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***OFFICIAL SUMMER TRANSFER THREAD***


Absolute Scenes

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Jamboscanbevicius
55 minutes ago, johnking123 said:

I predict that we will sign a player today 

 

Wouldn’t be entirely surprised. There is usually a bit of a pattern to put pre-season PR.

 

We space it out. Announce something not great (Vanecek leaving), deflect from

that with a real positive  like a signing (Halkett), intersperse with low level positive stories (youngsters contracts).

 

However, they know we need something a bit meatier to give ticket sales a little boost, so may be time to announce a signing... fingers crossed!

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davemclaren
7 minutes ago, Jamboscanbevicius said:

 

Wouldn’t be entirely surprised. There is usually a bit of a pattern to put pre-season PR.

 

We space it out. Announce something not great (Vanecek leaving), deflect from

that with a real positive  like a signing (Halkett), intersperse with low level positive stories (youngsters contracts).

 

However, they know we need something a bit meatier to give ticket sales a little boost, so may be time to announce a signing... fingers crossed!

Oh you cynic you. 

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1 hour ago, johnking123 said:

We tend to sign a player the day before or first day of preseason training. 

This 

 

Would set the weekend up nicely and may encourage more to sign up for a season ticket 

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Jamboscanbevicius
32 minutes ago, davemclaren said:

Oh you cynic you. 

 

True Dave... but I’m not criticising. It’s a fairly sound way to manage comms.

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I would be very happy if we announced Grot, could make it a whole Gaurdians of the Galaxy theme 

 

Berra as Starlord (most of his upfield punts end up in space) 

Uche as Drax the destroyer (of centre backs) 

Grot as Groot (he is Groot in Dutch) 

Edwards as rocket racoon (runs about the pitch like a hyperactive rodent) 

Levein as Gamorah (elite combatant) 

 

Special appearance by Neil Lennon as Nebula (bitter, twisted, hates Gamorah and does anything to please their master) 

 

Guest starring David Vanacek as Fat Thor 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll get my coat

 

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Leveins Battalion
1 hour ago, Pans Jambo said:

Really???

:interehjrling:

 

 

0_GD9434141.jpg

2 out of 5 weren't bad...Better record than oor Craig.?....

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1 minute ago, Bozi said:

I would be very happy if we announced Grot, could make it a whole Gaurdians of the Galaxy theme 

 

Berra as Starlord (most of his upfield punts end up in space) 

Uche as Drax the destroyer (of centre backs) 

Grot as Groot (he is Groot in Dutch) 

Edwards as rocket racoon (runs about the pitch like a hyperactive rodent) 

Levein as Gamorah (elite combatant) 

 

Special appearance by Neil Lennon as Nebula (bitter, twisted, hates Gamorah and does anything to please their master) 

 

Guest starring David Vanacek as Fat Thor 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll get my coat

 

 

I'm fine with all of this apart from Edwards. Raccoons are not rodents. The rest makes perfect sense though.

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23 hours ago, Icon of Symmetry said:

 

I watched Crawley Town v Mansfield Town a couple of years ago. The standard was awful. Few levels between that and Hearts, it'd be a massive step up.

 

Well, maybe - but I think you're either underselling League Two in England or over-selling the SPL. The standard up here on any random match involving the bottom 6 is bloody awful too.

 

I'd expect a team like Lincoln, say, to survive comfortably in the SPL, tbh.

Edited by HighTimes
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7 minutes ago, HighTimes said:

 

Well, maybe - but I think you're either underselling League Two in England or over-selling the SPL. The standard up here on any random match involving the bottom 6 is bloody awful too.

 

I'd expect a team like Lincoln, say, to survive comfortably in the SPL, tbh.

I agree. It's the same level as Uche came from, at a similar age. Doesn't automatically mean Walker would be a success, but the bottom end of the Scottish Prem is not good at all. Worse than a lot of us would like to admit.  

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I love how people think our marketing team spend time coordinating and synchronising the timing of announcing new players.

 

If we have two new guys signed up who are about to get on a training pitch tomorrow to start training then why wouldn’t we announce them both today. Cat will be out the bag tomorrow anyway when the new dudes pitch up at Riccarton.

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Absolute Scenes

might be nothing (most definitely nothing and me trying to pass myself off as Detective Rebus) but Jamie Walker has followed Craig Halkett on Instagram.

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Jamboscanbevicius
13 minutes ago, Jammy T said:

I love how people think our marketing team spend time coordinating and synchronising the timing of announcing new players. 

 

If we have two new guys signed up who are about to get on a training pitch tomorrow to start training then why wouldn’t we announce them both today. Cat will be out the bag tomorrow anyway when the new dudes pitch up at Riccarton. 

 

Of course they do... it is literally what PR and Comms do!

 

For example, you don't announce negative news on a slow news day, when it takes centre stage. You announce it when it will get quickly looked past. It is PR 101.

 

Sometimes (especially these days with social media etc) we have no choice but to announce signings immediately because the news is already out there, but for others we absolutely coordinate it for maximum impact. It would be poor management not to.

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58 minutes ago, Jamboscanbevicius said:

 

Of course they do... it is literally what PR and Comms do!

 

For example, you don't announce negative news on a slow news day, when it takes centre stage. You announce it when it will get quickly looked past. It is PR 101.

 

Sometimes (especially these days with social media etc) we have no choice but to announce signings immediately because the news is already out there, but for others we absolutely coordinate it for maximum impact. It would be poor management not to.

Perfect example, Celtic announcing they’d appointed Lennon during their treble tremble celebrations when their fans were talking about Benitez and managers at that level. 

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Bazzas right boot
3 hours ago, Bozi said:

I would be very happy if we announced Grot, could make it a whole Gaurdians of the Galaxy theme 

 

Berra as Starlord (most of his upfield punts end up in space) 

Uche as Drax the destroyer (of centre backs) 

Grot as Groot (he is Groot in Dutch) 

Edwards as rocket racoon (runs about the pitch like a hyperactive rodent) 

Levein as Gamorah (elite combatant) 

 

Special appearance by Neil Lennon as Nebula (bitter, twisted, hates Gamorah and does anything to please their master) 

 

Guest starring David Vanacek as Fat Thor 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll get my coat

 

 

All very good.... 

 

 

But what type / size of mice/ rats you dealt with in the past!!!! 

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2 hours ago, Absolute Scenes said:

might be nothing (most definitely nothing and me trying to pass myself off as Detective Rebus) but Jamie Walker has followed Craig Halkett on Instagram.

 

That's because Jamie Walker is coming back 

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GorgieFifeLife
2 minutes ago, dazajmbo said:

 

That's because Jamie Walker is coming back 

Why is it not yet announced?

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55 minutes ago, Rudolf said:

Perfect example, Celtic announcing they’d appointed Lennon during their treble tremble celebrations when their fans were talking about Benitez and managers at that level. 

 

Not really. It was still noticed and went down like a sack of shit with celtic fans.

Edited by Jammy T
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Portable Badger
15 hours ago, Auld Reekin' said:

 

Can't take all of the credit...

 

"Well now, the result of last week's competition when we asked you to find a derogatory term for the Belgians. Well, the response was enormous and we took quite a long time sorting out the winners. There were some very clever entries. Mrs Hatred of Leicester said 'let's not call them anything, let's just ignore them' (applause starts vigorously, but he holds his hands up for silence) and a Mr St John of Huntingdon said he couldn't think of anything more derogatory than 'Belgians'. (cheers and applause; a girl in showgirl costume comes on and holds up placards through next bit) But in the end we settled on three choices: number three... the Sprouts (placard 'The Sprouts'), sent in by Mrs Vicious of Hastings... very nice ; number two... the Phlegms (placard) from Mrs Childmolester of Worthing; but the winner was undoubtedly from Mrs No-Supper-For-You from Norwood in Lancashire... Miserable Fat Belgian Barstewards!!! (placard; roar of applause)  "

 

http://www.montypython.net/scripts/prejudice.php

Brilliant !!!!!

 

?????????

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16 minutes ago, dazajmbo said:

 

That's because Jamie Walker is coming back 

So what other "goss" might you may have heard regarding players leaving/arriving??

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16 minutes ago, GorgieFifeLife said:

Why is it not yet announced?

Waiting for some good news to release at the same time?

 

 

 

 

 

::troll::

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Absolute Scenes
19 minutes ago, dazajmbo said:

 

That's because Jamie Walker is coming back 

 

:thumbs_up: good stuff

I actually feel alright about this, feel like he's sobered up a bit and realised he'll have a lot to prove

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1 minute ago, Haken said:

Waiting for some good news to release at the same time?

 

 

 

 

 

::troll::

 

:rofl:

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2 minutes ago, Absolute Scenes said:

 

:thumbs_up: good stuff

I actually feel alright about this, feel like he's sobered up a bit and realised he'll have a lot to prove

 

Something to prove - loyalty.

 

Realism to sink in - Hearts will be the pinnacle of his playing career so he’d best make the most of his second (last) chance.

Edited by Jammy T
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Maroonblood22
7 minutes ago, number-16 said:

Hamill surely

 

Ach forgot about him, still think it's mole though as we need oppshuns up front.

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alwaysthereinspirit

Not sure where I stand with this. On one hand it appears a good fit but on the other hand maybe not. I'm going to sit on the fence on this. 

He had a good run when he was with the team but tapered off near the season end. Could turn it around again and possibly be worth a punt.

We need someone in that position so he might just fit the bill. Although he may not want to play for Levein with the past history between them.

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Just now, alwaysthereinspirit said:

Not sure where I stand with this. On one hand it appears a good fit but on the other hand maybe not. I'm going to sit on the fence on this. 

He had a good run when he was with the team but tapered off near the season end. Could turn it around again and possibly be worth a punt.

We need someone in that position so he might just fit the bill. Although he may not want to play for Levein with the past history between them.

Passed history? Whats that mate?

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Levein has a type. Big, strong, doesn't score many goals. He sounds perfect.

 

I look forward to the day when we move away from the big target man approach and try playing football with fast skilful forwards who know how to score goals.

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We're writing him off because he didn't score many goals for one of the smallest teams in a league that's much better than ours?  

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1 minute ago, Bellion said:

We're writing him off because he didn't score many goals for one of the smallest teams in a league that's much better than ours?  

With you on that. It'd be hard for any striker to get goals in a poor team 

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alwaysthereinspirit
11 minutes ago, Pans Jambo said:

Passed history? Whats that mate?

I'm sorry, I was just being a dink. I couldnt even open the attachment so just waffled about nothing in particular. Again sorry.

I now feel bad because I assumed no one could actually read the attachment. I'm an @$$.

Edited by alwaysthereinspirit
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1 minute ago, alwaysthereinspirit said:

I'm sorry, I was just being a dink. I couldnt even open the attachment so just waffled about nothing in particular. Again sorry.

:lol: ?

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44 minutes ago, Jammy T said:

 

Something to prove - loyalty.

 

Realism to sink in - Hearts will be the pinnacle of his playing career so he’d best make the most of his second (last) chance.

 

The thing I feel he struggle to prove more than his loyalty will be his fitness, missed a huge chunk of last season with knee surgery and even the 18 games he did make it onto the park he only averaged 46 mins per game

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1 hour ago, Jammy T said:

 

Not really. It was still noticed and went down like a sack of shit with celtic fans.

Aye, compared to 5 sacks of shit...

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32 minutes ago, Notts1874 said:

Not having a pop Ben, i presume you are the author of the article, but have you seen anymore of this boy than the rest of us? 

And is Grot not more of a wide player than a striker? 

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Absolute Scenes
5 minutes ago, Gav M said:

And is Grot not more of a wide player than a striker? 

 

He's valued at £1.13million which means there's a reason he's worth that much

Also says on transfrmrket he can play left and right winger so was not used as an out and out striker for the Dutch club

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Absolute Scenes
36 minutes ago, gnasher75 said:

Levein has a type. Big, strong, doesn't score many goals. He sounds perfect.

 

I look forward to the day when we move away from the big target man approach and try playing football with fast skilful forwards who know how to score goals.

 

 

He's a winger, not a target man striker - We already have one of those

Also his main attributes is that he's quick and skillful

 

Edited by Absolute Scenes
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7 minutes ago, Absolute Scenes said:

 

He's valued at £1.13million which means there's a reason he's worth that much

Also says on transfrmrket he can play left and right winger so was not used as an out and out striker for the Dutch club

Cheers, thought I was going crazy there, could have sworn he was a wide player ? turns out he is.

We've also been linked with chucks Aneke who is a big, strong, quick and skilful midfielder so certainly looks like we are trying to address some of the issues from last season.

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Absolute Scenes
8 minutes ago, Gav M said:

Cheers, thought I was going crazy there, could have sworn he was a wide player ? turns out he is.

We've also been linked with chucks Aneke who is a big, strong, quick and skilful midfielder so certainly looks like we are trying to address some of the issues from last season.

 

Its all good mate you were right!

Chuks also has a good scoring record which would be a bonus. Having someone next to Uche who is the more clinical one is what we should be going for - I love the big man, but I know we cant rely on him for all goals. He's a big asset to us though and really does help in games, but we need a goalscorer and Chucks could be the fellae!

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1 hour ago, Haken said:

Waiting for some good news to release at the same time?

 

 

 

 

 

::troll::

 

Waiting to bury it under some good news. Brilliant. ?

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Phil D. Corners
2 hours ago, GorgieFifeLife said:

Why is it not yet announced?

 

Not ITK. But if he’s been told to he can leave, maybe, like Naismith, he’s waiting for his June wages. 

 

Or maybe everyone that needs to make this happen is still on holiday. 

Edited by Phil D. Corners
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