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Creepy Lurker

When I started using Facebook I set myself a limit of 30 online friends at the start. I felt this would be a manageable number. Once I got to 30 I stayed there for quite a while bumping friend requests from folk i used to work with and some that I did work with. Bumped quite a few requests over the years from old school friends as well.....

although I say friends.....

.....what i really mean is people who went to the same school as me and while attending similar classes wouldn't give me the time of day because they had their head rammed so far up their own erse and that of their little wanky clique OR I wasn't cool enough to converse with them because my "mummy and daddy" didn't open their wallets to every feckin whim I had OR they were simply plain weird ("No I don't own a ferret but please tell me more about killing rabbits")

So what makes them think now that because we're both older and more mature I'd want to share any of my life with them? We weren't friends in the slightest at school so why on gods green earth would I be interested where you're going on holiday (with the inevitable "4 sleeps to go!"), pictures of your kid on their new bike from 76 different angles because I'd struggle to grasp exactly how that would look from one clear picture or even a PICTURE WHICH TELLS ME YOU WERE ABLE TO FOLLOW STEP BY STEP INSTRUCTIONS IN A COOK BOOK TO MAKE A FOOKIN CURRY FROM SCRATCH!

And people from my old jobs. I spoke to you because your desk was beside mine and i believed that attempting to be on speaking terms would make my job less stressful. I don't like you. I never liked you. Most folk in the office didn't like you. 5 appauling secret santa gifts, derisory collections for your birthdays and sitting alone on nights out didn't give you any sort of hint that your personality and personal hygiene might actually be off putting? But hey....we've not spoke in 7 years....what are you having for your tea?

 

I went over 30 last year.......months later culling folk from my Facebook to bring it down was actually quite liberating.

Surprisingly in the cut I didn't cull my wifes pal who still posts these with increasing regularity

"What time does (INSERT SHOP NAME) open?".....

And no....she's not hot? Blocked from my feed straight away but it doesn't block her on my phone annoyingly??

 

I'm really close to cancelling Facebook.....but every so often I can't quite resist the urge to use it to have a dig at someone....even better when they don't even realise I'm having a dig. This is probably my main reason for staying.

 

This post probably makes me sound like a C__t

 

But I am......

 

Sounds like you're still bitter about having been a geek at school, tbh.

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My mate lost a shit ton of weight recently. Obviously everyone on his facebook knows this, as they know him. He decided to post a big post about his weight loss, including soppy motivational quotes and pictures of himself topless. It got 97 likes, 40 comments and he was all "OMG didn't expect this reaction, thanks everyone!!" blah blah. What did you expect, posting something so masturbatory in a public forum, populated by people you know?

 

I'm happy for the boy, but he should just be proud of his own achievement, and not need to feed off the false validation of facebook "likes". I despise folk that use facebook to make themselves feel better. It's so sad.

 

I think we may have a mutual friend...

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Back of the Bus

 

 

:rofl:

 

I have people like this on mine, no matter what they post it goes totally uncommented and unliked.

 

I have one that makes me subject to seeing things like "Cried myself to sleep again tonight" and "I just don't know what to do anymore, I need help" which get precisely 0 likes and 0 comments.

 

It's funny in a completely and utter tragic attention seeking way.

 

EDIT - should probably contact some sort of Suicide Watch or something.

 

:rofl: :rofl:

 

"Been let down again by my so called freinds"

 

*cue tumbleweed*

 

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Sergio Garcia

:rofl: :rofl:

 

"Been let down again by my so called freinds"

 

*cue tumbleweed*

 

A girl on mine put that up before and someone replied "Probably should be less of a cow then ya boot"

 

For someone that status got swiftly deleted.

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Back of the Bus

 

 

A girl on mine put that up before and someone replied "Probably should be less of a cow then ya boot"

 

For someone that status got swiftly deleted.

 

It's not a post that will ever end well for the author.

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Sergio Garcia

It's not a post that will ever end well for the author.

 

I have seen folk reply "They aint worth it babes" and stuff of similar ilk but the author is looking for an ego massage.

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Back of the Bus

 

 

I have seen folk reply "They aint worth it babes" and stuff of similar ilk but the author is looking for an ego massage.

 

Tragic chat all round.

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Arg :seething:

 

One of the moron bursds on my Facebook just asked for help with some Uni work, asking if someone could show her how to do something with graphs. One of her moron friends replied with:

 

Im good with computers x U use Microsoft yeah? x

 

Microsoft aye? :facepalm:

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BoJack Horseman

Me too. Initials JB?

Nah, AM is the initials i'm thinking of.

 

Neither are the subject of my post. Sounds like a trio of roasters.

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Hannibal Lecter

Very rarely ever use my Facebook account, personally think it's a load of crap.

 

My girlfriend's best mates is one of those seriously annoying mothers who does nothing but post statuses and pics of her wee baby girl. Sick hearing about every lil thing. Never met the lassie and I'm getting dragged along to the christening in a few weeks and apparently she is as much a bam in real life. God help me

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Chris Benoit

384043_4509628784998_1366087274_n.jpg

 

No it doesn't you absolute cretins.

 

 

Did it not happen last year? Remember seeing the same thing doing the rounds

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384043_4509628784998_1366087274_n.jpg

 

No it doesn't you absolute cretins.

 

That annoys me. Do these idiots who post this actually believe it?

 

Facebook is for having a laugh and getting trips away organised etc.

 

I hate people who look for sympathy etc. They get deleted.

 

In fact I hate people.

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Just came across this on that 1-5 page :lol:

 

 

 

Graeme McLean is using this site as dating agency. Not impressed. I'm hearts through and through and found a message today personal. Not impressed a fellow jambo would stoop so low. Graeme.McLean5. Get a grip.

 

 

:rofl:

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Generic Username

 

 

 

Neither are the subject of my post. Sounds like a trio of roasters.

 

Initials GM for the boy you're on about Rog?

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Generic Username

If I looked like her and some random wanted to pump me I'd be falling over my own flaps to get a date arranged.

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If you read through her FB posts, she's exactly the sort of person the OP is about :rofl:

 

I'm one lucky lady. Got the best m8 's who don't judge me and love me for who I am and also know I will always have there back x thank you xxxxxx

 

Had a brilliant meal with harry and my cousin Pauline and her husband x just great xxxxxx

 

To my husband / how many people said we wouldn't make it nearly 25 years approaching and I know were not doing anything exciting but as long as we do something together that's what counts as the vows say. For. Richer for poorer in sickness & in health. Never a truer line. Look forward to Tuesday xxxxxx

 

Kisses on the end of FB statuses :seething:

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Sterling Archer

4 posts in two hours about having a drink at Harvey Nichols, way to show you belong.

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Generic Username

4 posts in two hours about having a drink at Harvey Nichols, way to show you belong.

 

She'll have brought her own bottle of wine with her.

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Doctor FinnBarr

If you read through her FB posts, she's exactly the sort of person the OP is about :rofl:

 

I'm one lucky lady. Got the best m8 's who don't judge me and love me for who I am and also know I will always have there back x thank you xxxxxx

 

Had a brilliant meal with harry and my cousin Pauline and her husband x just great xxxxxx

 

To my husband / how many people said we wouldn't make it nearly 25 years approaching and I know were not doing anything exciting but as long as we do something together that's what counts as the vows say. For. Richer for poorer in sickness & in health. Never a truer line. Look forward to Tuesday xxxxxx

 

Kisses on the end of FB statuses :seething:

 

Thats terrible Clare, xx

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This makes me glad I've ducked out of Facebook the last few months.

 

And I don't have any mates on there that are roasters.

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Sterling Archer

If I looked like her and some random wanted to pump me I'd be falling over my own flaps to get a date arranged.

 

Thing is she does look like you...

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Generic Username

 

 

Thing is she does look like you...

 

I have suffered a series of strokes recently and given up on toothpaste.

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The Great Khali

Fraser McQueen

What are you wearing, Jacqueline? I'm so horny right now. xxx

3 ? 1 hour ago

 

:rofl:

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Creepy Lurker

Fraser McQueen

What are you wearing, Jacqueline? I'm so horny right now. xxx

3 ? 1 hour ago

 

:rofl:

 

:jjyay:

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Pete Seeger

Creepy has played a blinder on that post. What an absolute throbber of a girl. Toys well and truly launched from the pram now.

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Creepy Lurker

Has that thread been pulled? I was half way through saying that it's difficult typing with one hand. :(

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The Great Khali

Has that thread been pulled? I was half way through saying that it's difficult typing with one hand. :(

 

:rofl:

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Creepy Lurker

Someone else started a new comment thread about it. It's hurting my eyes.

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Sterling Archer

Someone else started a new comment thread about it. It's hurting my eyes.

 

:muggy:

 

Give the world the Internet and they'll find a way to kick the arse out of anything.

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Prince Buaben

Someone on mine is excited. They are getting a...

 

..New ******* Boiler :cornette:

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Guest Bilel Mohsni

Someone on mine is excited. They are getting a...

 

..New ******* Boiler :cornette:

 

Dumped by the old one for being s boring bassa, imo.

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Ron Swanson

This is doing the rounds on my Facebook now.

 

970248_550152738376625_390553975_n.jpg

 

****MUST READ****MUST READ****MUST READ****

 

Any one who has kids needs to read this .......

 

ATTENTION EVERYONE!!!!!

Do not purchase Capri suns. If you haven't heard already there have been alot of stories of people drinking these Capri suns and a worm or something, yes a WORM comes out!well IT'S TRUE!

Yesterday my boyfriends sister was drinking one when she started saying the juice was barely coming out and it tasted funny we pulled up the straw and saw this worm hanging from it!

There are tons of stories and complaints on this problem and KRAFTs food is still putting Capri suns on store shelves!

This is so foul and discussting! They should recall all Capri sun products! Kids drink these things!

So please everyone do not purchase or drink any Capri suns because you will see what I'm talking about!!

Like & share please to get the word around! Like & share

 

:vrface:

 

603149_429621327109350_1181048645_n_zpsdee3884f.jpg

 

Seen this cracker a while back. Muppets going "OMG this is so great!"

 

Quickly shot down with what if your number is 1991?

 

Its the same folk all the time that share this s****e, gulable doesn't even come close.

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