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#1 Dawnrazor

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:02 pm

The boss got me a bottle of Madeira Wine from the very place at the weekend when he came back from holiday, I said to Mrs Dawnrazor to pour me a glass.........well, in half a glass time that'll be the bottle arsed :shock: feck me it proper wreck the hoos's juice :only:
It's a bit like a cross between Thunderbird Red Label and Sherry, anyone else had it?
Edit
As I manage my own time......think I'll take tomorrow morning off :facepalm:

Edited by Dawnrazor, 20 March 2017 - 10:05 pm.


#2 Morgan

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:16 pm

The boss got me a bottle of Madeira Wine from the very place at the weekend when he came back from holiday, I said to Mrs Dawnrazor to pour me a glass.........well, in half a glass time that'll be the bottle arsed :shock: feck me it proper wreck the hoos's juice :only:
It's a bit like a cross between Thunderbird Red Label and Sherry, anyone else had it?
Edit
As I manage my own time......think I'll take tomorrow morning off :facepalm:


That is a post to look back on.

:wow:

#3 VladMagic

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:23 pm

I'm a member of a "gentleman's" club. We get together twice a year for drinks, laughs, conversation good food and we raise money for charity. 

 

One of our group has a poem/story about Madeira. I will search for it now.



#4 VladMagic

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:28 pm

A tale of the wonderful properties of the magnificent Madeira.

 

http://www.iankitchi...po/madeira.html

 

Having enjoyed a glass or 2 over the years it really is rocket fuel and capable of loosening the tightest of skirts!!



#5 Dawnrazor

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:43 pm

A tale of the wonderful properties of the magnificent Madeira.

http://www.iankitchi...po/madeira.html

Having enjoyed a glass or 2 over the years it really is rocket fuel and capable of loosening the tightest of skirts!!

It's Monday night and I'm feckin pished!!!!
I need to get more of this!!

Ednid

Thank **** four spillchucker!!

Edited by Dawnrazor, 20 March 2017 - 10:44 pm.


#6 Morgan

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:46 pm

It's Monday night and I'm feckin pished!!!!
I need to get more of this!!
Ednid
Thank **** four spillchucker!!


Tremendous.

#7 Sydney

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:47 pm

Is it really a date-rape poem?



#8 Morgan

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:52 pm

Is it really a date-rape poem?


:qqb006:

#9 AlimOzturk

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 10:54 pm

Only Jake balls get pished on a Monday. I at least leave it until Tuesday to give my liver a break from the excess achohol on the Saturday

#10 chester copperpot

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 11:18 pm

Only Jake balls get pished on a Monday. I at least leave it until Tuesday to give my liver a break from the excess achohol on the Saturday



What if the last time you were 'on it' was a Friday?

Week off with a broken foot so bored out my skull and got a few gifts from the Isle of Skye today (bottle of Talisker, some Isle of Skye ales etc etc)

#11 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 08:12 am

Oh my God my head :facepalm:

#12 redm

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 09:40 am

Oh my God my head :facepalm:


:laugh:

#13 Doogz

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 09:50 am

Oh my God my head :facepalm:

:gotwife:  :olly:



#14 been here before

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 11:19 am

Ever so slightly a little off topic-ish...

 

Boy walks into a bakers and points to some cakes asking how much they cost. "50p" says the baker "all my cakes cost 50p". The boy then points to some other cakes on the counter and asks how much they cost, "50p" says the baker, "all the cakes in here cost 50p". "I see", says the boy, "what about those ones over there", he asks pointing to some cakes on a shelf.. "I've just told you", comes the reply, "every cake in here costs 50p". "I see" says the customer "and those ones over there, how much are they?"

 

The baker takes a look behind him before turning back to the customer and telling him "ahhh those cakes cost £1".

 

The boy looks a bit confused "I thought you said every cake in here cost 50p".

 

"They do", said the baker, "but that's Madeira cake".

 

  :10900:



#15 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 12:21 pm

Oh my God my head :facepalm:


:yas:

#16 ericb

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 12:49 pm

The boss got me a bottle of Madeira Wine from the very place at the weekend when he came back from holiday, I said to Mrs Dawnrazor to pour me a glass.........well, in half a glass time that'll be the bottle arsed :shock: feck me it proper wreck the hoos's juice :only:
It's a bit like a cross between Thunderbird Red Label and Sherry, anyone else had it?
Edit
As I manage my own time......think I'll take tomorrow morning off :facepalm:

 

I too am an advocate of the stuff, after being on the island and visited a Blandys vineyard shop with try before you buy. It was littered with locals and tourists absolotely plastered on the stuff.

 

Blandys No. 5 is the business, but difficult to get in UK, most supermarkets sell Blandys, "Duke of Clarence", which is a suitable alternative,

 

Have to say if you drink it with a coffee, as the locals do, you will have no hangover.



#17 Irufushi

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 03:00 pm

Ever so slightly a little off topic-ish...

Boy walks into a bakers and points to some cakes asking how much they cost. "50p" says the baker "all my cakes cost 50p". The boy then points to some other cakes on the counter and asks how much they cost, "50p" says the baker, "all the cakes in here cost 50p". "I see", says the boy, "what about those ones over there", he asks pointing to some cakes on a shelf.. "I've just told you", comes the reply, "every cake in here costs 50p". "I see" says the customer "and those ones over there, how much are they?"

The baker takes a look behind him before turning back to the customer and telling him "ahhh those cakes cost £1".

The boy looks a bit confused "I thought you said every cake in here cost 50p".

"They do", said the baker, "but that's Madeira cake".

:10900:


:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

#18 redm

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 03:09 pm

Ever so slightly a little off topic-ish...

Boy walks into a bakers and points to some cakes asking how much they cost. "50p" says the baker "all my cakes cost 50p". The boy then points to some other cakes on the counter and asks how much they cost, "50p" says the baker, "all the cakes in here cost 50p". "I see", says the boy, "what about those ones over there", he asks pointing to some cakes on a shelf.. "I've just told you", comes the reply, "every cake in here costs 50p". "I see" says the customer "and those ones over there, how much are they?"

The baker takes a look behind him before turning back to the customer and telling him "ahhh those cakes cost £1".

The boy looks a bit confused "I thought you said every cake in here cost 50p".

"They do", said the baker, "but that's Madeira cake".

:10900:


:laugh:

Enjoyed that.

#19 jonnothejambo

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 03:43 pm

Oh my God my head :facepalm:



Nae sympathy here.....:rofl:

Might take yer mind off yer pork bayonet for a while.

#20 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 03:44 pm

Nae sympathy here.....:rofl:
Might take yer mind off yer pork bayonet for a while.


Doubt it.

#21 Alex

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 03:52 pm

It's Monday night and I'm feckin pished!!!!
I need to get more of this!!

Ednid

Thank **** four spillchucker!!

 

It makes me sad that only 304 people have viewed this amazing statement!



#22 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 04:04 pm

It makes me sad that only 304 people have viewed this amazing statement!


304 LUCKY people though.

Don't forget that.

#23 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 04:42 pm

I too am an advocate of the stuff, after being on the island and visited a Blandys vineyard shop with try before you buy. It was littered with locals and tourists absolotely plastered on the stuff.
 
Blandys No. 5 is the business, but difficult to get in UK, most supermarkets sell Blandys, "Duke of Clarence", which is a suitable alternative,
 
Have to say if you drink it with a coffee, as the locals do, you will have no hangover.

Blandys No.5 it was, very nice too.
The Boss did say it was more a dessert wine and not just for quaffing..... I really should listen to him more!

#24 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 04:45 pm

Nae sympathy here.....:rofl:
Might take yer mind off yer pork bayonet for a while.

Thanks for the sympathy!!! And I don't think I could have got any life into it last night even If I strapped a defibrillator to it!!

#25 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 04:46 pm

It makes me sad that only 304 people have viewed this amazing statement!


It's OK, I've fixed the spellchecker now :embarrassed: :whistling:

Edited by Dawnrazor, 21 March 2017 - 04:47 pm.


#26 jonnothejambo

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 04:55 pm

Thanks for the sympathy!!! And I don't think I could have got any life into it last night even If I strapped a defibrillator to it!!


:rofl:

Then you would have two sore heads.....

#27 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:00 pm

Thanks for the sympathy!!! And I don't think I could have got any life into it last night even If I strapped a defibrillator to it!!

:gok:



#28 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:02 pm

Blandys No.5 it was, very nice too.
The Boss did say it was more a dessert wine and not just for quaffing..... I really should listen to him more!

What was it's ABV Dawn?



#29 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:09 pm

19% vol.

#30 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:17 pm

19% vol.

Good going then!!  :2thumbsup:

 

Was it not a wee bit sweet to be guzzling a whole bottle? :lol:

 

:olly:



#31 milky_26

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:18 pm

Good going then!!  :2thumbsup:

 

Was it not a wee bit sweet to be guzzling a whole bottle? :lol:

 

:olly:

you're assuming he actually tasted it and didn't just pour it down his throat



#32 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:23 pm

you're assuming he actually tasted it and didn't just pour it down his throat

Very true!



#33 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:37 pm

Good going then!!  :2thumbsup:
 
Was it not a wee bit sweet to be guzzling a whole bottle? :lol:
 
:olly:

Aye, a wee bit but it really was nice, but by Christ what a thumping head it gives you!

#34 jonnothejambo

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:39 pm

Aye, a wee bit but it really was nice, but by Christ what a thumping head it gives you!


:oohmatron:

#35 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:40 pm

:oohmatron:


Not in "happy ending" manner Jonno ya dirty sod!

#36 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:46 pm

Aye, a wee bit but it really was nice, but by Christ what a thumping head it gives you!

So, obviously you'll be staying off the bevvy tonight?

 

:rolleyes5:



#37 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:46 pm

:oohmatron:

Nap.



#38 jonnothejambo

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:47 pm

Nap.


:tlj:

#39 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:49 pm

So, obviously you'll be staying off the bevvy tonight?
 
:rolleyes5:

Oh aye, we've a table booked on Saturday night at a really nice place for mothers day, I'll have a pint there and get a bottle of knicker loosener on the way home but nothing between then and now.

#40 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 05:54 pm

Oh aye, we've a table booked on Saturday night at a really nice place for mothers day, I'll have a pint there and get a bottle of knicker loosener on the way home but nothing between then and now.

:vrface:



#41 milky_26

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 06:11 pm

Oh aye, we've a table booked on Saturday night at a really nice place for mothers day, I'll have a pint there and get a bottle of knicker loosener on the way home but nothing between then and now.

with a silver tongue like that you probably don't need the bottle, women will be throwing themselves at you



#42 Dawnrazor

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 06:20 pm

with a silver tongue like that you probably don't need the bottle, women will be throwing themselves at you


Yep, constantly carrying this big about to beat the bitches off :devil2:

#43 Morgan

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 06:21 pm

with a silver tongue like that you probably don't need the bottle, women will be throwing themselves at you

He's a real romantic aye?



#44 jonnothejambo

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 06:25 pm

Oh aye, we've a table booked on Saturday night at a really nice place for mothers day, I'll have a pint there and get a bottle of knicker loosener on the way home but nothing between then and now.


Christ on a bike.

The silver tongued cavalier strikes again.

:groundhog:

#45 jonnothejambo

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 06:25 pm

with a silver tongue like that you probably don't need the bottle, women will be throwing themselves at you


Aye. Like lemmings off a feckin cliff..

#46 milky_26

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 06:29 pm

Aye. Like lemmings off a feckin cliff..

sadly that is a myth, disney forced them off a cliff the murdering cartoonists. they also won the best documentary oscar for it


Edited by milky_26, 21 March 2017 - 06:29 pm.


#47 jonnothejambo

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 06:31 pm

sadly that is a myth, disney forced them off a cliff the murdering cartoonists. they also won the best documentary oscar for it


Cruel barsteward that Disney bloke.