Ryan Jarman Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Some folk just need to call it quits and order a thai bride. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Lithuania Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Maybe 10 years ago perhaps....... these days its fashionable. Okay. I'll just man up an admit it. I'm too ugly for online dating.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Салатные палочки Posted August 2, 2016 Author Share Posted August 2, 2016 I did the online dating thing for a while and failed miserably at it. In my experience, most of the bursds on these sites are there for an ego boost more than anything else - not cos they actually want to date anyone, but more cos they want to tel their mates how many folk messaged them. A fair number of them don't even fill out a profile 'will fill in later' - but will still have an inbox full of thirsty guys based purely on a couple of pics. I was on POF waaaaaaaay waaaaaaay back before it was popular / cool and back then you could just about count on a reply to every message you sent. These days? In my experience probably about 1% of the messages I sent got a reply in return. Of course, that could be as a result of the fact i'm not exactly an image of what the perfect man would look like, or perhaps my patter is just rubbish - maybe both. Who knows. Wouldn't waste my time with it these days. It's POF I'm using and I'm beginning to think I'm wasting my time on it. I might actually need to upgrade to something like Match.com or whatever. My mate is on that and has quite a high success rate and he happily admits he isn't the best looking. The only thing is the price of them is ridiculous. In the perfect world I wouldn't need it but between getting the kids every Friday and second Friday/Saturday I don't get the chance to get out much so I thought, I'll have myself a bit of that. Probably fine if your a muscly, tattooed, top knotted, BMW driving, non-sock/espadrille wearing stock-broker but for the average guy like me, man it's testing. Doesn't do much for the self-esteem I should either lower my standards (which admittedly are lowering as the years go on) or just pack it in and hang up the baws. Spend my life drinking tea, watching homes under the hammer, take up bowls and go for a quiet pint of heavy on a Saturday night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southcap Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 I'm just talking about tinder here. Just an extra avenue for a ride. Nothing wrong with having too many opportunities. I have no idea about the serious dating ones like POF etc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
graygo Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Haha. Can't edit this now. That should read "if I want married". I missed out on the online thing and my Mrs won't let me do it now. That is what it reads. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 That is what it reads. Predictive text issue maybe - think it should read wasn't Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Der Kaiser Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 The lassie sounds like she's playing hard to get. Don't give up....what if her steak pie is delicious? You'll never forgive yourself. Write her a poem or some shit like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southcap Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Her steak pie may be delicious but judging by the description, her fish pie won't be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Koolkeith Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 I've summarised the sites below based on my own and friend's experiences of online dating previously. match.com - ridiculously expensive and doesn't specify between paid members and free ones. Therefore, you could message a girl and she would not be able to see who sent it unless she subscribed. Because it's a pay one. less nut jobs, but also found them to be a bit dull. Tinder - free and works well in that you match with girls, so at least you know there's mutual interest rather than firing of messages in the hope of a reply. Pretty high conversion rate on this, plus it's easy to find them on Facebook due to it's connection. That way you can get an idea of what they might look like in the flesh. POF - free and lots of girls on this. Some weirdos, but on the whole pretty good. Lots of competition from strange men. Even the ugliest girl gets loads of messages a day, OKCupid - Like POF, but a more leftfield. Hippy vegetarian types. At the end of the day though it's like real life in that the most attractive people will have the most success. Most people will be somewhere in the middle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heartsmad1874 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Any updates on this? Did you reply to her message or did you just pie her Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IronJambo Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 (edited) That is what it reads. Phone making a ***** of me lol. Must poof read in the future. Edited August 2, 2016 by IronJambo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Салатные палочки Posted August 2, 2016 Author Share Posted August 2, 2016 Any updates on this? Did you reply to her message or did you just pie her Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk Kind of update. Appears she has noticed that my POF profile is active. I'm not sure entirely what she expected but at no point did I say I was only chatting to her. Now the texts have calmed and maybe she is getting the hint. Feel shit for it because she was a nice lass but I just don't fancy her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrWinningSmith Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 A JBK Dating advice thread is what the world needs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
graygo Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 (edited) Phone making a ***** of me lol. Must poof read in the future. Edited August 2, 2016 by graygo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tian447 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 (edited) A JBK Dating advice thread is what the world needs. I have to credit audioslave for my all time favourite JKB post: Posted 01 September 2012 - 05:46 PM Women trawling the internet for vulnerable men to have their wicked way with are not the way forward CC my good man. Here's audioslave's top tips for being single AND successful; 1) See those standards you currently have - get them chucked right out the window 2) Replace those standards with those of a 15 year old boy. Confused? I'll simplify - just have the mindset of "I'll literally ride anyone" 3) Always make sure you're smashed - everyone's patter is infinitely better with a skinful in them 4) No matter what a dame tells you, you pretend to be interested - you've got 2 arseholes? Fascinating. You're a bed wetter? Tell me more. 5) Obey the 3 pump rule - no matter how great a girl is in terms of look/chat/potential wife material - once you've bagged her 3 times, cease all communication 6) Find another single chum who's a lot less attractive than you. Chances are when he's got a skinful in him and tries to chat up a Betty she'll be horrified, then you swoop in and seem like this years model. 7) Always have at least 3 dafties on the go at once 8) If all else fails - get a hooker Thank you and good night. Edited August 2, 2016 by tian447 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 I have to credit audioslave for my all time favourite JKB post: Never seen that before. Barry! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radio Ga Ga Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 POF ??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iantjambo Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 POF ??? Plenty of Fish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gashauskis9 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 POF ??? Plenty Of Filling Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Piss of fatty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 POF Pies of Flank Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbo1874 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Pishflaps Overly Flappy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawnrazor Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Plenty Of ****** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Peroni or Fosters? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Pishy Old Flaps Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
151 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 POF ??? Preying on Filth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamboy1982 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Pie on Friday Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gashauskis9 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Come on Salad, this is the only reason I got up today. What's the latest??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riddley Walker Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Penis on Fish. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Gin Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Probably Overweight Frauds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riddley Walker Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Poisoned Ovaries Fatty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
151 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Photoshopped, Obese, Fake. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jim747 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Pubes On Fire Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tian447 Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Pubes On Fire I believe your doctor can prescribe something to help with that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
¼½¾ Posted August 2, 2016 Share Posted August 2, 2016 Pumping Outstretched Fatties. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
151 Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Pumped One Five Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chuck berrys hairline Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Pillaging Of Fatso's Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riddley Walker Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Pregnant Or Fat? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain America Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Plump Obese Fatties Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maroon Sailor Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Pretty or Fugly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Jarman Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 perishing ovary frenzy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobboM Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 (edited) POF ??? Pricks or Fhannies Edited August 3, 2016 by RobboM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Homme Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Pies Offered Freely Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tian447 Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Can we get this thread back on track please? Did Salad Fingers get her pumped? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Dunphy Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Never fails to amaze me that some birds think they're going to get a match by posting pictures of their pets. "She's not the nicest looking, seems a bit of a bore. But she has a dog. That'll do!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Салатные палочки Posted August 3, 2016 Author Share Posted August 3, 2016 Can we get this thread back on track please? Did Salad Fingers get her pumped? I don't know who has friend-zoned who but that's pretty much where it's at right now. Down to a couple of texts a day now. As shallow as it sounds, now that I have seen she is not the nicest looking, I am not as willing to text as often or as flirtily as before. Shame though, I was enjoying the increasingly flirty messaging, thinking about meeting and GHP based on her profile picture. I am more than happy to update the thread on any "new matches" or messages though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Jarman Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Looks like old Lefty will be getting used and abused for a bit longer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heartsmad1874 Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 Get on there and message every bursd you can, This thread needs a spark Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chester copperpot Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 At least give us her pof profile name so we can have a wee nosey. Happy to take a PM if you dont wanna share on here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morgan Posted August 3, 2016 Share Posted August 3, 2016 At least give us her pof profile name so we can have a wee nosey. Happy to take a PM if you dont wanna share on here Yeah - profile name please. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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