AlimOzturk Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 You know one of those ones where only a bit of toilet wrapped round the finger and only a slight insert and jiggle cures. Aye. I was delievered 30 erdinger beers from a mate who works in a pub but we’re going out of date. Pretty that caused the itchy ring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlimOzturk Posted January 16, 2021 Author Share Posted January 16, 2021 And am ****ing steaming again btw Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 4 minutes ago, AlimOzturk said: And am ****ing steaming again btw 😅😅😅 so much for being off it untill March!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kila Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Is that what you tell the ladies when you're at a strippers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boof Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 9 minutes ago, AlimOzturk said: And am ****ing steaming again btw I daresay 30 Erdingers might do that to a chap... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovecraft Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Erdinger is actually German for an infected finger. Fact! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cruyff Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 14 minutes ago, Lovecraft said: Erdinger is actually German for an infected finger. Fact! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlimOzturk Posted January 16, 2021 Author Share Posted January 16, 2021 21 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said: 😅😅😅 so much for being off it untill March!!! When you get free beer mate it would be rude not to get suck into it. Itchy ring or not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Just now, AlimOzturk said: When you get free beer mate it would be rude not to get suck into it. Itchy ring or not. That's what I like about you Alim.......your Iron will😅👍 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Hoop, you get well soon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cade Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janbo1874 Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Dongcaster Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Utter tramp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlimOzturk Posted January 16, 2021 Author Share Posted January 16, 2021 3 minutes ago, Neil Dongcaster said: Utter tramp Somebody has to be I suppose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlimOzturk Posted January 16, 2021 Author Share Posted January 16, 2021 18 minutes ago, Candy said: Hoop, you get well soon thanks. I am sure I’ll recover as soon as the erdingers are finished. Just realised erdinger....finger...probably should go to my soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beni Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 If you have the hip flexibility to do this you'll never feel more alive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovecraft Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Just off to get myself another Erdinger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NANOJAMBO Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 43 minutes ago, Lovecraft said: Erdinger is actually German for an infected finger. Fact! "Erdinger ringer" . Just Googled it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angry Haggis Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Japanese flag. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovecraft Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 4 minutes ago, NANOJAMBO said: "Erdinger ringer" . Just Googled it. 😁 Hope safesearch was on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NANOJAMBO Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 3 minutes ago, Lovecraft said: 😁 Hope safesearch was on. Is now 😆 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jack D and coke Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 21 minutes ago, fancy a brew said: If you have the hip flexibility to do this you'll never feel more alive. 21 minutes ago, Lovecraft said: Just off to get myself another Erdinger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 I was tempted to say "pictures or it didn't happen" but thought better of it, however, seeing Alim dragging his ringpiece across the living room carpet like a wormy auld collie dug could be worth seeing😆 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kila Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 3 minutes ago, Dawnrazor said: I was tempted to say "pictures or it didn't happen" but thought better of it, however, seeing Alim dragging his ringpiece across the living room carpet like a wormy auld collie dug could be worth seeing😆 God forbid he finds an upturned plug on his travels Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auld Reekin' Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 51 minutes ago, Lovecraft said: Just off to get myself another Erdinger. Itchy-Ring Bark, from the little-known bootleg LP "It's A Dog's Life", by the Small Faeces. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kila Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 10 minutes ago, jonesy said: Or Lego. Or a piece of sliced chilli on the kitchen floor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeff Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 1 hour ago, Dawnrazor said: The small things in life eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovecraft Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 8 minutes ago, Auld Reekin' said: Itchy-Ring Bark, from the little-known bootleg LP "It's A Dog's Life", by the Small Faeces. Think I've heard it. Is that the one with B side called Erdinger Swinger Stinger? He met her a club She said she was a singer He thought she was pretty But his mates said she was a minger He spent one night with her She put him through the wringer The next day he went for a piss It really was a stinger Oooooh an Erdinger Stinger It nips like ****, it really is a zinger Oooooh an Erdinger Stinger She was known to be a swinger Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gjcc Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 2 hours ago, AlimOzturk said: You know one of those ones where only a bit of toilet wrapped round the finger and only a slight insert and jiggle cures. Gateway to bumming. Congrats on coming out. 👍🏻 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auld Reekin' Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 4 minutes ago, Lovecraft said: Think I've heard it. Is that the one with B side called Erdinger Swinger Stinger? He met her a club She said she was a singer He thought she was pretty But his mates said she was a minger He spent one night with her She put him through the wringer The next day he went for a piss It really was a stinger Oooooh an Erdinger Stinger It nips like ****, it really is a zinger Oooooh an Erdinger Stinger She was known to be a swinger Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beni Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 22 minutes ago, kila said: God forbid he finds an upturned plug on his travels Depends on what type of plug it was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tazio Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 57 minutes ago, kila said: God forbid he finds an upturned plug on his travels Or a cheese grater. I still make an involuntary noise at the Tom And Jerry when he slides down a cheese grater with his ring piece. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auld Reekin' Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Mind you, all this talk of Erdinger is fine, but if it's genuine, 100%, authentic, absolutely-guaranteed, ring-piece-ruination you're after then there's really only one candidate for the job: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Салатные палочки Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 2 hours ago, Dawnrazor said: One of lifes little wonders. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Locky Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Don't **** with German wheat beer. You will not win. On one of my first trips to Germany, I was staying with my mate who's in-laws run a restaurant/hotel. Let us have a lock in and I was necking the wheat beers for fun. They're just too damn drinkable, but **** did I regret it. Honestly can't remember anything after about the 9th or 10th pint. Apparently I got carried up to my bed (**** knows how, I'm about 20 stone) and I woke up spewing and had the worst head ache ever. That morning we had to do the 6 hour coach trip up to Gelsenkirchen for the Schalke game and I could barely keep my eyes open for the whole journey. Only time in my life where I think I've been too hungover to actually want to go to the game. Especially in 30 degree heat. But a few cold lagers sorted me out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auld Reekin' Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 47 minutes ago, Locky said: Don't **** with German wheat beer. You will not win. On one of my first trips to Germany, I was staying with my mate who's in-laws run a restaurant/hotel. Let us have a lock in and I was necking the wheat beers for fun. They're just too damn drinkable, but **** did I regret it. Honestly can't remember anything after about the 9th or 10th pint. Apparently I got carried up to my bed (**** knows how, I'm about 20 stone) and I woke up spewing and had the worst head ache ever. That morning we had to do the 6 hour coach trip up to Gelsenkirchen for the Schalke game and I could barely keep my eyes open for the whole journey. Only time in my life where I think I've been too hungover to actually want to go to the game. Especially in 30 degree heat. But a few cold lagers sorted me out. I think that applies with any German beer! However, I've actually found that I've felt better after a heavy sesh there if I've been drinking an unfiltered German beer (e.g. hefeweiss, zwickel, kellerbier) than if I've been on the lagers / pils / exports. I suppose it's just whatever best suits (or fecks with less) your constitution... Anyway, it's fun trying them all! (Apart from the kölsch, of course, which is shite... ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Locky Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 1 hour ago, Auld Reekin' said: I think that applies with any German beer! However, I've actually found that I've felt better after a heavy sesh there if I've been drinking an unfiltered German beer (e.g. hefeweiss, zwickel, kellerbier) than if I've been on the lagers / pils / exports. I suppose it's just whatever best suits (or fecks with less) your constitution... Anyway, it's fun trying them all! (Apart from the kölsch, of course, which is shite... ) Aye there's definitely a correlation between those beers. The beautiful part about German beers is they're all brewed in accordance to the Germany Purity Laws which have stood for hundreds of years. So all beers in Germany should be made up of purely water plus whatever the individual beer needs. Barley, wheat, hops, malt etc. None of your additives, emulsifiers or any chemical shite that we put in the beer here to assist mass production and profits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Until @Auld Reekin' and @Locky got involved in this thread, it was classless. 😩 Some good info on German beer from this pair. 👍 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Locky Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Just now, Morgan said: Until @Auld Reekin' and @Locky got involved in this thread, it was classless. 😩 Some good info on German beer from this pair. 👍 I'm a man of culture as you know Morgs. Currently sipping on a cold Augustiner Hell. Beautiful. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 7 minutes ago, Locky said: I'm a man of culture as you know Morgs. Currently sipping on a cold Augustiner Hell. Beautiful. That goes without saying, Locks. 👍 Your prose, and indeed your knowledge on certain subjects, leaves one in no doubt about that. Enjoy your Hell! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milky_26 Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Itchy ring? Is that a failed product from Iceland? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auld Reekin' Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 21 minutes ago, Locky said: I'm a man of culture as you know Morgs. Currently sipping on a cold Augustiner Hell. Beautiful. A man of wealth and taste...??? Good taste in beer anyway! 🍻 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tazio Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Your hoop is in a very finely balanced state normally. Just the right balance of oils in the skin is essential. Go daft and go into a frenzy of scrubbing with toilet paper and you dry it out and it itches like crazy as it’s too dry. Or so an ex told me, apparently it’s why men suffer from arse itch worse than women as we aren’t as delicate about wiping. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Locky Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 31 minutes ago, Morgan said: That goes without saying, Locks. 👍 Your prose, and indeed your knowledge on certain subjects, leaves one in no doubt about that. Enjoy your Hell! Lover of culture, hater of Hibs ****s. 16 minutes ago, Auld Reekin' said: A man of wealth and taste...??? Good taste in beer anyway! 🍻 Well, I've got to go and listen to that now. Excellent choice of song. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Space Mackerel Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Kellogg’s All Bran is the answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gashauskis9 Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 5 hours ago, jonnothejambo said: A chicken phal is the answer. The itch will be replaced by the Map of Bonanza. 😂 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Locky Posted January 17, 2021 Share Posted January 17, 2021 7 hours ago, AlimOzturk said: And am ****ing steaming again btw Polished 5 big bottles of German lager. Got 6 Stella to come. I'll no be far behind you Alim. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gjcc Posted January 17, 2021 Share Posted January 17, 2021 6 minutes ago, Locky said: Polished 5 big bottles of German lager. Got 6 Stella to come. I'll no be far behind you Alim. Hopefully not wielding a friendly soothing finger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Locky Posted January 17, 2021 Share Posted January 17, 2021 Just now, gjcc said: Hopefully not wielding a friendly soothing finger. Hey, what are mates for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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