenty lads trying to get her attention. I thought maybe she was just too busy she does work really hard she’s managing the restaurant she’s working at now and I thought maybe she just had some sort of casual things I didn’t pry. 
She told us all on her birthday in March there and it did shock me a little bit and it took me a few weeks to get my head round it. I didn’t treat her different or anything but it occupied my mind a lot for a few weeks. My mum said she had suspected which she hadn’t ever let on to me about. Was funny when she left my mums that day and my mum shouted “I still love you just the same sweetheart” I nearly started greeting :lol: 

She does seem happier now. I think back to last year when she obviously met this girl and she was out for days and at times I was losing the plot with her for not telling me where she was or coming home etc. I never want to stalk her whereabouts but I like her to say I’ll be home tonight dad or whatever. Sometimes I can’t sleep till I hear the door and she was pretty distant and argumentative for a while so I suppose some little signs were there. 
Things are better now I have to say. 

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1 minute ago, jack D and coke said:

I’d had a couple of thoughts about it tbh but just really because she’s a young, tall and attractive girl with plenty lads trying to get her attention. I thought maybe she was just too busy she does work really hard she’s managing the restaurant she’s working at now and I thought maybe she just had some sort of casual things I didn’t pry. 
She told us all on her birthday in March there and it did shock me a little bit and it took me a few weeks to get my head round it. I didn’t treat her different or anything but it occupied my mind a lot for a few weeks. My mum said she had suspected which she hadn’t ever let on to me about. Was funny when she left my mums that day and my mum shouted “I still love you just the same sweetheart” I nearly started greeting :lol: 

She does seem happier now. I think back to last year when she obviously met this girl and she was out for days and at times I was losing the plot with her for not telling me where she was or coming home etc. I never want to stalk her whereabouts but I like her to say I’ll be home tonight dad or whatever. Sometimes I can’t sleep till I hear the door and she was pretty distant and argumentative for a while so I suppose some little signs were there. 
Things are better now I have to say. 

I hope she continues to be happy👍

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JudyJudyJudy
1 minute ago, Lord BJ said:

I have actually found this topic quite refreshing, despite the clear intention of when it was started. 

Yep.  Completely agree. 

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7 minutes ago, jonesy said:

Two’s company, three’s a crowd?

Your crowd sounds like a laugh right enough!

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JudyJudyJudy
8 minutes ago, Lord BJ said:


If I was being honest, if one of my kids came out. It would be, from a selfish point of view, one of the very first thing to go through my mind. That and will they face discrimination. 
 

My mother in law is completely fine with it, was her initial reaction. She’s in her 70’s and think she wants great grandkids and my niece would represent best shot. 
 

I have actually found this topic quite refreshing, despite the clear intention of when it was started. 

In my time my mum was more worried about AIDS and if i got that. I could understand her concern completely. 

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JudyJudyJudy
9 minutes ago, jack D and coke said:

I’d had a couple of thoughts about it tbh but just really because she’s a young, tall and attractive girl with plenty lads trying to get her attention. I thought maybe she was just too busy she does work really hard she’s managing the restaurant she’s working at now and I thought maybe she just had some sort of casual things I didn’t pry. 
She told us all on her birthday in March there and it did shock me a little bit and it took me a few weeks to get my head round it. I didn’t treat her different or anything but it occupied my mind a lot for a few weeks. My mum said she had suspected which she hadn’t ever let on to me about. Was funny when she left my mums that day and my mum shouted “I still love you just the same sweetheart” I nearly started greeting :lol: 

She does seem happier now. I think back to last year when she obviously met this girl and she was out for days and at times I was losing the plot with her for not telling me where she was or coming home etc. I never want to stalk her whereabouts but I like her to say I’ll be home tonight dad or whatever. Sometimes I can’t sleep till I hear the door and she was pretty distant and argumentative for a while so I suppose some little signs were there. 
Things are better now I have to say. 

Great to hear 

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Dusk_Till_Dawn

My daughter’s going out with a girl at her school. She’s never even spoken to us about being gay or whatever because kids today just rock and roll with it in a way people of my age weren’t able to when we were young. It’s great and it’s the progress that was needed. Back when I was in my teens, the thought of being gay would have made me feel physically sick. I can’t believe I used to be like that. Pretty embarrassing really but probably a product of the times.

 

On the trans thing, I get that the thing about women’s space is very delicate and nuanced. But more broadly, trans people need massive amounts of protection and support. That’s my main view of it.

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Konrad von Carstein
52 minutes ago, jack D and coke said:

I’d had a couple of thoughts about it tbh but just really because she’s a young, tall and attractive girl with plenty lads trying to get her attention. I thought maybe she was just too busy she does work really hard she’s managing the restaurant she’s working at now and I thought maybe she just had some sort of casual things I didn’t pry. 
She told us all on her birthday in March there and it did shock me a little bit and it took me a few weeks to get my head round it. I didn’t treat her different or anything but it occupied my mind a lot for a few weeks. My mum said she had suspected which she hadn’t ever let on to me about. Was funny when she left my mums that day and my mum shouted “I still love you just the same sweetheart” I nearly started greeting :lol: 

She does seem happier now. I think back to last year when she obviously met this girl and she was out for days and at times I was losing the plot with her for not telling me where she was or coming home etc. I never want to stalk her whereabouts but I like her to say I’ll be home tonight dad or whatever. Sometimes I can’t sleep till I hear the door and she was pretty distant and argumentative for a while so I suppose some little signs were there. 
Things are better now I have to say. 

Takes after her mum I assume :lol:

 

 

 

Apologies for going with the cliché   :(

 

 

 

Edited by Konrad von Carstein
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JudyJudyJudy
9 minutes ago, Dusk_Till_Dawn said:

My daughter’s going out with a girl at her school. She’s never even spoken to us about being gay or whatever because kids today just rock and roll with it in a way people of my age weren’t able to when we were young. It’s great and it’s the progress that was needed. Back when I was in my teens, the thought of being gay would have made me feel physically sick. I can’t believe I used to be like that. Pretty embarrassing really but probably a product of the times.

 

On the trans thing, I get that the thing about women’s space is very delicate and nuanced. But more broadly, trans people need massive amounts of protection and support. That’s my main view of it.

Thank you for your honesty about your previous views . 

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Dusk_Till_Dawn
2 minutes ago, jonesy said:

I agree with protection and support. Isn't there, however, a line at which subjectivity goes too far and it is quite clear that people are living a reality quite separate from others? Respect can, perhaps unwittingly, become indulgence, which leads to later resentment and unmatched expectations.

 

If sex/gender is no longer immutable, then why not race or age? Both of these were tested - the former, culturally and the latter, legally - and were discovered by public opinion and the law to be immutable despite the same arguments being used as in the transgenderism debate.


There definitely is a line. The trans debate is being skewed by almost imaginary genders being conflated with actual transsexuals - ie people who define themselves in an impossibly complex way and then expect to be able to do whatever they want or go wherever they want. It’s not the same, however much they want it to be.


But actually trans people must get some of the worst victimisation going, which is why it’s a problem that this argument has them at the middle of it. 

 

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JudyJudyJudy
14 minutes ago, jonesy said:

I agree with protection and support. Isn't there, however, a line at which subjectivity goes too far and it is quite clear that people are living a reality quite separate from others? Respect can, perhaps unwittingly, become indulgence, which leads to later resentment and unmatched expectations.

 

If sex/gender is no longer immutable, then why not race or age? Both of these were tested - the former, culturally and the latter, legally - and were discovered by public opinion and the law to be immutable despite the same arguments being used as in the transgenderism debate.

I’m finding the thread very refreshing As many postings are focussing more on LGB issues and views . I may get into some trans issues debates but I’m trying to steer clear of it as such as it already takes up a lot of time which previously LGB occupied . I’ve also felt lees isolated , at times , on this forum by now hearing other experiences with LGB people , in particular family members . It’s been very heart warming to read actually . 
 

No matter how others may spin it sec is immutable . Gender is a social construct based on generally harmful sex stereotypes . 

Edited by JudyJudyJudy
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JudyJudyJudy
2 minutes ago, jonesy said:

 

I be immutable, so I be. Argh.

 

oldseacaptain_1.jpg

 

 

😂😂😂 I’m on the bus so struggling to type lol hence the typo Captain Jones 

Edited by JudyJudyJudy
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1 hour ago, BigAlim said:

Two consenting adults can do what they want in private, folk that care about how many cocks are involved are the real deviants

I dunno. Any more than 12 and I have to draw the line…. 👀

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jack D and coke
47 minutes ago, Konrad von Carstein said:

Takes after her mum I assume :lol:

 

 

 

Apologies for going with the cliché   :(

 

 

 

20 odd years ago her mum was tidy as😋

Off a fecking cliff about ten years ago tho and thankfully my daughter has more of my personality than her mums😎

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1 minute ago, jack D and coke said:

 

Off a fecking cliff about ten years ago tho ....

FFS and I thought I was blunt🤣

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jack D and coke
15 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said:

FFS and I thought I was blunt🤣

Mate this has been some fall let me tell ye :lol: 

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Just now, jack D and coke said:

Mate this has been some fall let me tell ye :lol: 

🤣

My oldest and best mate went to a school reunion a few years ago, he said some of the proper wee rides at school had turned into some real swampdonkeys since he'd last seen them, glad I never went.

Edited by Dawnrazor
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Konrad von Carstein
33 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said:

🤣

My oldest and best mate went to a school reunion a few years ago, he said some of the proper wee rides at school had turned into some real swampdonkeys since he'd last seen them, glad I never went.

Swampdonkeys :lol:

 

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jack D and coke
44 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said:

🤣

My oldest and best mate went to a school reunion a few years ago, he said some of the proper wee rides at school had turned into some real swampdonkeys since he'd last seen them, glad I never went.

:lol: 

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Konrad von Carstein
1 hour ago, Dawnrazor said:

🤣

My oldest and best mate went to a school reunion a few years ago, he said some of the proper wee rides at school had turned into some real swampdonkeys since he'd last seen them, glad I never went.

Swampdonkeys :lol:

 

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Dick Dastardly

The idea of being gender fluid really confuses me. I saw someone being interviewed on tv  and they were saying that one day they would wake up and feel like a woman and go by one name, another day they might feel like a man and go by a different name. I'm in no way a medical expert but that sounds more like a serious mental condition than anything else

 

And whats the difference between being gay and queer? 

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Watt-Zeefuik
8 hours ago, superjack said:

This is something a just can't understand, how could a parent just stop meeting their kids because of something so trivial? We were out last night in Inverness with friends. 1 of the couples don't speak with their daughter because she married another woman. In every other way, they are perfectly reasonable people. They refused to go to their daughters wedding FFS. My other mate, her brother, was almost completely ostracised from the family because he went to the wedding with his mother. Even she, the granny, can't understand why her daughter is like that towards her own child.

 

I did a short vocational discernment class at a retreat center, and in the cohort was an older Black woman who's late son was gay. Because she was in a conservative church at the time, the pastor told her to throw her son out until he repented, or something. She did, even though it hurt her deeply. He moved to New York and ended up contracting HIV, and eventually she decided to go see him. His community there was the larger LGBT community, and his friends really embraced her and supported her, and fortunately she was able to reconcile with her son and apologize before he passed. All the same, she left with a deep sense of rage at her former pastor for robbing her of all those years with her son. At the time I knew her, she was trying to figure out what work she could do to reach out to other parents in similar situations to keep them from making that same horrible mistake.

 

It's why I can get so noisy about this—both why I'll push a little harder than I might otherwise to make sure people know that there are plenty of churches that won't foist this garbage on people, and why I push back so hard against the trans panic nonsense. People have to make their own decisions, and while the toxic voices will probably always be the loudest, I refuse to let them be the only voices.

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