''Why men should pay on 1st dates''

[Bridge of Djoum]

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-46164568

 

Discuss.

[redjambo]

Nope. It's completely up to the two people to do what's comfortable for them both, without any societal pressure.

[FWJ]

Cake and eat it.

[The Internet]

Canadian women, on average, earn C$0.69 for every dollar a man makes

 

And the man's only left with 0.31

[Bindy Badgy]

 

[ri Alban]

Only certain types of men go Dutch or worse have the woman pay. Virgins. 

[Bridge of Djoum]

1 hour ago, redjambo said:

Nope. It's completely up to the two people to do what's comfortable for them both, without any societal pressure.

The point in the article that interested me was her view that the gender pay gap was somehow relevant. She seemed to be saying she likes the traditional aspect of men paying, but fails to recognize women are often paid more than men nowadays.

 

For the record, my wife earns more than I and She's never once paid for dinner. Not that she wouldn't, it's just I like taking her out. I wouldn't feel right, her paying.

 

Each to their own of course. 

[Bridge of Djoum]

13 minutes ago, ri Alban said:

Only certain types of men go Dutch or worse have the woman pay. Virgins. 

Bizarre post.

[Cade]

In the interests of complete equality, you should compare pay slips when sitting down to dinner then paying the exact ratio of difference between the two of you.

 

Or you could not be a wank and just split the bill.

 

 

[Auld Reekin']

53 minutes ago, Mauricio Pinilla said:

 

 

 

And the man's only left with 0.31

 

[AlimOzturk]

My wife wasn't in work when we first met so I pretty much covered the cost of all our first dates. She felt bad but I had a full time job, living with parents so little outlay and loved spending time out with her. Didn't think it was fair me inviting her out then expecting her to fork out knowing fine well she had no money. 

 

Men are usually the ones doing the chasing and inviting lassies out.  I wouldn't be risking not getting my end away over who pays what on a bill. If I felt there was no chemistry I'd probably suggest splitting the bill however. 

 

This is what happens when you replace meeting in real life with internet dating. 

 

[Shanks]

58 minutes ago, ri Alban said:

Only certain types of men go Dutch or worse have the woman pay. Virgins. 

 

Only certain types of men pay everything for women.  Complete spineless walkovers, that have zero personality so have to make up for it by throwing money at a female. 

[Tazio]

9 minutes ago, Longshanks said:

 

Only certain types of men pay everything for women.  Complete spineless walkovers, that have zero personality so have to make up for it by throwing money at a female. 

[Auld Reekin']

16 minutes ago, Longshanks said:

 

Only certain types of men pay everything for women.  Complete spineless walkovers, that have zero personality so have to make up for it by throwing money at a female. 

 

I've never been happy with having to pay for everything when out with a woman, and - I have to say - always resented having to do when it did happen (not often, I'm glad to say...).

 

But, then again, I am a miserable feckin' skinflint.

 

[jake]

1 hour ago, ri Alban said:

Only certain types of men go Dutch or worse have the woman pay. Virgins. 

Never go Dutch.

Always let the woman pay.

 

Guaranteed .

[Howdy Doody Jambo]

1st dates 2nd dates 3rd dates etc it never stops

[Ray Gin]

46 minutes ago, Longshanks said:

 

Only certain types of men pay everything for women.  Complete spineless walkovers, that have zero personality so have to make up for it by throwing money at a female. 

 

[IronJambo]

1 hour ago, Bridge of Djoum said:

The point in the article that interested me was her view that the gender pay gap was somehow relevant. She seemed to be saying she likes the traditional aspect of men paying, but fails to recognize women are often paid more than men nowadays.

 

For the record, my wife earns more than I and She's never once paid for dinner. Not that she wouldn't, it's just I like taking her out. I wouldn't feel right, her paying.

 

Each to their own of course. 

The same thing raised my eyebrows. I used to pay for most meals because I wanted to and could afford to. These days she earns a considerable amount more than me and with a joint bank account I consider that she's actually paying for me now. Bothered.

[Marvin]

2 hours ago, redjambo said:

Nope. It's completely up to the two people to do what's comfortable for them both, without any societal pressure.

 

Should be half's however the man should offer as long as the burd hasn't ordered the most expensive meal on the menu.

[IronJambo]

54 minutes ago, Longshanks said:

 

Only certain types of men pay everything for women.  Complete spineless walkovers, that have zero personality so have to make up for it by throwing money at a female. 

You've got it all wrong. Whilst I used to pay for most things I was generally relying on a strong tongue and stamina to make up for my lack of personality.

[chester copperpot]

depends how the first date goes.

 

If I like her, will always offer to pay however if she is insistent on going half then won't be a dick about it.

 

if it was poor and I clearly didn't think it was going anywhere then I would split it with her.

[joondalupjambo]

Question.  Where did the phrase Go Dutch originate?  

[Doctor FinnBarr]

I don't get "pocket money" each week, I get what I need as does the wife, works fine for us, if we go out for a meal it all comes out the same pot.

[Sooperstar]

3 hours ago, joondalupjambo said:

Question.  Where did the phrase Go Dutch originate?  

East Asia I believe.

[Sooperstar]

Anyone who watches First Dates knows that if you don't offer to pay then you're the bad guy. However, if the lady is of a mind that she doesn't want to be paid for then it shouldn't be argued against and she has every right to pay her own way, or the whole lot if she likes.

 

It's something that will almost certainly die away within the next decade.

[Mr Brightside]

5 hours ago, Sooperstar said:

Anyone who watches First Dates knows that if you don't offer to pay then you're the bad guy. However, if the lady is of a mind that she doesn't want to be paid for then it shouldn't be argued against and she has every right to pay her own way, or the whole lot if she likes.

 

It's something that will almost certainly die away within the next decade.

It’s been a long time since this was an issue for me, but I always offered to pay for the first date. I would happily agree to split the cost if the girl wanted to.

 

For any other dates after the first I expected the costs to be split and they always were, with the girl always offering to pay half.

[Norm]

Surely it's quite simple? The one who asked the other to go on the date pays. Guy asks out girl, he pays. Girl asks out guy, she pays. 

[FWJ]

Just now, Normthebarman said:

Surely it's quite simple? The one who asked the other to go on the date pays. Guy asks out girl, he pays. Girl asks out guy, she pays. 

This is right.

[gashauskis9]

I always pay on the first date.  The pimps insist.

[Seymour M Hersh]

Tradition. Oddly enough you don't hear much of a discussion about equality over the subject! 

Edited November 25, 2018 by Seymour M Hersh

[Ministry MK2]

If going out for drinks on 1st date, I would always buy the first round. 90% of girls will then oblige by buying the next round. 

 

I think it is seen as a pretty outdated tradition that men pay on dates. I imagine some girls would actually find it quite condescending tbh. 

 

The writer of the article appears to be your classic miss guided SJW with a chip on her shoulder about the “Patriarchy”. 

[Ministry MK2]

17 hours ago, ri Alban said:

Only certain types of men go Dutch or worse have the woman pay. Virgins. 

I get the impression from this post you are not a particularly handsome chap, with very little personality. 

[Marvin]

3 hours ago, Gashauskis9 said:

I always pay on the first date.  The pimps insist.

 

Edited November 25, 2018 by Marvin

[Herbert.]

Usually I will pay. They feel obliged to have sex with you then. I once went on a date with a girl from Dundee who took the huff when I said ok when she offered to buy the juice and popcorn at the cinema dispite me paying for drinks before hand, the taxi to the cinema and the tickets as well as travelling to Dundee to meet her, I was a skint student at the time. A woman should at least offer to get a round in and I usually take it they aren't very interested if they dont.

[Bridge of Djoum]

26 minutes ago, Herbert said:

Usually I will pay. They feel obliged to have sex with you then. I once went on a date with a girl from Dundee who took the huff when I said ok when she offered to buy the juice and popcorn at the cinema dispite me paying for drinks before hand, the taxi to the cinema and the tickets as well as travelling to Dundee to meet her, I was a skint student at the time. A woman should at least offer to get a round in and I usually take it they aren't very interested if they dont.

 

Was this how you dressed on your last date in 1876?

 

Cretinous comment.

[SwindonJambo]

4 hours ago, Gashauskis9 said:

I always pay on the first date.  The pimps insist.

 

Brilliant

[Herbert.]

1 hour ago, Bridge of Djoum said:

 

Was this how you dressed on your last date in 1876?

 

Cretinous comment.

 

 

Is It? Do you not try to pump them on the first date?

[lauriesrank]

Probably construed as sexist or some nonsense however, if I go out with my wife for dinner I always pay, I hold the doors, pull out her chair etc, I have always done that with women, it's common courtesy!

 

If we go out for a drink I buy the first, if we go to the cinema I buy the tickets etc.

 

 

[Bridge of Djoum]

14 minutes ago, Herbert said:

 

 

Is It? Do you not try to pump them on the first date?

Yes, it is. 

 

If you genuinely think  women feel obligated to shag on the 1st date because you bought them dinner, you're a clown. A bigger clown if you expect them to.

 

Have a word.

[redjambo]

Just now, Bridge of Djoum said:

Yes, it is. 

 

If you genuinely think  women feel obligated to shag on the 1st date because you bought them dinner, you're a clown. A bigger clown if you expect them to.

 

Have a word.

 

I assumed Herbert's original comment was just a joke.

[Bridge of Djoum]

1 minute ago, redjambo said:

 

I assumed Herbert's original comment was just a joke.

His posting history suggested otherwise.

 

 

[redjambo]

Just now, Bridge of Djoum said:

His posting history suggested otherwise.

 

Ah ok.

[Bridge of Djoum]

1 minute ago, redjambo said:

 

Ah ok.

1st post could be seen as jokey.

His follow up just confirmed it wasn't. 

[ri Alban]

1 hour ago, redjambo said:

 

Ah ok.

Nobody can take a joke on here. 

Some folk need to remove the poles from their arses. 

[ri Alban]

7 hours ago, Gashauskis9 said:

I always pay on the first date.  The pimps insist.

[Bridge of Djoum]

14 minutes ago, ri Alban said:

Nobody can take a joke on here. 

Some folk need to remove the poles from their arses. 

Where's the joke?

[IronJambo]

13 minutes ago, Bridge of Djoum said:

Where's the joke?

I thought it was a decently amusing throw away comment. This is a football forum remember. The way you're going on suggests that it was verging on the side of being rapey, which it was far from. 

[Bridge of Djoum]

4 minutes ago, IronJambo said:

I thought it was a decently amusing throw away comment. This is a football forum remember. The way you're going on suggests that it was verging on the side of being rapey, which it was far from. 

I don't think it was ''rapey'' at all. What an odd comment. He wasn't kidding as his follow up comment proves. Bizarre behavior to lambaste the individual who points out cringey comments rather than the person who made the comment.

 

Edit. Not sure I used the word ''comment'' enough on my post!

Edited November 25, 2018 by Bridge of Djoum

[spirt of 98]

18 hours ago, joondalupjambo said:

Question.  Where did the phrase Go Dutch originate?  

Holland I presume ?

[Bridge of Djoum]

One suggestion is that the phrase "going Dutch" originates from the concept of a Dutch door, with an upper and lower half that can be opened independently.

The Oxford English Dictionary connects "go Dutch" and "Dutch treat" to other phrases which have "an opprobrious or derisive application, largely due to the rivalry and enmity between the English and Dutch in the 17th century", the period of the Anglo-Dutch Wars. Another example is "Dutch courage".^[1]

The gambling term "dutching" may be related to "go Dutch", as it describes a system that shares stakes across a number of bets. Another possible origin is double Dutch, the jump-rope variation in which partners simultaneously participate. A folk etymology is that the "Dutch" reference derives from Dutch Schultz,^{[citation needed]} a New York gangster of the late 1920s to mid-1930s, who may have used dutching to profit from gambling on horseracing, though his nickname derives from Deutsch ('German'), in reference to his German-Jewish background.